DansBarmyArmy
VIP Member
Sorry Spongranch, I think you just dropped your mic as you exited the room....Dear Dan
I know you are reading, as you did try to modify your behaviour by not trying to headbutt the camera whilst saying your catchphrase, after a comment this week on TT. You see you can push that rage and fear downward so it doesn't make you look like a badly operated animatronic.
With that in mind, let's look at your attempts to recruit a psychologist and how this might go.
You might be aware of this and just in denial, but your company brand and personal brand is tarnished at best and toxic to the majority. No organisation has spewed forth that much nonsense, paid so few taxes, flip-flopped direction so much and survived. Your brand is now as fresh and appealing as a warm can of condensed milk left open in the midday sun.
It is not coming back, both your brand and the company closely match the " decline" phase seen in many products and services. You are now like a VHS video recorder, Sinclair C5, or fidget spinner. You know the score, the marketing basics " growth, maturity and then decline", except I would have to challenge your maturity stage in terms of product, service and your own cognitive ability which is more " Beavis and Butt Head" than a rising entrepreneur.
You are no longer able to recruit the best, as the best will read this and many other posts, before running for the hills!
If anyone was really good as a psychologist it will be a problem for you. You know that problem you have when people know more than you and the Dunning Kruger inside you feels like you are a little boy back at school being lectured by a nasty teacher. You struggle with others unless you are the font of all knowledge in the room. That struggle will manifest itself in undermining behaviour, vulgar adolescent jokes ( which you pass off as being direct) and suppressed rage. You will argue with them, blame them, they will leave and you will make a " poor me" video about it.
This is the David Van Day time of your career. Not appearing on Top of the Pops all cheekbones and nice hair, but the bit where you push a burger trolley around Brighton searching for a few quid, whilst stealing songs from Buck Fizz! Apologies to burger sellers everywhere!
Back to the psychology recruit. A " psychologist" is not a protected title, unlike "clinical psychologist" or " occupational psychologist", so you can find anyone with a two-hour course in Crystal Healing, Google Searching, NLP, water divining, tarot card reading, and pass them off as a psychologist. I am not knocking crystal healing, but it will not fit into the " 10 years of nutritional science" culture that you push with your googling skills and pseudoscience sound bites. Or maybe it will?
You should be looking for a BPS or APA member as a minimum but again, they are going to do their own research and probably run away when they find out what they are getting into.
Finally, I can't help myself, you mentioned on a TT that fad diets damaged your ability to produce testosterone.
Happy to be corrected but I thought treating yourself like a pin cushion for every variation of steroid available to create a fake/unsustainable body image caused you the problem. I could not find " steroid abuse" listed under " fad diet" anywhere in my extensive nutritional science research, you may know more than me as you have been googling for 10 years and I have only googled for 10 minutes.
A fad diet or eating plan is claimed to be one without "robust scientific evidence to support any claims", so can you remind us all which university or scientific body did you submit your leading-edge system/plan to? Is your plan evidence-based and peer-reviewed or cooked up in a backroom or motorhome like a Walter White crystal meth lab?
If you are the new psychologist in a few weeks time idly going through tattle messages, please read the following, no one will notice as Dan is probably talking about himself or sex or both.
Are you finding yourself sitting in a garage or living room with three others that possess the intellect, wit, and ability of three turnips in a field?
I can only suggest you mention you have left your laptop charger in the car, get yourself outside, hit the gas and get away as quickly as you can. HMRC, Action Fraud, the ASA and more are coming over the hill, and its best to leave the turnips to their last stand before a metaphorical cover is placed over the turnips and their webcams, just like you would place one over the cage of a noisy irritating budgie.
Thanks, Dan, now I know what the Urban Dictionary from 2013 says about " wheeler", " wheelered" I see has been added for 2021, second definition down.
"The dawning realization that you have been in the presence of a " wheeler", similar to "wheeler dealered" or "wheelering". Wheelered is the lasting feeling of being conned by a fake who has the audacity and stupidity to tell you that it has happened.Urban Dictionary: Wheelered
A further colloquial rhyming extraction from the word "sheila" which means girl or woman.www.urbandictionary.com
Zak: What is wrong with you ?
Alex: I have been wheelered, he has changed my life
Zak: For the better, in a good way?
Alex: No, not in a good way. I was promised so much and go so little, I truly feel wheelered., but that wheeler will not do it again."
Dan your catchphrase simply says to most of us terrible, tarnished and tired. Get some help, stop the madness as it damages others.
That, my friend is a work of art.
I bow down to your greatness.
Although I couldn't resist a little song whilst reading...
Who's that coming over the hill, is it the Tax Man? 
)
