Cleaning with Mario #24 Where is that pavement, where’s his Shark do do do do

[MaxieMoo]

State of my phone though, God help me if the polis ever get hold of it.View attachment 298772

Bet Derek is on Tattle and having a secret wank over these clips.

 

[Tofuniam]

Hahaha can’t wait for the new Hoover review! I too live in a 1 bedroom flat, similar size, although feels bigger as we have much less tat. Our Hoover was £20 off Amazon, does the job just fine.

 

[It’s All Fake]

No. I can’t. I just can’t The million dots. The B&M bag. The crispy hoosecoat

 

[Exhausted Pigeon]

Hate that chunky knit, looks like it's on a bed of fuckin sausages!

 

[menopausalmargrit]

Is that... yellow bell pepper?

A love the cut up slices of Bernard Matthews turkey ham. He’s so boujee.

 

[It’s All Fake]

Anyone else’s teeth on edge at the way he says ‘majority’?

Oh I’ve got a new bespoke phrase.... scent of choice
Youse can youse ma new scent of choice in the majoriey of the colour blush pink as youse all know me well enough. So. Aye.

 

[Kaydeelaydee]

So I see that a lot of the Glasgow grammers are joining forces to promote a brilliant Christmas charity, led by the one that had the recent window journey. Has set up a Just Giving page and the slogan "help a kid for a quid" and they all put it on their stories last night. So far so great and they've already exceeded their donations target.

But I can't help wondering why Melvin isn't a part of this, particularly as he's aw aboot Christmas and his following is bigger than the rest of them combined? Not invited or turned the invitation down? Or missed the call as his outbox is permanently "unindated"?
Waiting to see if he'll give it a shout out seeing as a few of his favourites are involved.

 

[Eat more cake]

The new hoover has an anti hair wrap ...pissing in the wind with that Miriam so aye

Rayns got the most and longest hair in that Borrower flat.

 

[twilightgarden]

I feel sorry for the idiots making ’stovies’ to Mario’s vile, bespoke recipe.

IBS thru the flairboards for the lot of them! So aye. Karmar on their asses. And a whole lot of shite

 

[Popper]

So he’s now the proud owner of 2 hoovers, a handheld Pube sucker and a carpet cleaner? Never mind how they afford it, where the fuck do they store it? Surely the drinks trolley has to go now to fit the new cordless and the bloody Christmas tree??

 

[Poptart]

And a steamer, mop and bucket. He must shove it all ootside the front door when he does a tour of his mansion.

I reckon they are attached to rope and hung out the window.

 

[Kaydeelaydee]

Looking back at Melvins Christmas tree from 5 years ago, I've concluded that he must be suffering from some kind of tree dysmorphia. I see a perfectly nice tree, don't know what he saw. He's done the tree equivalent of too much plastic surgery, Botox and fillers til we land on the pink abomination that was last year's effort.

He'll be congratulating himself on how far he's come on his tree jurnee as well

 

[Badaboom]

I am not sure about Renfrewshire, but in Glasgow it is the council that hire the cleaners for Police Stations, so maybe this IS his dream joab because he now gets free haircuts being a cooncil employee an all??

 

[It’s All Fake]

Oh my god I just can’t with what he wrote Memories!! It means a lot now!! From WHAT???? You spent an afternoon in your flat gluing some wood and plastic tat to the cardboard Jesus he’s addictive

 

[twilightgarden]

surely this is a wind up? ! View attachment 293410

Holy shit! I’m cackling with laughter whilst clutching my hooter, tears streamin down ma face.
He’s such an idiot.

 

[Maggie28]

If he needs fresh air maybe he should just open a window? It’s not hard, you pull the handle and push or pull. Bless him, he would rather go out in his leggings and fake Goochies than open a window.
What he really means is, I want to go to B&M and try one last time for the glass pumpkin.

 

[TheNiceBeardMan]

There was a perfect centrepiece in home bargains for £6.99. Very similar to the one he's made but nicer. And cheaper. And more sturdy. Less shit. Less crap. Did I mention its also nicer?

 

[Popper]

“A dae aw ma touch-points twice a week, aye so ah dae thum aw the time”

WTF touch points? I am thinking he is getting the bespoke phrase of “touch-points” fae his new joab. My work have employed more cleaners to come and do extra cleaning of all touch points though-out the day. However, I work in a school where hundreds of kids with manky hands touch said points throughout the day - not in a polly pocket flat with 2 grown men.

So aye, lovin the touch point chat Marion. Another phrase to add to the list

 

[Noseycow2020]

Hello ma lovelies
I was in ma ain lane so much last night that I missed a new thread being made. Iv got ma hoosecoat on and I’m getting comfy with some criss and joose to enjoy this new dayn of dawn thread.
Mwah mwah mwah

 

[TheNiceBeardMan]

I am underwhelmed.