Recap CMB as per tattle rules:
Colour Me Bootiful aka Antonia/Toni
Make up artist from Derry, owner of “The parlour” beauty salon.
Wife of perfect Paul, her long suffering slave who seems to do everything for her except wash her.
Mother of two children whose lives are inappropriately over shared on social media.
Had weight loss surgery a few ears ago which made her a better person
Became embroiled in a scandal of her own making when text messages she had sent, slagging off brides, clients and colleagues were leaked over social media around November 2019. Initially denied all involvement, claiming they were malicious and fake but eventually threw a pity party admitting involvement but used every excuse under the sun to minimise her responsibility for her own behaviour. (It was before the weight loss surgery which transformed her body and personality after all.) Tiny tears had competition!
Swore she was leaving Derry, going off social media etc etc.
However, cue 2020, breast reduction surgery and big comeback to Derry and social media! A sigh of relief was heard for miles around!!!
2020 brought inspirational quotes galore and complete self exoneration by Toni.
During lockdown she has bestowed her gag inducing lack of culinary skills on her followers. Galavanted around IKEA, The Range, Homesense and all other non essential shops for her essential purchases which include fake plants and grass, garden furniture and room spray to disguise her unwashed sheets.
Preached to the masses about following rules as she has vulnerable family members whilst breaking every rule there was.
Can’t spell to save herself and doesn’t speak English that well either.
Hypocrisy and irony are completely lost on her but she loves a motivational/inspirational quote depicting the opposite of what she actually does
Weighs in on politics and social issues around the world - particularly America - despite being completely uneducated on facts of the matter.
Openly admitted on social media to not washing her hair for weeks on end and to not washing her face for a week
Is completely incapable of performing any basic household task and almost had a breakdown when her husband contracted Covid and she had to look after her own weins and keep the house running. Perfect Paul had to leave his sick bed to save the day! Tears and snotters all over the ‘gram!
Has “designed” and “created” her own makeup brush and makeup line which is nothing but Ali express tat with a horrendous markup - packaged in her own house and sold in a department store in Donegal
Uses the main bathroom in her house to store thousands of pounds worth of unworn clothes in bin bags and sells expired makeup on depop.
Loves a cry in front of the camera - a la Betty Davis, swears like a trooper and doesn’t read tattle
Anything else? She really keeps us haters entertained. The gift that keeps on giving is our Toni.