Dating after lockdown #6 Block him!

[LaurieLaurie]

i do like attention from someone I’m with/dating don’t see the point otherwise

That’s what I meant.. Not from randoms.

 

[Wowitsme]

That’s what I meant.. Not from randoms.

I have the attention span of a goldfish so I get bored and forget about them

 

[misscl4]

I have the attention span of a goldfish so I get bored and forget about them

My eyes went blurry then and I read boned at first

 

[xxAprilxx]

Hi everyone, I've very recently ended my relationship with boyfriend of five years. Even though it was my decision, I still feel strange but also very happy and very excited for my future. We're still living together at the moment though, which isn't so great.

I've been lurking here a few weeks and was going to wait until I'd moved and ready to date again before I said hello to you all, but tonight I thought why not just say hi now I've really enjoyed reading your stories and the advice you give is fantastic. Online dating sounds just as bad as I remember it being, haha!!

 

[Wowitsme]

My eyes went blurry then and I read boned at first

Well I wouldn’t complain about that

 

[Mr Sparkle]

Hi and welcome @Jellycat99 and @xxAprilxx ! You're not alone, not by a long shot.

Just spent the evening with my sisters, at one point one of them rolled their eyes and actually uttered "The audacity of men..." - I laughed and had to tell them about this thread! What're the chances that next time we hang out, someone says "BLOCK HIM"

 

[timtams]

I really struggle to know if my red flag radar is off, like I’ve just had so many bad experiences so am I hypersensitive, or am I an expert at picking up the early signs

This guy super liked me and then started messaging last night.
Red flag number 1 = starting the conversation with a compliment and a heart eyes emoji.
Number 2 was being very general about his work (“government job”).
Number 3 profile says he is an “all round nice guy” - genuinely nice guys don’t need to say that?
Number 4 asked me what I want from tinder and then when I explain and ask what he’s after he responds with this:

Number 5 was saying he doesn’t talk to people on tinder but every now and again someone gets his attention
Number 6 not asking questions, he responded to mine telling me where he goes camping but then didn’t ask anything back. That’s not going to carry a conversation.

Ok now that I’ve written that out I should clearly just take the thread titles advice and block him!? I have plenty of other matches.

 

[LaurieLaurie]

Chasing adventures? Cringe. Is he being vague and saying what he thinks he wants you to hear? It doesn’t strike me as a natural, flowing conversation on his part. He probably a serial Tinder user.

Did you hear from your date?

 

[timtams]

Yeah I agree. It reminds me of the last guy who was “phasing out tinder” because everyone was hard work aside from me of course

And yep I heard from the other one, he said some nice things (personality related rather than appearance which was refreshing) and said he is definitely keen to catch up again. He seems like a genuinely nice person!

 

[sleepflowers]

'Chasing adventures' uggghhhhHHH why do they always try and flex how exciting their life is, who can be arsed, I'd rather lie down with a drink

 

[katyazamo]

I really struggle to know if my red flag radar is off, like I’ve just had so many bad experiences so am I hypersensitive, or am I an expert at picking up the early signs

This guy super liked me and then started messaging last night.
Red flag number 1 = starting the conversation with a compliment and a heart eyes emoji.
Number 2 was being very general about his work (“government job”).
Number 3 profile says he is an “all round nice guy” - genuinely nice guys don’t need to say that?
Number 4 asked me what I want from tinder and then when I explain and ask what he’s after he responds with this:
View attachment 675295
Number 5 was saying he doesn’t talk to people on tinder but every now and again someone gets his attention
Number 6 not asking questions, he responded to mine telling me where he goes camping but then didn’t ask anything back. That’s not going to carry a conversation.

Ok now that I’ve written that out I should clearly just take the thread titles advice and block him!? I have plenty of other matches.

Oh I couldn't be assed with that already. Especially the message about how he "doesn't really talk to people on here", but here he is on tinder so...?! Guys like this really think they're something special and we should feel honoured they've decided to reply to us, when the reality is he's boring and can't hold a conversation

 

[Bettyboo2021]

I’m with you all re: the constant compliments about looks etc before you’ve even met. I don’t get why they send “hey gorgeous” texts, put us on a sky- high pedestal then to dismiss and discard us. I think it’s really bleeping illogical how one minute you’re everything someone wants the next you Cease to exist I will marry the man who One day says “what I know of you so far is awesome, maybe you have bad points but I want to stick around and consistently date you to find out what they are” I don’t care if he looks like dean Gaffney I WILL marry him

 

[yankydoo]

How true is this hahaha

 

[timtams]

Yesss I just saw that!!! That would so be me. At this stage I’m not holding out much hope of getting to wedding stage ever though haha

 

[Ensay]

I think lockdown has made me more independent to a degree. I've been single a while and don't mind it; I quite like the freedom in deciding what I want to do and when. Not that I was ever forced to do anything when with my last partner, but I sometimes felt like I should do certain things - given that relationships are two way.

I may decide to get back into the dating game soon, though!

 

[Bagpuss7]

Newbie here posting for first time...

Just wondering how you all deal with the zombies ...the ones that ghost for a few days/ a week or 2, after speaking daily for a period of time, who then reappear like nothing has happened?

 

[misscl4]

I’m with you all re: the constant compliments about looks etc before you’ve even met. I don’t get why they send “hey gorgeous” texts, put us on a sky- high pedestal then to dismiss and discard us. I think it’s really bleeping illogical how one minute you’re everything someone wants the next you Cease to exist I will marry the man who One day says “what I know of you so far is awesome, maybe you have bad points but I want to stick around and consistently date you to find out what they are” I don’t care if he looks like dean Gaffney I WILL marry him

So so true, makes me feel very uncomfortable if we haven’t even had a video call!

 

[ThreeSteaksPam]

Newbie here posting for first time...

Just wondering how you all deal with the zombies ...the ones that ghost for a few days/ a week or 2, after speaking daily for a period of time, who then reappear like nothing has happened?

I completely disengage with those people and don’t pick the conversations back up again when they re-emerge. My assumption (rightly or wrongly) is that their attention has been on someone else and they’ve “benched” you to pick back up again if things don’t work out with option A. You’d just be constantly waiting for it to happen again.

Or, you know, their Nan has died… 🥱

 

[square_spoon]

Newbie here posting for first time...

Just wondering how you all deal with the zombies ...the ones that ghost for a few days/ a week or 2, after speaking daily for a period of time, who then reappear like nothing has happened?

It varies for me based on how much I like them at the time but I mostly ignore them!

 

[misscl4]

I have now decided anyone who looks even slightly like they care too much about their looks/pretty boy/man is a swipe left. Past has told me those are not the good uns. Probably took me far too long to realise.