Right. So the flat he built far the grun’ up disnae huv the wow factor? Och Marlene, huv ye been in at yer man’s stash again the night? Yer talkin absolute shite.
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"Hello ma lovelies" that voice really gets on my tits. Doesn't even clean things right, standing cleaning a mirror while videoing, there's big streaks all down it and he's like "much better" nae bother
His lack of writing/spelling/comprehension abilities means that never a truer word was spoken
I'm laughing so hard at what he thinks are artfully placed LV bags. Nah, Melvin, we are just imagining you with your Pete Beale bag coming to ask if we want to buy anything.
so it’s Del Boy taking the driving lessons, not our Marie.
I bet he thinks he’s gona have his own wee chauffeur now. Don’t do it Derek!!!! There’ll be cheeky doobies to calm the nerves pre lesson I bet
I bet he thinks he’s gona have his own wee chauffeur now. Don’t do it Derek!!!! There’ll be cheeky doobies to calm the nerves pre lesson I bet
Thank God its Derek who's going to learn to drive!
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Awww wee dezza finally doing something for himself 
Canny wait til he gets a car n st Marion tackyfies it wi bespoke boujee fluffy grey dice n a good skoosh of fabulosa. Braw ma lovelies
Canny wait til he gets a car n st Marion tackyfies it wi bespoke boujee fluffy grey dice n a good skoosh of fabulosa. Braw ma lovelies
poor wee Stockholm Syndrome Derek. That’s good hes learning to escape. I mean drive. Nae debates So aye .....
Must be a perk of being famous, most folk I know have been waiting months for an update after they all closed in March. He's all booked in and ready to hit the road and no debate, so ayeThank God its Derek who's going to learn to drive!
Also a newbie- what is boujee and bespoke?
Who has ruffled saint marions feathers to make him post a load of waffle about having a dream flat built from the groon up and hes not jealous of anyones house ma lovelies. not jealous nae debates. #knockoffbaginshotnotgifted
Words mario uses to descibe everything...from toilet cleaner to a sofa!
I am 2 days behind and playing catch-up and I have just laughed out loud and nearly fell off the sofa at this.Early thread suggestion
Marion Potter & the prisoner of Paisley (Derek)
They've gotta be taking the piss. Yeah, well, a poo rolled in glitter is sparkling, but it's still crap
Interior designer? He's basically copied every generic, boring trend going. A two year old could design a better house
Interior designer? He's basically copied every generic, boring trend going. A two year old could design a better house
Melvin patently has no idea either as he tosses them about out of context.
Melvins mass produced plush bed came flat packed and the delivery guys then put it together in his home. Melvin believes this makes it bespoke.
He would describe the way he "styles" this bed as boujee.
Melvins Christmas abomination (tree) in pink would be described by him as both boujee and bespoke.
Fidiot.
Wee Marie highlighting aw the boujie items he wants from the Argos catalogue
Early thread suggestion
Marion Potter & the prisoner of Paisley (Derek)
thisnhas to be the next thread title 
It is maroons lifestyle. It is the future and the way we should all be living
These aren’t the only two that require clarification
Outbox/inbox
Itterate/reiterate
Joost/just/gist
Hunners/no one
Thoosands/one or two
Staple/one of a bajillion others
Game changer/plastic tat & toot that will fall to pieces after first use & be quietly sent to its landfill graveyard
Not greasy/A cardiologists worst nightmare
I’m fine, I’m absolutely fine/ please message me asking what’s wrong, I need attention
Deep clean/ a cursory wipe or hoover around stationary objects
I’m going to work or this could go on indefinitely
Remember someone messaged him asking what boujee meant & he didn’t even knowThese aren’t the only two that require clarification
Outbox/inbox
Itterate/reiterate
Joost/just/gist
Hunners/no one
Thoosands/one or two
Staple/one of a bajillion others
Game changer/plastic tat & toot that will fall to pieces after first use & be quietly sent to its landfill graveyard
Not greasy/A cardiologists worst nightmare
I’m fine, I’m absolutely fine/ please message me asking what’s wrong, I need attention
Deep clean/ a cursory wipe or hoover around stationary objects
I’m going to work or this could go on indefinitely
Sorry I’ve not been able to watch him for a week ? Is he going back to work ? Or did they go bust ?
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