Dating after Lockdown

Strawberry-pot · Jul 18, 2020

I thought if it was public he would

I get notifications if people who don’t follow me message me but it comes up as “message requests” but mine is private. I wouldn’t message both accounts as I think that’s too full on but I would maybe start following him?
Or maybe message him on fb?

coconochanel · Jul 18, 2020

Strawberry-pot said:
I thought if it was public he would I get notifications if people who don’t follow me message me but it comes up as “message requests” but mine is private. I wouldn’t message both accounts as I think that’s too full on but I would maybe start following him?
Or maybe message him on fb?

Yeah I don't think I'm going to message his other IG account. I don't have a FB account I only use IG.

Strawberry-pot · Jul 18, 2020

I would just follow him, everyone gets the notifications when someone follows you. If he follows you back that’s a sign

sounds so childish

do you have any mutual friends that could drop it into conversation? X

coconochanel · Jul 18, 2020

Strawberry-pot said:
I would just follow him, everyone gets the notifications when someone follows you. If he follows you back that’s a sign sounds so childish do you have any mutual friends that could drop it into conversation? X

No I dont think we do.

realhousewivewannabe · Jul 18, 2020

coconochanel said:
No I dont think we do.

Oh I didn’t know you didn’t follow him! I can’t wait to see how this works out! Keeping my fingers crossed!

coconochanel · Jul 18, 2020

pol2020 said:
Oh I didn’t know you didn’t follow him! I can’t wait to see how this works out! Keeping my fingers crossed!

Thank you, I'll keep you updated if anything happens.

Woolmercardington · Jul 18, 2020

Argghh

How utterly annoying and demoralising is it when you match with a man, who you not only find attractive, but you seem to have a great instant rapport with. Lots of flirty, verbal sparring, which I absolutely love, but which very rarely happens and then... POOF!!!

Yes, this did just happen to me

Not the first time by all means, but it it really can get lonely at times and those fun little messages can be a great pickmeup... in the end, though, you just end up feeling worse.

it’s not been changed?! · Jul 18, 2020

Woolmercardington said:
Argghh

How utterly annoying and demoralising is it when you match with a man, who you not only find attractive, but you seem to have a great instant rapport with. Lots of flirty, verbal sparring, which I absolutely love, but which very rarely happens and then... POOF!!!

Yes, this did just happen to me Not the first time by all means, but it it really can get lonely at times and those fun little messages can be a great pickmeup... in the end, though, you just end up feeling worse.

Ugh. How long had you been talking for?

Woolmercardington · Jul 18, 2020

it’s not been changed?! said:
Ugh. How long had you been talking for?

Honestly, not long, but it's just this recurring feeling of having the rug pulled from under you time and time again.

I think men like this are just able to 'click' with lots of women. I don't mean they're players as such, but if they're funny and charming as well as cute, then they're always going to be in high demand.

I think when your life is generally a dating/flirtation free zone, it always feels more frustrating when the exciting matches morph into the Invisible Man

Eyerollbrainache · Jul 19, 2020

Woolmercardington said:
Honestly, not long, but it's just this recurring feeling of having the rug pulled from under you time and time again.

I think men like this are just able to 'click' with lots of women. I don't mean they're players as such, but if they're funny and charming as well as cute, then they're always going to be in high demand.

I think when your life is generally a dating/flirtation free zone, it always feels more frustrating when the exciting matches morph into the Invisible Man

Urgh. Ghosting is the worst. I hate it, especially when your having good chat.

Bellaboo83 · Jul 19, 2020

Woolmercardington said:
Argghh

How utterly annoying and demoralising is it when you match with a man, who you not only find attractive, but you seem to have a great instant rapport with. Lots of flirty, verbal sparring, which I absolutely love, but which very rarely happens and then... POOF!!!

Yes, this did just happen to me Not the first time by all means, but it it really can get lonely at times and those fun little messages can be a great pickmeup... in the end, though, you just end up feeling worse.

Oh my god I could have wrote this myself. It must be really common. I've allowed myself to get really excited about a couple of guys and then they just vanish into thin air

. To start off with I found myself wondering what I did wrong, but now I've gained a bit of a thicker skin. Its still really frustrating though!!

Caramel Latte · Jul 19, 2020

Okay so when i met my friend on 1/1/20 we thought this was the year we got to know new people. Now we can barely have a conversation with the people we already know.
In other words, whatever social skills we had are now nowhere to be found...

it’s not been changed?! · Jul 19, 2020

On bumble I have my distance set to around 20 miles radius. If I put the radius to the whole of the country, it says 50+ people have liked me. Long distance relationships are not unusual for me, but I doubt any of these men want to follow up anything. They’re just time wasters.

Woolmercardington · Jul 19, 2020

Bellaboo83 said:
Oh my god I could have wrote this myself. It must be really common. I've allowed myself to get really excited about a couple of guys and then they just vanish into thin air . To start off with I found myself wondering what I did wrong, but now I've gained a bit of a thicker skin. Its still really frustrating though!!

Oh, it's never anything you've done. Not at all. As I said in my following post, I think these men just tend to be either very popular so have loads of options, or they have very short attention spans.

But yes, incredibly frustrating. I kick myself about getting excited about a guy, but yet it's supposed to be fun and exciting

It's like you have to keep reminding yourself to not get too excited, to not find it too enjoyable, to not get too swept up, because you'll only feel like crap when the inevitable happens.

it’s not been changed?! said:
On bumble I have my distance set to around 20 miles radius. If I put the radius to the whole of the country, it says 50+ people have liked me. Long distance relationships are not unusual for me, but I doubt any of these men want to follow up anything. They’re just time wasters.

How do you find Bumble generally? Do many matches actually reply?

it’s not been changed?! · Jul 20, 2020

Woolmercardington said:
Oh, it's never anything you've done. Not at all. As I said in my following post, I think these men just tend to be either very popular so have loads of options, or they have very short attention spans.

But yes, incredibly frustrating. I kick myself about getting excited about a guy, but yet it's supposed to be fun and exciting It's like you have to keep reminding yourself to not get too excited, to not find it too enjoyable, to not get too swept up, because you'll only feel like crap when the inevitable happens.

How do you find Bumble generally? Do many matches actually reply?

This is probably a bit cruel, but I’ll only message a bumble match if he extends the match so I have extra time to send the first message

then I feel he could be genuine.

Woolmercardington · Jul 20, 2020

it’s not been changed?! said:
This is probably a bit cruel, but I’ll only message a bumble match if he extends the match so I have extra time to send the first message then I feel he could be genuine.

Ah right, I didn't know about that feature. I never like messaging first so have always been put off Bumble.

realhousewivewannabe · Jul 20, 2020

it’s not been changed?! said:
This is probably a bit cruel, but I’ll only message a bumble match if he extends the match so I have extra time to send the first message then I feel he could be genuine.

I love that!

it’s not been changed?! · Jul 20, 2020

pol2020 said:
I love that!

It just makes more sense. If he’s keen to talk to you, he’ll give you the extra time to send a message.
However, I hate having to send the first message

Bellaboo83 · Jul 20, 2020

it’s not been changed?! said:
It just makes more sense. If he’s keen to talk to you, he’ll give you the extra time to send a message.
However, I hate having to send the first message

Haha I'd never have anyone to message if I did that

. I hate the first message thing too, but found bumble to have men who are a bit more serious about properly dating than guys on tinder, does anyone else find that?

Strawberry-pot · Jul 20, 2020

Bellaboo83 said:
Haha I'd never have anyone to message if I did that . I hate the first message thing too, but found bumble to have men who are a bit more serious about properly dating than guys on tinder, does anyone else find that?

I have heard this. I know a lot of people who have got Serious relationships from bumble and my friend from work was due to get married in sept to someone she’s been with for nearly two year thanks for bumble. I think tinder is more for hook ups nowadays.