Maybe Martin’s family think he’s a bleep tooThey look terrible. Not real boxes either.
I don’t understand why they would make even bigger mugs of themselves
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On the beg for a shark now 
He's a t#wt.On the beg for a shark now
He gets one I’ll be complaining to shark!!!On the beg for a shark now
I work hard for the one I have, he gets one I’ll be fuming.
He is a proper ponce!!!
I really can’t see shark using him to represent their brand, his carpets are tit and he does very minimal cleaning. If he gets one for free I am selling mine..... maybe his parents can get him a knock off one from the guy they got those trainers from 
I don’t see why he would need a shark?? He’s barely got any visible carpet, he’s no kids and a cat who seems to be scared of her own shadow. A cheap one from b&m would do the trick
He's after a new hoover now 
If he can afford a mortgage on a big house with a click of his fingers (as he was so keen to tell us) and he hasn't had to pay for a new tv (he was going to, but his parents stepped in), then buying a Shark shouldn't be a problem should it 'saint saviour of small business (but only when Primark don't sell something similar for a fiver) Melvin'
If he can afford a mortgage on a big house with a click of his fingers (as he was so keen to tell us) and he hasn't had to pay for a new tv (he was going to, but his parents stepped in), then buying a Shark shouldn't be a problem should it 'saint saviour of small business (but only when Primark don't sell something similar for a fiver) Melvin'
So his good friend Sophie has shared lots of accounts with her hinchers on her stories and NO mention of poor Mario
My new avatar, I shall be printing these up into masks for next Halloween 
So what 'bad boy' has he ordered with his Xmas money then lads......
Shark?
Shark?
Bet he’s just ordered a shark , that hoover will chew those thread bare carpet up ...why does he always have bits of skin hanging from his lips ....
Maybe he can use his shark on his ex zeemaBet he’s just ordered a shark , that hoover will chew those thread bare carpet up ...why does he always have bits of skin hanging from his lips ....
Nah, he was hinting for a shark, it will be some more sparkling tat or fake designer goods.
Edit to add: he’s now hedging his bets and trying for a Dysen if shark don’t come through
Edit to add: he’s now hedging his bets and trying for a Dysen if shark don’t come through
He’s trying very hard to get engagement isn’t he. Perhaps his recent follower figures have something to do with it....
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He should have asked for bought followers for Christmas instead of shoes. Though I don’t know how many followers the tenner spent on those shoes would have purchased...
Bought followers.....Look like real followers from a distance but absolute shite close up and they'll probably give you blisters too!
He’s really getting on my nerves going on about nightshift putting his precious sleeping pattern off, does he really not realise people work all different kinds of shifts that impact their body clock and very few of them bang on about it on social media. I worked nightshift Christmas Eve into Christmas Day and was great full I had Christmas Day and Boxing Day off to spend with my family while many of my colleagues had to work 12 hours shifts.
I didn't even know Debenhams did a nightshift? I mean supermarkets I understand because of the high stock turnover and need to prep for the online shoppers, but a department store?
I am learning so much from St Melvin, patron saint of all things bullshit and fake
Yeah Marty boy that’s the way to keep your account classy ...show your boyfriend saying ... get it up you and hand gestures while watching a football match ....and he wonders why no big companies want to collaborate with him ...they really are trashy people 
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