Dating after lockdown #20 I’m done. Too late to become a nun?

[moosesauna]

Yeah I feel the same, and when you do start seeing them more in person it doesn’t matter so much, but in the early stages I feel it does. Like a good morning text, good night etc. People may have held things down without phones but phones play a big part in people’s lives now. Yes leave him to text you tomorrow which I’m sure he will. All my previous partners or even just people I’ve spoken to have generally been good texters so I’d find it hard to adjust to someone who wasn’t I think. I was texting a guy at the start of joining these threads who literally sent me one text a day. For about 2 weeks. I couldn’t cope with it lol and like u say the convo has died by the time they reply!

Yup, even partners who've been casual have made the time to say hello or ask how I was through the day. Especially when I had exams or was going through a difficult time, it was wonderful to have a short text expressing their sympathy or best wishes! Goes a long way, and its something I've always done for partners too.

I’m actually in the process of setting up a book club for single women because I’m over it all.

I had dinner with a few couples yesterday, and whilst it was lovely I’m getting rather tired of the idea that you’re somehow not good enough / not normal simply because you can’t seem to find a suitable partner.

All my friends are moving forward towards marriage and babies and it’s making me realise I want to spend more time with likeminded people.

I am still on the apps, but I’m not going to let my life revolve around finding the right person. Dating is too exhausting to be thinking of all day every day. It’s so time consuming and nerve wracking.

If it helps, there's a chance half of those marriages will end in divorce - or just a very unhappy couple. So many people still rush into settling down before they've even had a chance to discover their own wants and desires!! I've talked to a lot of people aged 50+ and most have regretted parts of, or their whole marriage. One even said that they got married at 21 (my age, terrifying) to the first woman they set eyes on, and later had this extreme urge to explore their sexuality. Married people also lose a lot of their friends or face a sort of emptiness that comes from seemingly having it all, and yet not being happy. Loneliness within a couple hurts far, far more than singledom.

@Bagpuss7 I have shared this before but I went on a date with someone and he said "You're not bad looking but your arse is too flat & your lips are too thin". I mean ... If that doesn't sum up rude, entitled, immature, asshole I don't know what does!?

Maybe thought I'd be a Kardashian clone.

Oh god, not the negging (puke emoji). Gross!! Good thing he admitted he was a silly twit before you had the misfortune of sleeping with him :O

 

[al255]

Sorry @Jadejones9596 ..did you not ask him why he couldn’t get a 15 min train journey to meet you? So flakey.

 

[Jadejones9596]

Sorry @Jadejones9596 ..did you not ask him why he couldn’t get a 15 min train journey to meet you? So flakey.

Nope, to be honest I didn't want to hear anything else he had to say, I just said OK right well we are done here and told him to do one he just said its hard getting here. He couldn't be arsed if you ask me. Hilarious as yesterday he was asking what we should dress as for Halloween

 

[al255]

Nope, to be honest I didn't want to hear anything else he had to say, I just said OK right well we are done here and told him to do one he just said its hard getting here. He couldn't be arsed if you ask me. Hilarious as yesterday he was asking what we should dress as for Halloween

what the actual duck? Men are SO bizarre and sounds like he just says tit for the sake of it.

Meanwhile Thursday date man hasn’t bothered to message me all day, M thanked me for booking our table for Thursday night (I thought I’d make the effort and book it seeing as he’s busy at work all day) and I just think how nice. It’s how you should be treated. He said “thank you, looking forward to it” bla bla bla. From what I gather his ex treated him horribly!! Have I got high hopes for this? Yes!! Buttttttt not getting my hopes too up atm

 

[Jadejones9596]

what the actual duck? Men are SO bizarre and sounds like he just says tit for the sake of it.

Meanwhile Thursday date man hasn’t bothered to message me all day, M thanked me for booking our table for Thursday night (I thought I’d make the effort and book it seeing as he’s busy at work all day) and I just think how nice. It’s how you should be treated. He said “thank you, looking forward to it” bla bla bla. From what I gather his ex treated him horribly!! Have I got high hopes for this? Yes!! Buttttttt not getting my hopes too up atm

He's a complicated fella and lord knows I don't need that! Ahhhh excited for you

 

[Jmx]

what the actual duck? Men are SO bizarre and sounds like he just says tit for the sake of it.

Meanwhile Thursday date man hasn’t bothered to message me all day, M thanked me for booking our table for Thursday night (I thought I’d make the effort and book it seeing as he’s busy at work all day) and I just think how nice. It’s how you should be treated. He said “thank you, looking forward to it” bla bla bla. From what I gather his ex treated him horribly!! Have I got high hopes for this? Yes!! Buttttttt not getting my hopes too up atm

Oh I think you’ve set the bar low if you’re buzzing about him saying thank you?!

 

[Clickbait]

Oh I think you’ve set the bar low if you’re buzzing about him saying thank you?!

It’s good to recognise positive behaviours you’d want in a potential partner. Saying that it is a sad state of affairs that a man saying thank you is seen as a green flag when it should be commonplace!

I think the OP’s position is also that she’s getting a better quality and level of interaction from this guy to the other one as well.

 

[Bagpuss7]

It’s good to recognise positive behaviours you’d want in a potential partner. Saying that it is a sad state of affairs that a man saying thank you is seen as a green flag when it should be commonplace!

I think the OP’s position is also that she’s getting a better quality and level of interaction from this guy to the other one as well.

That's how I read it too...the other guy is making zero effort whereas this one appears to be more engaged. I do agree however that we shouldn't be thanking them and being thrilled when they show us common courtesy

 

[al255]

Oh I think you’ve set the bar low if you’re buzzing about him saying thank you?!

it’s cos all the men I’ve seen in the past didn’t bother saying thanks for anything so I’m more shocked there’s a man out there who can thank a lady for booking a table! Just shows how awful my past lovers/exs have been.. and how low I really was dating. Wow. Anyway onwards and upwards from here

 

[EasterEggs]

Sorry to change the subject, but which apps do you have most success on? I’ve been on Bumble for a few weeks now and can’t even find anyone good to swipe for!

I think Hinge would be good but I don’t have enough pics

 

[DollyDiamondxo]

Aww feeling the love on here today love this thread sooo I may be naive but I wasn’t aware until today (while browsing another thread) that there’s actual hook up apps? We’re people just sign up to find someone to have sex with? Correct me if I’m wrong but why aren’t these seedy men after one thing on that instead of the dating apps! There’s literally a niche market for them and their still on apps made for finding dates and relationships! What’s their excuse lol

 

[Thank(space)you]

Aww feeling the love on here today love this thread sooo I may be naive but I wasn’t aware until today (while browsing another thread) that there’s actual hook up apps? We’re people just sign up to find someone to have sex with? Correct me if I’m wrong but why aren’t these seedy men after one thing on that instead of the dating apps! There’s literally a niche market for them and their still on apps made for finding dates and relationships! What’s their excuse lol

Yes, feeld, fab &fet are the main hook up apps I've heard of. Tinder used to be just for hook ups but has changed

 

[DollyDiamondxo]

Nope, to be honest I didn't want to hear anything else he had to say, I just said OK right well we are done here and told him to do one he just said its hard getting here. He couldn't be arsed if you ask me. Hilarious as yesterday he was asking what we should dress as for Halloween

Hope your ok girl he doesn’t need to bother dressing up for Halloween, he’s already a clown by the sounds of it. You deserve better! Good on you for not just saying ok we will rearrange. Makes me laugh thei think we will wait on the sidelines until they have some free time to slot us in. Not on our watches

Yes, feeld, fab &fet are the main hook up apps I've heard of. Tinder used to be just for hook ups but has changed

Well these seedy ones who think it’s ok to be sexual from the off need to be sent the direction of those apps! Yeah tinder has evolved I guess. Dating should mean exactly that - going on dates. Not seedy stuff and I’m no prude lol

 

[Jadejones9596]

Hope your ok girl he doesn’t need to bother dressing up for Halloween, he’s already a clown by the sounds of it. You deserve better! Good on you for not just saying ok we will rearrange. Makes me laugh thei think we will wait on the sidelines until they have some free time to slot us in. Not on our watches


Well these seedy ones who think it’s ok to be sexual from the off need to be sent the direction of those apps! Yeah tinder has evolved I guess. Dating should mean exactly that - going on dates. Not seedy stuff and I’m no prude lol

Omg Dolly you officially win the day for the Halloween comment, that is bloody perfect! Do you know what I'm actually really ok. I'm so proud of how well I'm dealing with it and feel very empowered by all the love and support I've received! It's all good actually, im definitely thinking I'm happier without men right now xx

 

[DollyDiamondxo]

Omg Dolly you officially win the day for the Halloween comment, that is bloody perfect! Do you know what I'm actually really ok. I'm so proud of how well I'm dealing with it and feel very empowered by all the love and support I've received! It's all good actually, im definitely thinking I'm happier without men right now xx

Lol thanks but it’s true! Yeah guess it’s always better at first than them to seem nice at first then abit in turn distant and start flaking. Yes you done good, it’s really his loss. This thread is so supportive

 

[Agent Cooper]

What an idiot that guy is @Jadejones9596! I hope you are not too upset and spend a nice day without this clown.

Sorry to change the subject, but which apps do you have most success on? I’ve been on Bumble for a few weeks now and can’t even find anyone good to swipe for!

I think Hinge would be good but I don’t have enough pics

I actually thought Bumble was decent compared to Tinder. Tinder is mostly used as a hook up app from what I’ve seen…but then these experiences can be very different depending on where you live and the age range you choose.

 

[al255]

Tinder for me is awful. Just men who want a one night stand or FWB

Hinge is OK, I met M on there but a lot have matched and haven’t really spoke back

Bumble in my area is full of men who don’t talk and pointless matching, on par with tinder really

 

[HitchhikingGhost]

I had most success with Tinder. Had a 4 year relationship and now currently just hit the one year mark with the last guy I met on there (I still like to read this thread though)

Bumble, I found that no one replied and Hinge was a bit meh

 

[DollyDiamondxo]

I had most success with Tinder. Had a 4 year relationship and now currently just hit the one year mark with the last guy I met on there (I still like to read this thread though)

Bumble, I found that no one replied and Hinge was a bit meh

It’s just luck of the draw on them all. You get the same thing from them all (seedy comments, the no messagers etc) and the odd relationships come of them like yours and others. Happy anniversary to you two lol I’m off all apps but if I don’t meet someone impromptu after summer I’ll be back on them no doubt lol

 

[dreamteam1]

Worst date in one line go…
Forgot his wallet and had to drive him