Dating after Lockdown

Status
Thread locked. We start a new thread when they have over 1000 posts, click the blue button to see all threads for this topic and find the latest open thread.
New to Tattle Life? Click "Order Thread by Most Liked Posts" button below to get an idea of what the site is about:
hun I know that feeling it’s awful but youre better off not having his number especially if he is making no effort! Not worth it better knowing now than meeting him and liking him! My friends do a 3 month thing 3 months on the app if it doesn’t work out they come off for a bit then go on again so they feel refreshed🤍🤍
Oh thank you for this, I'm so glad I'm not alone in feeling like this!
 
  • Heart
  • Like
Reactions: 2
Oh thank you for this, I'm so glad I'm not alone in feeling like this!
Loads of us here have said this is exactly how we feel. The conversation with the bloke I've been chatting with for ages had just regressed to responding with an emoji and not following anything up for a couple of weeks or more. It's easy to see he has got bored and I honestly can't be bothered either. It all does feel very much like what's the point.
 
  • Like
Reactions: 8
We are all in this together @alwayslurkin 💕💕💕

I have had a complete wobble the past two days. I guess it was a mixture of the pandemic stress/reality, the the thoughts about lockdown ending and general anxiety associated with what it all means and general feelings of hopelessness dating, life, direction etc.

I’ve been looking at flats this past week and I just feel completely overwhelmed. I was told by someone (a neighbour) in a catch up this week we discussed all things and my property search. He ended it with a well it’s about time I “sort my life out and get settled” 😬 ffs I’m 28!

Then by a male friend (he’s quite a brotherly figure to me and we had a phone catch up today) we discuss dating a bit and how I’m not having any success. His response was “Well, this is your problem you’re never going to find someone to be with if you don’t sleep with them”. Let’s just say I feel even shitter now and I feel like an absolute freak. For context I’ve never been ALL the way with someone. The only guy I started to is the one who ghosted me 👌😬




I’m not necessarily asking for advice more a vent (but if you have any I’ll take it too xx) I just write on here as I can’t always talk to people 🥲 IRL.
 
Last edited:
  • Heart
  • Like
  • Sad
Reactions: 11
We are all in this together @alwayslurkin 💕💕💕

I have had a complete wobble the past two days. I guess it was a mixture of the pandemic stress/reality, the the thoughts about lockdown ending and general anxiety associated with what it all means and general feelings of hopelessness dating, life, direction etc.

I’ve been looking at flats this past week and I just feel completely overwhelmed. I was told by someone (a neighbour) in a catch up this week we discussed all things and my property search. He ended it with a well it’s about time I “sort my life out and get settled” 😬 ffs I’m 28!

Then by a male friend (he’s quite a brotherly figure to me and we had a phone catch up today) we discuss dating a bit and how I’m not having any success. His response was “Well, this is your problem you’re never going to find someone to be with if you don’t sleep with them”. Let’s just say I feel even shitter now and I feel like an absolute freak. For context I’ve never been ALL the way with someone. The only guy I started to is the one who ghosted me 👌😬




I’m not necessarily asking for advice more a vent (but if you have any I’ll take it too xx) I just write on here as I can’t always talk to people 🥲 IRL.
This is me to a T at the moment and I'm struggling with anxiety to the point where I am having panic attacks, which has never happened to me before. I think this why I went on Bumble in the hopes it'd distract me, but it only made me feel shitter as I disrupted my sleeping pattern for some guy who wouldn't message me back properly 😩 like what is wrong with me

I feel you re the "sorting yourself out" it's like ffs leave me be to live life at my own pace! As though we don't put enough pressure on ourselves as it is...
 
  • Like
  • Heart
Reactions: 3
We are all in this together @alwayslurkin 💕💕💕

I have had a complete wobble the past two days. I guess it was a mixture of the pandemic stress/reality, the the thoughts about lockdown ending and general anxiety associated with what it all means and general feelings of hopelessness dating, life, direction etc.

I’ve been looking at flats this past week and I just feel completely overwhelmed. I was told by someone (a neighbour) in a catch up this week we discussed all things and my property search. He ended it with a well it’s about time I “sort my life out and get settled” 😬 ffs I’m 28!

Then by a male friend (he’s quite a brotherly figure to me and we had a phone catch up today) we discuss dating a bit and how I’m not having any success. His response was “Well, this is your problem you’re never going to find someone to be with if you don’t sleep with them”. Let’s just say I feel even shitter now and I feel like an absolute freak. For context I’ve never been ALL the way with someone. The only guy I started to is the one who ghosted me 👌😬




I’m not necessarily asking for advice more a vent (but if you have any I’ll take it too xx) I just write on here as I can’t always talk to people 🥲 IRL.
You're not a freak at all and you're not the only one. I messed about with a guy at 18 but then nothing until I was 30 where a random date turned into a friends with benefits thing for a short while. And there has only been one guy since. For me its almost a barrier because it feels so hard to explain that I haven't really been with anyone and so it becomes a viscious cycle.
 
  • Like
  • Heart
Reactions: 4
This is me to a T at the moment and I'm struggling with anxiety to the point where I am having panic attacks, which has never happened to me before. I think this why I went on Bumble in the hopes it'd distract me, but it only made me feel shitter as I disrupted my sleeping pattern for some guy who wouldn't message me back properly 😩 like what is wrong with me

I feel you re the "sorting yourself out" it's like ffs leave me be to live life at my own pace! As though we don't put enough pressure on ourselves as it is...
hunny there is nothing wrong with you I promise you were all like this even the ones who don’t let on! I was absolutely gutted the first guy I met off hinge we were talking for months really got along we had the best date my anxiety was horrific then the next day he went all funny and then I just never heard from him it completely knocked me it was awful and I cried after one date I full on couldn’t stop crying!! Everyday I couldn’t understand what was wrong with me. Then at Christmas I met someone in a restaurant! Someone I’d never go for I thought he was completely cocky anyway from that moment that was it really I have a beautiful little girl + he thinks it’s amazing how I do everything + he’s so supportive (I work full time + being single mummy) Was always someone needed to slot in we were never changing + my daughter always always comes first 💫
 
  • Heart
  • Like
Reactions: 7
We are all in this together @alwayslurkin 💕💕💕

I have had a complete wobble the past two days. I guess it was a mixture of the pandemic stress/reality, the the thoughts about lockdown ending and general anxiety associated with what it all means and general feelings of hopelessness dating, life, direction etc.

I’ve been looking at flats this past week and I just feel completely overwhelmed. I was told by someone (a neighbour) in a catch up this week we discussed all things and my property search. He ended it with a well it’s about time I “sort my life out and get settled” 😬 ffs I’m 28!

Then by a male friend (he’s quite a brotherly figure to me and we had a phone catch up today) we discuss dating a bit and how I’m not having any success. His response was “Well, this is your problem you’re never going to find someone to be with if you don’t sleep with them”. Let’s just say I feel even shitter now and I feel like an absolute freak. For context I’ve never been ALL the way with someone. The only guy I started to is the one who ghosted me 👌😬




I’m not necessarily asking for advice more a vent (but if you have any I’ll take it too xx) I just write on here as I can’t always talk to people 🥲 IRL.
Girl, I’m so sorry you feel like that but I’m here to tell you that you really shouldn’t. You are in no way a freak and you’re not defined by your sex life and it’s yours to choose how you use it (or lose it)

You do what you feel comfortable with and if someone isn’t willing to respect that then why would you wanna be with them anyway!

It took me a long time to meet someone who I genuinely liked and I had many years of being sad and impatient. People would tell me it would happen eventually and I would be like can you piss off please. But they were right and it happens I promise! Unless you’re a serial killer, keep being you x
 
  • Like
  • Heart
Reactions: 4
My bestie works in the police and she says there's been a spike in rape cases over lockdown. Women are more frequently going back to men's houses who they've met online as the only alternative atm is a socially distanced walk in the park. So be careful out there, ladies!
 
  • Sad
  • Like
  • Wow
Reactions: 6
My bestie works in the police and she says there's been a spike in rape cases over lockdown. Women are more frequently going back to men's houses who they've met online as the only alternative atm is a socially distanced walk in the park. So be careful out there, ladies!
See this is what I find difficult, there are men out there who haven’t met or been with women for a long long time, who wants to meet someone who is desperate for a sh*g?

I’ve just been on a walk with someone and as soon as I said something slightly cheeky he couldn’t stop from that. It my fault partly but some men don’t know when to turn it off. I want a connection not just some ‘fun’ so frustrating 😖
 
  • Like
Reactions: 2
See this is what I find difficult, there are men out there who haven’t met or been with women for a long long time, who wants to meet someone who is desperate for a sh*g?

I’ve just been on a walk with someone and as soon as I said something slightly cheeky he couldn’t stop from that. It my fault partly but some men don’t know when to turn it off. I want a connection not just some ‘fun’ so frustrating 😖
That is actually a good point, I just don’t see the point in dating right now. They have no other interaction bar these dates and you only know their lockdown version no idea how they behave when there is not a lockdown.
 
  • Like
Reactions: 7
Personally, I wouldn't mind something casual like that 😂

My concern is a) not really knowing them b) not being able to get to know them enough at the moment and c) a pandemic shouldn't be the time I go around casually sleeping with people 😅
 
  • Like
Reactions: 4
'Swipe to see my doggo 😍'
If I wanted a dog I'd be looking at a rescue center not Tinder, you cringe!!! 🤮
 
  • Haha
  • Like
  • Sick
Reactions: 10
What’s the point lol. I realise I wasn’t chatty back but I thought maybe he wanted to see if I would reply and then be chatty 🤣

Edited to add he matched with me.
I don’t know if I’m being really dense by this point but I don’t see a problem yet 🙈
 
  • Like
  • Haha
Reactions: 5
I don’t know if I’m being really dense by this point but I don’t see a problem yet 🙈
I could be wrong but I think the problem is what we were saying a bit earlier in the thread about having the same bone dry conversations over and over again. Even just by opening with “Hi” and nothing more I’d be irritated so I kind of get it 🤣
 
  • Like
Reactions: 4
It doesn't bother me 😬 not if it is the first few messages with a new match

If I try to engage in a proper conversation and it's dry then I give up
 
I could be wrong but I think the problem is what we were saying a bit earlier in the thread about having the same bone dry conversations over and over again. Even just by opening with “Hi” and nothing more I’d be irritated so I kind of get it 🤣
That's it! If I match with someone I do try and type out a paragraph (granted it is the same one over and over again) just to show I'm keen and trying to make an effort. What am I supposed to say to "hi"

I've typed out a long paragraph in return now and will see he how responds hahaha
 
  • Like
Reactions: 1
That's it! If I match with someone I do try and type out a paragraph (granted it is the same one over and over again) just to show I'm keen and trying to make an effort. What am I supposed to say to "hi"

I've typed out a long paragraph in return now and will see he how responds hahaha
Ok I get it now 😂
 
  • Like
Reactions: 1
Status
Thread locked. We start a new thread when they have over 1000 posts, click the blue button to see all threads for this topic and find the latest open thread.