That's horrible, I'm sorry. The feeling is so much worse when it's in your gut too. Are you still communicating about this with him? You posted this a couple of weeks ago now so I hope youre doing better and are getting some sleep!!
Thanks love - it's ironic that you posted this because we've had a barny about this tonight haha.
He shared something with me about himself that explains the distance but whenever I check in to see how that thing's affecting him, he gets all awkward and downplays it - he's embarrassed but I've tried explaining that this thing has made me feel insecure and I need to be able to talk to/ask him about it.
I repeated the exact terminology he's used in the past and he's straight up gaslighted me, denying the seriousness of this thing and now I feel even more hurt and anxious. I hate that he can't own the
tit he says - regardless of how awkward it is.
I've forced him into therapy and he seems to be loving it but he won't do therapy with me. I do feel like having someone who can moderate our difficult conversations would make all the difference...
Sleep has been better though!