Absolutely thousands 
ffs MAZ
ffs MAZ
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Hunners and thousands of DMS have flooded his inbox and ootbox and backbox hens...so aye spine bright
He doesn’t even try and make it believable
Is he gonna find a dm from Hinch to meet up oan her latest jurnee to Glasgow and claim he missed out coz his ootbox wisnae delivering dms
I bet they're demands for credit card/provident loans/catalogues payment before Xmas
99% oh them are fae his second Insta account and the other 1% are fae that mad lassie that comments oan aw his posts. It will take him aw day tae trawl through 15 posts oh ‘
’. So aye.
Now ma lovelie, as youse all know Derek deals with his ootbox, and so everything is Derek's fault.
Stop writing urself messages ya freak
So how did he know hunners of his lovelies were going oot to Poundland on Sunday afternoon to buy his 600th Christmas mug if his DM’s were down?!
He's such an idiot.
And even if they were genuine there's a reason why they're called private message's you attention seeker.
*Note to self* Tell Mario nothing because he can't keep his trap shut
I bet that's why he hates January because the payments are dueI bet they're demands for credit card/provident loans/catalogues payment before Xmas
I'm sorry but these people need help, if these are genuine, then why on earth do they feel the need to message an aging bald liar any of this? It's very strange. I don't believe them to be genuine though, I think they are from Mazda to himself and he has done it so it looks like people look up to him and he is relevant etc. Get a bloody life mcbaldy culkin. Hinch didn't wanna see you, your Scottish mate with the wee lassie hates your guts and you are in debt up to your eyeballs to pay off all your candy cane shite.. you are fooling nobody SO AYE
I was facially mauled by our dog. What. Erm...
That was 100% him trying to type “proper”because nobody writes like that unless it’s a bleeping essay
absolute idiotbleeping hell. If I’d had a week like that I wouldn’t be sending that little bleep messages. I’d be on the blower to the Samaritans
He know we would have been on to him with his 50 million exclamation marks, he has obviously typed these up during his hinch meltdown. Probably took a week to spell check themThat was 100% him trying to type “proper”because nobody writes like that unless it’s a bleeping essay
They seem to have covered every base haven't they, one person lost their job but has now gone back to university, one was mauled by a dog (not mentioned if it was nikita) and had surgery, the other struggled with Christmas but thanks to santa clause of paisley he has helped these people?? BULLSHIT Aye but the one at college says they're going to persevere but they're going to give up. Wtf does that mean??He know we would have been on to him with his 50 million exclamation marks, he has obviously typed these up during his hinch meltdown. Probably took a week to spell check them
Deffo one of Mazda's riddles isn't it
She’s going to persevere but she’s also going to give up? Make it make sense
I thought you needed a basic grasp of English for uni ma luvlyDefinitely a student at the ‘University ah life’ followed by a full time position oh ‘full time yummy mummy’.She’s going to persevere but she’s also going to give up? Make it make sense
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