Dating after Lockdown

[yankydoo]

What's everyone's views on dating more than one person at a time (obviously we can't at the moment). When I first started all of this I would date numerous guys on the go. Then I got sick of it and focused on one guy at a time. It all ultimately led to the same outcome and looking back I regret letting a couple of people go.

My view now is until both of you have had the talk and decided to be exclusive then to keep dating others. I also listened to a Ted Talk once which suggested to do this as it takes your focus off one person and you automatically become more chilled out as all your eggs aren't in one basket so to speak.

 

[ThreeSteaksPam]

I really like the idea of this but have always found the reality difficult and time consuming, particularly in the talking stages.

I struggle to keep multiple conversations going at the same rate and always just end up gravitating more to one person and letting the others peter out. Which is annoying if it turns out that the one you’ve chosen to focus on is a time waster and you wish you hadn’t been so quick to dismiss the others

 

[Woolmercardington]

I struggle to find one man I want to date, let alone multiple

 

[realhousewivewannabe]

I struggle to find one man I want to date, let alone multiple

Haha we’re so similar. This post reminded me of this too

 

[sleepflowers]

This is how most men look to me

 

[Woolmercardington]

So, I was messaging last night with the bloke I've been chatting with since the first lockdown. Just a few lighthearted jokey texts but we've been in consistent conversation for the past couple of weeks.

I teased him over a jokey comment he made and he didn't reply. This was only 9.30pm, a bit early for him to have turned in. His status showed he was online up to around 11pm.

Anyway, got a reply from him earlier this afternoon that consisted of nothing but... a rolling eyes emoji!

I mean, what? I can't get with using emojis as a substitute for actual words at the best of times but this is very unlike him. To me that is just a complete conversation killer and gives me zero to follow up with.

Not only that, but if it was a smiley or thumbs up, it would have still been a conversation stopper but a rolling eyes one seems to say 'you've pissed me off' or 'I'm fed up'.

How odd. I'm not responding to it but why do things always get weird over texts? This is why I hate doing it for so long.

 

[sleepflowers]

So, I was messaging last night with the bloke I've been chatting with since the first lockdown. Just a few lighthearted jokey texts but we've been in consistent conversation for the past couple of weeks.

I teased him over a jokey comment he made and he didn't reply. This was only 9.30pm, a bit early for him to have turned in. His status showed he was online up to around 11pm.

Anyway, got a reply from him earlier this afternoon that consisted of nothing but... a rolling eyes emoji!

I mean, what? I can't get with using emojis as a substitute for actual words at the best of times but this is very unlike him. To me that is just a complete conversation killer and gives me zero to follow up with.

Not only that, but if it was a smiley or thumbs up, it would have still been a conversation stopper but a rolling eyes one seems to say 'you've pissed me off' or 'I'm fed up'.

How odd. I'm not responding to it but why do things always get weird over texts? This is why I hate doing it for so long.

That's really weird! I'd just say '???' to throw the ball back to him, so to say. They really shoot themselves in the foot with their terrible conversation skills at times

 

[Woolmercardington]

That's really weird! I'd just say '???' to throw the ball back to him, so to say. They really shoot themselves in the foot with their terrible conversation skills at times

It is really odd, isn't it? It's not the type of nonsense I would have pegged with him either. I'm more inclined to ignore him now rather than respond in any way.

 

[realhousewivewannabe]

It is really odd, isn't it? It's not the type of nonsense I would have pegged with him either. I'm more inclined to ignore him now rather than respond in any way.

So weird. Men are weird! My suggestion would be to ignore too! Xx

I have an update about the guy I posted about. I didn’t speak to him since Saturday or block him on WhatsApp (just incase he had the decency to say anything to me) long story short his texts were He is upset I hadn’t texted (delusional or what) him since Saturday and that I had unfollowed him on Instagram (how the f does he know?? Is he that sad he has an app?) anyway then I had missed calls, messages that I was childish, guarded and got blocked then unblocked () then he told me he wants casual and that he wishes me the best..

WTAF?

 

[no-no]

The thought of dating gives me chills my ex was warped, no matter how well the relationship was going he had no impulse control when it came to messaging women via social media. Think I’m going to stay single for the foreseeable.

 

[it’s not been changed?!]

I know I had a moan about someone last week deleting their account on bumble that I was speaking to, but I’ve just done the same. I was talking to 2 guys but I knew it wouldn’t go anywhere, so I deleted my profile. why do I keep doing it to myself? I’ll probably make a new account next week.

 

[Cocoflowers]

After everything happening this week with that poor sarah has really put me off talking to any guys at all. Just feel its a waste of time and none of them are serious. Even had a guy try message me on 5 accounts and I'm really not ok of opening up to someone again after that guy in a relationship has seriously messed with my head

 

[realhousewivewannabe]

Yep, the case of Sarah has really put me off too! I used to live not far from Clapham Common too. I would regularly go to bars and restaurants there and have walked (ran home sometimes too). Unfortunately it’s really hard to know which guys are “nice” and “normal”. I don’t want to be groped by random guys, don’t want to risk my life everytime I go on an online date either.
I searched on my WhatsApp the amount of times guys had said to me something along the lines “I’m not a murderer” as a way like that makes you more inclined to meet them. So hard stay safe this weekend all! Xxxx

 

[it’s not been changed?!]

I matched with a bloke on hinge yesterday after he’d commented on 1 of my photos saying something along the lines of “ur stunning” he looked ok in 2 out of his 5 photos, so thought I’d give him a go. So once we matched he sent another message saying “wow your gorgeous x” and I sent back “original” and I’ve looked this morning and he’s unmatched me.
I don’t know why women get called petty all the time. Men are just as bad

 

[Wowitsme]

I matched with a bloke on hinge yesterday after he’d commented on 1 of my photos saying something along the lines of “ur stunning” he looked ok in 2 out of his 5 photos, so thought I’d give him a go. So once we matched he sent another message saying “wow your gorgeous x” and I sent back “original” and I’ve looked this morning and he’s unmatched me.
I don’t know why women get called petty all the time. Men are just as bad

tbh I’d of unmatched you too. What was he suppose to say? What’s the point in starting a conversation negatively

 

[it’s not been changed?!]

tbh I’d of unmatched you too. What was he suppose to say? What’s the point in starting a conversation negatively

don’t make me feel like I was being mean!

 

[Wowitsme]

don’t make me feel like I was being mean!

not mean, but after a message like that it’s not exactly like you’d want to continue the conversation lol. It’s just a negative way to start it out.

 

[Keylimepie99]

I think with texting, a lot can be misunderstood and lost! My partner was an over texter, 3 years ago I matched him on tinder, told him he was too much, and where to go. 3 years later..... madly in love with him!!He's the kindest, most loving soul! I completely forgot we even spoke 3 years ago! I just feel someones personality can be portrayed quite differently over text!!

 

[bookish]

I met a guy yesterday who I was really excited to meet (he was actual gentry). He told me he wasn't looking for long-term relationships as he enjoyed the fluency of meeting several people and he, by the age of 28, had had 15 girlfriends to date.

Here's a reminder. ladies. When a guy tells you who they are, believe them. Don't tempt yourself to think you can change him

 

[it’s not been changed?!]

not mean, but after a message like that it’s not exactly like you’d want to continue the conversation lol. It’s just a negative way to start it out.

No love lost. He used the wrong your/you’re.