Cleaning with Mario #13 He can't believe it's not clutter

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That fecking head tilt is capable of making me forget I'm a laydee
 
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He needs an army to enforce his rules though, like NAE DEBATES MA LOVELIES. Generalissimo Mario our leader.

Ah I can't cope with anymore SM. I thought tik tok was for weans
It is. Any mid thirties person on it needs their hard drive looking at.
#shade #yesyou
 
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So mah luvlies! Looks like oor marions havin a de clutterin day the day in his bespoke flat ! He’d be as well puttin the full lot in the bin. So aye mah luvlies just incase anybodys missin him the day
 
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He's going to be missing for weeks if he's getting rid of all his junk. Maybe he"ll throw his self in the bin too.
 
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He’s guna be very busy decluttering that bespoke booujie midden
Midden - a timeless classic

He's a dirty wee mock (mawk?) was another mum-ism. Still no idea what that means?

And God love her wee cotton socks, but she'd probably have described Melvin's kitchen cupboard as a glory hole . This DID NOT mean what it does today. It just used to describe an area/room/cupboard that resembled a dumping ground.

Circa late 70's Kaydeelaydee junior would come in from playing outside in the fields around our home and be rebuked thus:

You're getting bathed tonight you dirty wee mock and then you can tidy that glory hole you call a bedroom
 
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My
My mum used to say c'mere you , yer mockit get in the bath lol
 
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Hello ma lovelies how are we awww? Was just wondering if any one else noticed what happened to Marion’s nightly stories.... him couped up in bed and deek sitting squashed(stoned) beside him anyways was just a thought coz it seems like our patron saint of small businesses is hardly ever oan the gram now. Wee prick is just giving us tiny snippets so aye....
 
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"And Clutter" Ha. What's betting he read the thread title if and it sent him in a tizzy! bet he's like Hyacinth Bucket! Can't stand the thought of people thinking his (Derek's) flat is anything but perfect . He should be thanking Tattler's for pointing out what a hot, cluttered mess his kitchen and home was. Unlike those kiss arses who tell him everything is jus stunnin

 
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I am guessing he will be going back to work in a couple of weeks, so his ‘decluttering’ is probably him trying to hide all the crap he has been buying since he entered lockdown because soon Derek will be home without him around and it will all come to light.
 
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He's teasing us with snippets, the wee shite! I actually miss his non-bathroom cleaning Stories and general ramblings and shit-chat because I not-so-secretly have a fondness for Mazza, so aye....
 
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