He's hard of hairline ma lovelei xx
Cleaning with Mario #124 Dressed up to sit in the hotel lobby in clothes so small we can see Deek's boaby
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Buys all this unnecessary tit but can't buy a) a new honking housecoat that doesn't make him look like a middle aged women or b) a new honking fleecy hoodie that looks like it smells like old ham.mother of the bride hoosecoat is back and so forth
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Further thoughts after his bespoke dots-of-doom... Saying we don't have air-con in this country. What utter bollocks. More and more people are having it installed or if they can't have it installed they're getting portable units with the elephant trunk bit that hangs out the window. He just can't get either because a) he's in a council flat and b) Rayn would make a jump for it if he left the window open. And besides I thought his fancy git Dyson fan had a "cool mode"?? So what's he complaining for?
Why is he making out like he's got some high-powered job where people's lives or a bespoke amount of money are on the line? This is no shade to cleaners at all, but I wouldn't exactly say it's the type of job where you have to be completely serious. Most likely they don't follow him (because it would be embarrassing) and they probably don't talk to him very much at all because it would be like trying to talk to a sponge.
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Can see he wore his watch on holiday to get a strap line, just so he can show everyone he has been to that place ‘abroad’ 
Can someone confirm that there’s “vile heat” and that it’s “clammy” in that there Beirut in the place they call Scotland 
A few questions after dots o doom. how does his hair manage to grow/be styled in 76 different directions, but he only has 43 individual hairs on his head. And why is he wearing what looks like that thing the dentist puts over you before a tooth x-ray.
Has he picked a filter as hard of intelligence as him?! It can’t deal with his stubble and it makes me incandescent with rage to watch, but, hens, I cannae look away.
That’s the tan line from his little all inclusive band ma lovely. Even though he didn’t use the all inclusive facilities because he only frequents fine dining establishmentsCan see he wore his watch on holiday to get a strap line, just so he can show everyone he has been to that place ‘abroad’
He didne like the AI ma lovelie, he’s too fussy so they did self catering so they could enjoy all the fine dining that Lindsay Rottee offers. Like fry upsThat’s the tan line from his little all inclusive band ma lovely. Even though he didn’t use the all inclusive facilities because he only frequents fine dining establishments
Lindsay Rotte, Makin' Mammeries pt.2 🪇
Spreadin' ma wings far 'n wide, Sae lang as it's within th' Canary Islands, in Spain, capesh?
Dinnae drink the tap worta or ye' deed. Also 
Spreadin' ma wings far 'n wide, Sae lang as it's within th' Canary Islands, in Spain, capesh?
Dinnae drink the tap worta or ye' deed. Also 
After all these years of watching him it still fascinates me how he can say so much but so little and how much all the words are jumbled up. Exhausting ma lovelies.
Just listened to the dots of doom and honestly, why the duck did he bother? Just rattling on about absolute nonsense as per. And why has he brought two big tubs of aloe vera home? Has he not enough skincare shite, his skin looks like a bleeping dead rattlesnakes so none of it works, not sure why he bothers.
Getting on there about how professional he is at work yet still rocks up to the place in the purple leggings from the car wash - so aye.
Also confirming he bought a couple of fake bags in Lanza, so the diorsaddle shite bag must be from there too, not that I give a duck, wouldn't be seen dead with that bag in my house nevermind out in public.
Martins passions are not my passions.
Spine Bright
Blind Nikita Dug
Debbie Harris
Hard of English
& so forth
New York in America
Also.
Also.
Also.
Getting on there about how professional he is at work yet still rocks up to the place in the purple leggings from the car wash - so aye.
Also confirming he bought a couple of fake bags in Lanza, so the dior
Martins passions are not my passions.
Spine Bright
Blind Nikita Dug
Debbie Harris
Hard of English
& so forth
New York in America
Also.
Also.
Also.
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I can’t see Mario getting into the gay scene in Gran Can. More likely that in a gay bar he’d be sitting clutching his Dior fake, proper cats bum mouth, while Deek giggled away. They’re more the type to think they’re so edgy going to see a drag queen at the nearby Red Lion
Thank you, I see now I’ve zoomed In. What he trying to do cover the receding hair line? Looks worse the way he’s gelled a strip down
Reminds me of when you get Christmas tree out of the box (not long now ma lovelies 
) and the branches are half flat and need sorting outAttachments
IDKBIGTK so siMa luveleh,
So Si = So Aye, in Lanzarotian (a country he recently visited although YMNKANTGTK as he's no really mentioned it oan his page!)
Capeesh (spelled "Capesh" in Marion) is because his Da is 900th Italian and he thinks it makes his point/argument winning by adding it to the end of his rambles.
Hope that helped YGTK and so on and so forth
The neckline scares meSee what youse lot mean about the dreaded "dots of doom"!
Edited slaw mo
so si.Hello, long time lurker on this fabulous thread.
could someone experienced post Mario’s review on the jet2 app(sorry I don’t know how to do it). It’s the best thing you’ll read all year. Especially thanking the staff for giving Derek crayons
could someone experienced post Mario’s review on the jet2 app(sorry I don’t know how to do it). It’s the best thing you’ll read all year. Especially thanking the staff for giving Derek crayons
OMGGGGG WHAT A bleeping TREATIT THIS IS!!!!!!
"Bin men ur creepy!" is 100% ma favourite for now.
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Please keep spinning these bespokeLindsay Rotte, Makin' Mammeries pt.2 🪇
Spreadin' ma wings far 'n wide, Sae lang as it's within th' Canary Islands, in Spain, capesh?
hen.Keep yer power! Shouting ye fae the rooftops dawl!!!
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Pure gorgeous bespoke profile picture ma henIDKBIGTK so si
Well, ah'm aboot ten miles away and ah'm boiling. I am also menopausal and sit with a fan on in wintum.Can someone confirm that there’s “vile heat” and that it’s “clammy” in that there Beirut in the place they call Scotland
It's spring like temperature so nae taps aff spotted yet ma lovelie
Reckon the wee loo brush heed thought he was a v.i.p getting off the plane and being handed a jet2 money off your next holiday voucher. How I so wish he did and put on stories #ad thinking jet2 were having a colab with the celeb himself #minimumcleaningwithMario
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