Cleaning with Mario #119 Busy? Naw, Lazy? Aye.

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I've been in bits all night laughing...

If he was going for the "doing a quick run round freshen up when someone is popping over at short notice" fair enough. But see instead of giving it "awww nawww ma mawwws coming!! Quick Derek cover the smell of the shite with three full cans of febreeze!"...he could have been a normal person and shown himself quickly tidying the sofa cushions (maybe even a bit of febreeze to combat any smells from the cat because it's so effective on pet smells)...throwing some rubbish in the bin (and another wee spray because it's so effective at combating bin smells) and then shown himself cracking a window and reminding people to let fresh air in to help circulate those gorgeous new scents...then if he wanted to make a joke about the loo he could have left the bottle on the back of the loo and said just in case and a wee wink...

There you go ya big penis I've written your bloody advert for you

Imagine the scenes at Febreeze head office tomorrow morning. That bad boy is definitely getting put up on the big screen at the morning buzz meeting
 
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Hen they should be paying you on that app!! Could have done a bit about having an indoor cat means having pet smells. Or cooking leaving cooking smells (just cooked himself a fry up for breakfast maybe). But no he just went with telling his millions of thousand followers that his house flat feckin stinks of shit and that his mams spelling and grammar is just as bad, if not worse than his.
And he wonders why this thread is so entertaining.
 
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Aye ma lovelie, our Marion is disposing of his bespoke sTanLeY cup via the no opening winde after single use, straight tae midden heap, smell the wealth. Factual
 
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Who needs management when youse huv an AOL email address.
 
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Anytime he does an ad it's worth it's gold in weight. Flash back to the Christmas ad when he seemed to think that having family and friends over causes "stinks" in your house someone's needing to tell him that not everyone's house smells like shit 24/7.
 
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Same hen. I've never commented or interacted on any of these instacunts posts but suddenly one morning I found myself blocked from 4 of them, all stemming from a post put up about how ptwm was scamming, I put a like on a video they posted and wham! Blocked by 4 of them.
 
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Lovelies! The big bathroom shower cubicle reveal must be soon. I can’t wait fae the predictability of it all.

1. Starts a coontdoon tae the big reveal with a sneaky pic
2. Gets impatient and shoots his load early
3. “They’ve went ABOVE AND BEYOND tae pull this oot the bag!”
4. “The difference is day and night! Absalooot day and night! Worth their gold in weight!”
5. Haul showing where she got everything from (B&M)
6. Weeks of the same picture on his stories with “let’s get this day done!” on it at 11.30am
 
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Yours was much better!
 
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Fuck me, you are actually Mystic Meg
 
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Who needs management when youse huv an AOL email address.
Thread title ma lovelie
---
7. He does a grand reveal and it looks the exact same except the accessories are a different shade of non colour and the jo molane guest soap has been wiped down of all the dust from non use
 
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I'm wasted in the high footfall area that is the legal department of shining in my own life

But there's just so many things that would have made sense for him. He lives in a block of flats so he could have said no matter how clean you are or how much you try to ventilate smells travel and cooking smells in the evening are a pain! *insert how great febreeze is*...he has an indoor pet...he works as a bloody cleaner! Why not talk about using it at work and it being a key product for him especially in larger office buildings where he needs to tackle smells quickly...

Marion if you'd just sat down for five minutes and thought about it pal. A wee mind map (as your pal Hinch she has a whole bloody book about them)...a wee storyboard.

But naw. You flung your manky stinking oodie over your skiddy leggings and went with "I've just took a massive shite and ma maws coming".

I'll never get over it. His engagement must be through the roof with people watching it on repeat in total confusion and disbelief

Anyway spine bright and remember no one has your power but you.
 
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Rest of Sunday.



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Monday.




.
 
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Jist stumbled across Mother Rendall, holy fuck are her and stinkin hoose maz related? Same shite talk, same facial expressions, same grasp of the English language, who's copying who here? It was like watching maz in drag.
 
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Thank goad av goat the fubreeze in the case. Thank goad.

Nut. I canny cope. It's too good. People huv tae know. Come on JoyOfClean - this has to be your prime time tv and social media advert. Surely. Never mind the one with the woman who let's the dog run through the house then the wee febreeze bubbles eat all the manky smell bubbles. No I know you spent thousands developing the idea, casting, shooting and editing it. But listen - Marion is your moneymaker. I promise.

It wiz abzulootly stinkin and after three different scents in the high footfall area Marion managed to hide the stink of his visibly cleaned bedsit fae oor Sadie.

Guys it's tipped me over the edge. I've sent it out in a whole office email it's that good
 
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Jist stumbled across Mother Rendall, holy fuck are her and stinkin hoose maz related? Same shite talk, same facial expressions, same grasp of the English language, who's copying who here? It was like watching maz in drag.
They are both from the slums in/around Glasgow my lovelie (not sure where she is from but has the same ghetto talk as Marion)
 
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The embarrassment of that ad! In what world are his acting skills on point? They are fucking shocking! It's bloody hilarious!
 
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Hello ma lovelies. I watched the Febreze “advert” at silly o clock in the morning so didne want to comment then.

It was pish! The hammy acting! The declaring his hoose is ‘honking and stinking’! The fugly Oodie! The misspelt text from stripper shoe Sadie!

All in all, 10/10 Marion, defo your best work for all the wrong reasons.

P.S. Sadie foisted him and his giant beak off onto the Auntie, There’s no way she would voluntarily go and visit. Ye ma hates ya Mazda
 
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Sadie must be raging. No way did she send that text. I’m guessing she didn’t know that this was happening, and is going to be mortified that a) he made her look illiterate and b) used a photo that makes her look like a transvestite.

 
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