TLDR version of what follows: My mum's in care. I'm in charge of her finances and could never exploit her but I know it happens.
This infuriates me. My mum's in a care home. She doesn't have dementia but has cognitive issues so I have full LPA and am in total control of her finances. She's far from loaded but is 'comfortable'. Had to sell her house to pay for her full care and now it gets topped up by the local Council because she's just under the threshold and is allowed some 'help'. I could run riot with her remaining finances as I am unable to work (except for volunteering) due to health problems and am on a low income. Couldn't live with myself if I did. The problem I have is trying to get her to spend money on herself, as she has this phobia of being penniless. She comes from a generation of people who paid their way and, except for a mortgage, never bought anything on credit. She paid her taxes and earned her small pensions. Although she has left anything that remains to me, as her only child, I won't touch it. While she is alive, it's HER money to do whatever she wants with. I want her to enjoy some luxuries because the last 2 decades of her life have been tit. She nearly died a month ago but fought back and I still have her. That's worth more to me than anything she could give me, materially. There have been people in mum's care home in similar situations to the one you describe and it boils my piss. My mum and dad slogged their guts off in relatively low paid jobs to ensure they'd have a comfortable retirement. My dad never lived to enjoy it. Safeguarding my 'inheritance' pales into nothing when compared with ensuring my mum's quality of life. She has all her material needs met- good food, more than enough clothes, sundries and a decent enough room. I buy her little luxuries. She has never been into fancy jewellery or expensive goods and wouldn't thank me for them. The best thing I could do for her, with her money, is a nice holiday somewhere but sadly she's not been well enough over the last few years (long COVID included). Not saying she is but if Daniella is hanging round her dad because she's on her uppers and needs a bung- financially or publicity-wise, it's shameful.
ETA: The one thing my mum does let me spend her money on is taking her to the haIrdressers and having a decent hairdo. Today, a little miracle happened and I was buzzing. Just over a month ago, she was writhing round in agony, in A & E, close to death. It didn't look good as she has multiple health issues. It was touch and go. They risked putting in a pacemaker for her heart and, today, I walked her into the salon to get her barnet coiffed up. She hadn't been in months. I was close to tears, seeing her getting the treatment. She even put her teeth in for the occasion! Never thought it would be possible. Can't put a price on that. Sorry for the long post...it just meant so much, had to share it!