Dating after lockdown #13 Halloween the ghost(er)s favourite season 🎃

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Clementine

Clementine

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Because he was abusive in texts etc. so I had a separate phone/email etc. for him to contact me, it was a way of maintaining boundaries. I’ve only just unblocked him after a year on my main phone (I sound like a drug dealer!) as things had been consistently settled.
 
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J

Jmx

Chatty Member
Thank(space)you said:
Make this the last time. You deserve so much more. Have a look inside, why do you keep going back? Do you value yourself?
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He’s major gaslighting me and denying that everything I’ve seen was him. I do deserve much better than this, it’s just horrible because I can’t help feeling like it’s my fault/ I’m not good enough.
 
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NoseyNiamh

VIP Member
Shinyhappy said:
Ok, hello - first time posting on this thread but want some outsiders opinions/advice please!
Met a guy online a couple of months back, instantly hit it off texting/calling constantly etc. Met him after a week of chatting and really got on, very attracted to each other, conversation flows and completely comfortable with him & he expressed the same feelings to me. A couple of weeks after meeting he tells me that his ex has turned up after living abroad for the last year (this was the reason for their split & it was their plan to get back together on her return but they ended up deciding to cut communication instead & he changed his number). So he’s been avoiding her since knowing she’s home (she lives local to him).
I’ve told him he needs to meet up with her and work out what he wants long term (getting back with her or not) so that I know where I stand as we get on so well and have developed feelings for each other. At first I thought he was stringing me along but the more time we spend together and the more effort he puts in the more I’m holding out hope with him. He lives an hour away from me and will drive down at least 3 times a week to see me even for an hour or 2 (I have young children so my free time is very limited)
I don’t want to nag him on the issue but also am keen to know where I stand now as I can’t pre plan or look forward to anything with him due to this hanging over us. We’ve tried not speaking to each other a couple of times as I am finding it difficult not knowing what’s going to happen but we ultimately can’t keep away from each other.
I’d like to add I was completely happy being single and didn’t want to date, I didn’t meet him on a dating site but somehow ended up on a date with him anyway! - oops!!
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I'm a bit confused reading this. What is the issue? Has he said he definitely wants to be with her but is avoiding her in case they do get back together.
 
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ATV2021

ATV2021

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Thank(space)you said:
I did indeed 😜 I keep wondering who you are when I look through the comments haha
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Hahaha there's so many commenting! I wasn't brave enough to show me in it so it's just my actual underwear which I then had to change out of and put my super sexy sports bra on for boxing 🤣🤣 I am gutted that it got cancelled tonight. I wonder if I've commented on your photo without realising lol
 
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BunnyLebowski

BunnyLebowski

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NoseyNiamh said:
I have some serious issues. As soon as a man starts acting like that, I'm out of there 😭😭😭


What was he apologising for ?
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Usually I would have serious issues too. But this bloke D is like 6’4 and so manly it’s unreal. Defo not A feathery stroker. 💕💕
 
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Sheabutter

Sheabutter

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I would make the effort to start seeing someone else as it’s clearly not exclusive. Leave some doors open for yourself. I hate high octane emotional situations, so I would avoid giving ultimatums and pushing for anything.
 
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nobrains

nobrains

Well-known member
BunnyLebowski said:
That was great advice and you have a good plan there. You are defo not a slapper…..I’m jealous 😂.

I have a date tonight. We have FaceTimed so I know he’s legit. He’s driving 1 and a half hours to meet me and he’s not drinking. I said….that’s a hell of a lot of effort for not much fun. He said, if we get on we can arrange drinks another time.
He‘s very attractive but he’s 54 so he might be desperate!
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Honestly before him I had had one sexual partner. Then with my ex I didn't have sex for a year and now in less than a week I've become some kind of sexual vixen! Honestly it's fucking amazing the connection we have. You know when you are just near someone and you can feel it?

TMI but we went for a walk and explored some bunkers and the tension when we where in there 😅


I'm sure you are a gorgeous woman! If he was desperate he could find someone more local? Just see how it goes. Good luck! I hope you have a wonderful time 🙂
 
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P

Pixipoppy

VIP Member
Delihla said:
Yip really 😂 I think it’s the way he’s phrased it that sounds presumptuous, he should have asked for mine and then I could chose whether to give it or not! This shifts the dynamic for me.
I generally don’t want my WhatsApp being blown up by guys I haven’t met or don’t have a set date with though 💁🏻‍♀️
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No fair enough, I actually usually am the one to offer my number pretty quickly 😅 But yes it is slightly annoying when you then decide you don’t actually want to meet them and have to delete/block a load of people! Has happened to me a couple times already so maybe I need to start being a bit more discerning.
 
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R

radoxdetox

Well-known member
HelloStereo said:
Someone who is spontaneous? Haha maybe dating has not jaded me so much yet but I always try to give the benefit of the doubt to people who use these sorts of phrases 🤣
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No you’re right, I am just can’t be bothered to wait to find out now 🤣
 
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nobrains

nobrains

Well-known member
I've been a lurker for ages. I've gotten out of a long term relationship that was bad for a long time. Anyway met a guy on Tinder and we really got along,spoke for 3 days and then had a late night and impromptu meet up last Wednesday and had sex. We then met up Saturday and slept together again and Sunday we went for a walk,had lunch out together and the inevitable sex. Do I sound like a slapper?

We get on so well. Have loads in common. Like freakishly so 😅 the only problem is it feels like I'm always the one that instigates seeing eachother because the sex is off the scale good 😜 Do you guys think I should let him ask first? (To be fair to him,he did as about Sunday) I find myself holding back from making plans with friends because I want to see him but think it would be good to make him think I'm not bothered?
 
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