Cleaning with Mario #42 Autumless Autumn Jurney

[Babybail93]

Ok so the slippers - you get to keep them when you stay in hotels like this (smell the wealth) cos no one wants to wear recycled slippers that someone else’s trotter have been in.

But most folk just leave them because they’re Chinese mass produced shite. But no oor Maz, he’ll be living on the Dakota content for eons to come, through his manky cheap freebie slippers. So aye and so forth ma lovelies

The bottoms are like an ice cream wafer aren’t they? He’ll be wearing them now until they climb in the bin themselves. So aye

 

[SuzyE]

I can't believe Derek just left them and got the train home. What an ignorant little arse he is. I'm convinced he's a can short of a 6 pack anyway if I'm honest

And what's so funny that a flat tyre has Maz in fake hysterics. You can tell he doesn't get out much.

Bet Hannah doesn't get back in a while after this weekend fail

 

[menopausalmargrit]

CHEEKY TOASTIE FOR SUPPER?! I’m done my lovelies!!!

 

[Runforestrun]

Is it just my phone screen but I can’t see any difference between the colour of his ‘tanned’ feet or his untanned legs???

 

[telltaletitt]

Nae danger he’s back in the room and in his jammies for ten like fkn clockwork Mazda like fkin clockwork

 

[Dawn Dayn]

He's treatit us this dayn of dawn. He's been in a car, is thrilled that hotels have hoosecoats that don't smell of cat. He's so easily pleased. Doesn't even know its commonly called a minibar, not a little fridge. Remember when he had a mini fridge for two days, on top of his makeup table thing.

 

[OhhBacon]

That pampas grass birthday display. Reminds me of something my nan had in the 80s in her kitchen

The strangest birthday celebration decorations I have ever seen. I have no words.

 

[LennyBriscoe]

Ah my god, someone has painted a picture of Mario on a wall in Aberdeen

 

[DollyTheLamb]

Shocking that that wee chicken livered woos fucked off on the train . Any normal man would have their sleeves rolled up changing the tyre, pair of total cunts!!!!!

Don’teven get me started on the sunflower lanyard and the disabled parking bay. Beaky bastard need hung!!!!

 

[MarionWaffle]

What the fuck did I just watch?? So. Much. SHITE. He’s tapped in the head. He has to be. He’s not fucking normal is he, and I don’t just mean the shape of his head. And what does this even mean??? It’s his ability to put extra words into a sentence that don’t belong there that defies logic. Is he just thick?

 

[cabbage patch]

What is with this “came through for me” pish patter? Such a damsel in distress, marios superheros in no particular order crapet kerr, Ikea, amazon, falbon wrap accounts etc he really does think he is a ticket as if some folk are wanting him roasting them back and forth with his idea of bespoke

 

[Doodlebug71]

View attachment 735609
That heid

Unloved child syndrome heed

 

[Jemima puddleduck]

Oh lovelies ah am howlin ah dumped ma bespoke boyfriend in the scent loser today an am nae gutted oor anything but this has cheered me reet ap

 

[OhhBacon]

His shirt made me think of that classic 80's show...
*Apologies to the youngsters on here!

 

[fuzzyhoosecoatluvaaa]

Well ma lovelies a canny believe it on this day of dawn we’ve got a bespoke new thread!! You really are ma true lovelies n even though a don’t want aw this exposure as am in ma ain lane a thank youse all, youse all just get me, so aye.

2 weeks ago today was my ain bespoke wains 13th birthday and he couldn’t sleep the night before for excitement god luv the wee soul, but not once, I tell you not once, did he ask to open one of his presents early, probs coz he knows it’s a pyooor rid neck to show off on the gram like the way Marion did but it’s his page his rules his ain lane!!

a was going to go to the boujeee bingo the night but av decided to stay in get aw comfy n cosy on mah non-gifted couch way mah hoosecoat n tights on and am going to celebrate instead way joose n criss and *THAT* drink and then send oor Marion a happy birthday DM thanking him for being born NAE DEBATES xo

 

[Cagayu]

All that gear and no idea….he still can’t blend his jaw line

 

[Whatsallthis]

I hope Del Boy and Hannah are away back out and left him with his comfies. Imagine driving all this way & getting all dolled up only to be back in your hotel room within a couple of hours. What a waste of makeup

 

[Babybail93]

It’s 9.55pm and he’s back in the hotel room they’ve been out roughly 4 hours, max!

 

[Alansbigplate]

That lassie driven all that way and away to her bed ‍

 

[Dawn Dayn]

Got the absolute boak reading this - imagine Marian spraying himself over Hannah like a wee skunk.

It's a cheap pale imitation of dear Tom Ford. If Tom did fly killer. Idiot.
I'm all CROSS today ma lovelies. Has he put that bit of cardboard out by the bins yet. Those balloons are as saggy as Mr Dayn balls.

Mario, you are seriously tapped in the heed to behave like this at your age.
You sad, sad freak of nature.

He lives an entirely urban life. No walks in the woods, no picking pumpkins. Certainly no fucking cooking.
Well unless bespoke syrupy pumpkin spice shite counts.
It makes zero difference to him what season it is, he does the same, and wears the same. He just sets up little shrines to whatever shopping season it is.