Cleaning with Mario #79 Story time with Martin. Once upon a 876 dots of doom…

[DramaQueen79]

Ma lovelies.

I know noo it's Wintum youse will all be getting ready fae Christmas.

So...

1. Don't forget ya £9 tree fae Argos in your bedroom

Mare importantly

2. Get yoursel 3 x plastic wine glasses (different heights) & pop them on your bespoke radiator cover that you Klarna'ed so aye

Why he needed a tree in his bedroom is beyond me, all he has to do is leave the bedroom door open and he can see the candy cane monstrosity

 

[TheGoblinKing]

Aww I'm loving that wee letterbox he can hide his wee letters from the debt collectors in so aye xx

 

[Madge2022]

The knitted bumhole must appear in the next thread title.

Thread title suggestion:

Martin huz nae self control, spending the petty cash oan a knitted bumhole.

 

[OhhBacon]

Fixed it for him.
#bespoke

 

[teatwo]

His fucking eyesight

 

[Lim1947]

The 80cm candy cane lame postbox is taller than the two hobbits I can picture the 2 of them trying to jump up to post their santa letters! He's a fucking pleb

 

[menopausalmargrit]

Why does he always post through the week like we are down the trenches in war? “We got this”, got what? Maybe if he got a job he liked and done something in his free time he would stop wishing his life away?

Anyway ma lovelies, taking my Maw to London this weekend. Been booked for last 10 months and just happened to be Lizzie’s funeral so now my Maw wants to lay flowers in Green Park… I’ll need to have several mimosas for breakfast.

 

[TheGoblinKing]

Ma lovelies, his teeth are drifting apart faster than the glaciers in the north pole so aye

 

[hopethishelpsallthebest]

Can you imagine that fat little Pygmy swinging aroond a pole at the Paisley Palais? He’d have the ceiling doon!

Imagine that lard arse dancing in a pair of arseless chaps. He'll slut drop and there'll be shit everywhere. Like a melted snickers up his fat back.

 

[Madge2022]

Shoes off?! what’s he do cartwheels on the dance floor?

This is Martin caught dancing in B and M car park when Shania came oan.

 

[menopausalmargrit]

Candy Cane bedding and a red letter box for letters to Santa, I can’t! He’s off his fucking rocker!!!

 

[menopausalmargrit]

On the day the queen leaves her scottish residency for the final time Shartin Martin the Scottish influencer posts his cleaning haul and talks about his dirty washing. What a fucking guy… I have no other words today……

I reckon wee Deek has “fired his canon” this morning and that’s why Marions got a spring in his step.

 

[DollyTheLamb]

Army my arse!!!!! He’s a fucking munchkin
EBay £2.99 ma lovlies

 

[Madge2022]

A personally wouldnae huv an animal in that wee flat. Place must be honkin eh jobbies

Yer right, don't ken how Rayn puts up wi the stench oaf wee Deek and Martin's jobbies.

If she wuz a canary she'd be deid by noo wi the fumes and nae debates.

 

[Freefalling]

I hope Rayne tries to jump on that postbox and it falls into candy cane lane like a scene out of national lampoon's im here for the drama but seriously Maz, give yourself a shake hen, ffs, you're an almost 40 year old man. Bin the shite and live a little, so much for NY at Xmas, its never ever going to happen. More chance of santa squeezing down his non existent chimney and ringing their believe bells. What a fucking

 

[Sloppys]

That’s where my cups live Maz, in the cupboard like a normal fucking person. How much more clutter does he need in the bedsit?

 

[Whenthelightsturntostars]

Treatit hisself for the wiki

£8.50 on candy cane shite and "fxxk knows what I'm using it for." - no ma quote.

P.s.note the junk hidden above and at the side of the wardrobe

P.p.s. We know you're reading here, Chickenpox. Just because something was cheap, doesn't justify how wasteful you are.

 

[Lim1947]

Fuckin slow malone with his oils, is the hinch thumbs up a new annoying trait he's going to start? He's extra irritating lately.

 

[menopausalmargrit]

He is absolutely repulsive!!!

Last day in London with my Maw. I have made more memories in four days in London than he has made his whole life. Quite sad really.

 

[TrashPanda69]

As someone with pets (dogs that are allowed outside through my patio door to my multi level garden - smell the wealth and then the coffee beans) I absolutely HATE having anything out in my kitchen for fear of it getting covered in fur. And I'm not a cleaning influencer that's not an influencer. How he can have all these 'stations' is beyond me! But then again, when your cupboards are rammed with shite what choice do you have