He is such a hoarder he just can't stop himself buying stuff that he has zero room for and nowhere.to put it.
Cleaning with Mario #105 Jizz on his face, he’s a big disgrace, waving his snail snot all over the place
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‘Old faves, new faves and new staples.’
For next year? All unopened? How can they be faves or staples then?
And he described his makeup use as being both infrequent and mostly a wee dab of concealer, powder and lip balm… before going on to detail multiples of every product?!
Stop lying Mario! You contradict yourself in every sentence!
And as for ‘muted nude deep pink’ which is DARKEST RED, I have no words
For next year? All unopened? How can they be faves or staples then?
And he described his makeup use as being both infrequent and mostly a wee dab of concealer, powder and lip balm… before going on to detail multiples of every product?!
Stop lying Mario! You contradict yourself in every sentence!
And as for ‘muted nude deep pink’ which is DARKEST RED, I have no words
None of his make up has been used. He also forgets the lies he tells. Factual.
How he pronounced rodial omfg 
I’ll stay in Marley also
Comedy gold today
I’ll stay in Marley also
Comedy gold today
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It’s like when a tiktoker gets their boyfriend to describe their makeup products knowing they have no clue and the boyfriend just says phrases he’s overheard the girlfriend say in order to make it sound like he knows what he’s talking about. Also why the duck would anyone care about his fave makeup products, it’s not like he’s ever pictured wearing them, and when he is he’s overfiltered to duck and as orange as a big cheesy wotsit
So many dots of doom so I treatit masel. His Morphe brush is really dense! Aye just lit you Marion ya massive eejit 
Maz trying to normalise men trying to wear make up has cracked me up the day. He Ken’s duck all about anything
Not sure who wears makeup in 40 degree heat - it just runs off your face, it smell sweet and the mosquito bad boys crawl all over you. Hope he's not taking his scent, he's going to get eaten alive. Needs to get himself to Avon for some skin so soft 
What a bloody sin, someone's needing to have a word with him. He's a part time cleaner, living in an utter tit tip spending hundreds every month on utter dross. I'm honestly feeling sorry for him.
Plus he doesn't get spots and has good skin
his skin is beyond dehydrated, he's got suitcases not bags under his poached egg eyes + his lips are like sandpaper 
he's one deluded wee numptie
Plus he doesn't get spots and has good skin
his skin is beyond dehydrated, he's got suitcases not bags under his poached egg eyes + his lips are like sandpaper he's one deluded wee numptieAlways providing the laughs isn’t she? The way she’s going on derek will be allowed to fill a single carrier bag and she’ll fill the two cases with all her cheap and nasty goods. When we go to that place *abroad’ I take maybe a skin tint, bronzer and a few lipsticks cause I’m not arsed. I actually hope her case goes missing. Karma on your arse.
Saddest stories from him yet. A full bag of make up he’s never used, for his week in the sun when most people usually take a break from the make up. Clearly trying to throw in as many terms he’s learned off TikTok like cool tones, dewy, matte, muted nude, none of it making sense in the context of the product he’s talking about. I do honestly pity him.
I'm obviously doing this holiday lark wrong. I go in a week's time, and silly me hasn't bought a whole make up bags worth of cosmetics a year in advance, suncream a year in advance and personalised cups. I did however buy a new suitcase but that was last week so I'm definitely doing it wrong, I should have bought it 51 weeks ago.... I shall take some concealer (one Martin), blusher and mascara, that's it. He is a Muppet
Vive had massive sale thing on other week or double/triple points something like that. This is why he has bought all this Vive make up.
How embarrassing claim to fame how he used to work with Jamie G, except she is a true lover of make up and actually worked on Make up counter. Mario only wears basic male up once a year to go to his nieces dance school party at the local community hall.
So he's planning on putting all that make up into a case? He is brave we have all seen the way they bash your cases about and her certainly won't be able to take it on carry on in that black case.
When I go on holiday I take concealer and bit bronzer I can't stand a full face of make up on any heat.
Seen a snipit of his smart meter earlier £60 on it please tell me that it's a top up meter and he hasn't actually spent £60 months on electric already..then again all the lamps, plug in air fresheners, wax melters, phones, laptop, selfie ring light, hoovers wouldn't be surprised if that was his bill for a week.
Some of youse DM me asked why I've been quiet I've been off work and away to Belfast for few days this app isnae ma Joab but thought would tell youse since soo many youse DM me. Sooo ayyye. Also
How embarrassing claim to fame how he used to work with Jamie G, except she is a true lover of make up and actually worked on Make up counter. Mario only wears basic male up once a year to go to his nieces dance school party at the local community hall.
So he's planning on putting all that make up into a case? He is brave we have all seen the way they bash your cases about and her certainly won't be able to take it on carry on in that black case.
When I go on holiday I take concealer and bit bronzer I can't stand a full face of make up on any heat.
Seen a snipit of his smart meter earlier £60 on it please tell me that it's a top up meter and he hasn't actually spent £60 months on electric already..then again all the lamps, plug in air fresheners, wax melters, phones, laptop, selfie ring light, hoovers wouldn't be surprised if that was his bill for a week.
Some of youse DM me asked why I've been quiet I've been off work and away to Belfast for few days this app isnae ma Joab but thought would tell youse since soo many youse DM me. Sooo ayyye. Also
All that make up for a week of sweating in the sun. Where exactly is he going to wear any of that to in Lanzarote? It’s hardly a big night out island. It’ll be a spag bol in the buffet at 6, then back in the room aw cosy by half 6
So more make up than a room full of drag queens and he still looks 10 days dead
Oan his seNsiTivE skin!!!! Blocked and reported ma lovelie, never message this page again!!!!Needs to get himself to Avon for some skin so soft
Ah cud actually see Martin being a ding dong Avon lady. Gawn roon the Beirut doors in a white beauty dress, a wee shopping trolley wi his wares #raynsdasellsavon
Have we ever actually seen him apply or wear make up?
Also cant wait till he gets to lanza and all that tit melts in the heat he’s going to end up in hospital with heat stroke, you burn easily in lanza because of the wind you don't notice how much sun you’ve actually taken. I burnt my back there once and couldn't lie on it for a week 
Also cant wait till he gets to lanza and all that tit melts in the heat
he’s going to end up in hospital with heat stroke, you burn easily in lanza because of the wind you don't notice how much sun you’ve actually taken. I burnt my back there once and couldn't lie on it for a week “Disney go cakey”
I’m just watching for the captions, oh, and Marion, no I don’t know
I’m just watching for the captions, oh, and Marion, no I don’t know
Deek ya wee scruffy basturt, set ma wee stool down the nooo, and fetch me ma bleeping solero, also.
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