Cleaning with Mario #101 Mario McKnight (she/her)

[Ratgrrl]

Every photo of Derek makes him look like a dog on an animal rescue page who’s up for adoption but has been in the shelter for so long that they have to resort to cutesy anthropomorphism to try and get taker

This is Derek. A Jack Russell/Shih tzu mix, he’s a petit gent who didn’t have the best start in life. His last owner kept him chained up in a small flat for most of the day, and fed him a high-fat diet which stunted Derek’s growth.

When Derek first came to us, he had severe dental issues so his new furever family would need to be experienced in dealing with extreme gingivitis.

Derek is now fully grown and ready for his new home. He’d like to be the only dog in a house and would prefer to not have someone home all day.

Cat-tested.
As good as neutered.

Actually laughed out loud at this. So fucking funny and real.

 

[mammaof3]

His reel.
We shall be inundated with pics every morning of his kitchen, rather than the gifted breeze block sofa.

 

[pinkwaferbiscuit]

Hello ma lovelies, am noo weeelllll. Cannae believe how much she hates her hideous, hubba bubba sofa, the fat fuck. She barely posts it, bet Danyell is fumming. I bet a leg has already snapped off the cheap tat, when Marion flumped her fat arse on it. What's with the collection of prolapsed bumhole vases? Glad I've caught up in time for the kitchen reveal. Tons blessings to youse aw. Oh and Marion couldn't possibly be the father of Greedys baby, Marion is not man enough to produce sperm. As you aw know, her balls are the size of petit pois, talcum powdered to fuck and back. Aye.

Hen it’s true, ah huv the photie tae proove it!

 

[DesperadosRUs]

What a time to be alive hen. I'll be here aw cosy with ma joose and criss whilst Barny Rubble and Fred Flinstone huff and puff around Benners!! The bumming fort is on tour hen!!! No ma quote. Shouting them and their man made fabrics on from the roof tops!

And isnt black orchid a TF scent? My husband bought some for me around 2016. I'm clear an OG. Smell tha wealth!
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Bummin fort on tour haha cummin to a toon near youse

although Marion’s wee back will stick to the bespoke plastic pure faux leather pull doon sofa in the open plan kitchenette/front room. He’ll prolly no take his preemark vest oaf though so mibby he will be alright. It’s gonna end in tears lovlies
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Awryt hens no been oan here since wee baby Jesus was at school, right aboot the same era Marion claims he thought aboot his 2023 Xmas tree (afore Hinch and that lot) - nae debates oan this thread. Been watchin her mind you! Bookin her wee 7 days in the Solana gie'in wee Lesley a run for his money. I see oor Moanin minge is still givin us aw Clune Park vibes IYDKTGTK by point blank refusin tae budge and 'renovatin' the kitchen (so she means she's re-falbonin and puttin a boax roon that daft meter). The day they puhl doon they flats I can picture our Marion havin hawf eh Strathclyde emergency services there, cuttin oot windaes wae an industrial lift tae get her oot, oor Marion shoutin 'WATCH MA VOILLLZZZZ!!!' then wee Dr. Nowzardin appears sayin 'Loose another 25lbs tae be approved for a new cooncil hoos' Oor Marion gettin cheered like a wee hero carted aff tae the Hamish Alan, flashin the shart caird demandin a back n front door. Anywiys ma imagination runs wild hens. I'm here fur the holiday jurnay, the kitchen jurnay, Auatum jurnay, Crissmiss Jurnay and Marion's biggest jurnay- the return tae Edinburgh oan the McGills. So Aye. Let's boot C H O O S D A Y in the fudd and spine bright dolls.

this is like suhin Shakespeare would have wrote if he had spent his days cuttin aboot Paisley makin pals with Fanny’s like those two. Fuckin spot on shakey-Jakey-P

 

[Pepsi]

I’ve aff linked it for you ma lovelie barg

View attachment 2247064

Swiping up the noo hen, tonsa love #treatit yursel ta a new Smeg toastie wi the #aff link money

 

[SuzyE]

Hello ma lovelies, am noo weeelllll. Cannae believe how much she hates her hideous, hubba bubba sofa, the fat fuck. She barely posts it, bet Danyell is fumming. I bet a leg has already snapped off the cheap tat, when Marion flumped her fat arse on it. What's with the collection of prolapsed bumhole vases? Glad I've caught up in time for the kitchen reveal. Tons blessings to youse aw. Oh and Marion couldn't possibly be the father of Greedys baby, Marion is not man enough to produce sperm. As you aw know, her balls are the size of petit pois, talcum powdered to fuck and back. Aye.

Feel better soon lovely

 

[Madge2022]

Snakes oan this app. Nae debates.
Marion ain't pregnant, just fat as fuck.
View attachment 2254915

That's no bad fur your first attempt ma lovelie, remember practice makes ok

 

[Ferguson]

I've just came to say the same. It creeps me out

Gives me Jimmy Saville vibes & so forth.
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I have just caught up with the wiki. I am flabbergasted! dim deek

Aye, he let us all doon & nae debates.

 

[Mum3boys]

Thread title contender.... "He's not getting his hawns on a hoose any time soon"

Thanks for chanting me oan from the roof tops hen , sending tattie hearts your way

 

[Luna25]

How small is the fridge I know he’s a hobbit but it’s tiny

 

[Lim1947]

Brown beauty, brown jobbie mare like. Please tell me you edited that image. Pure beak clutcher.

Unfortunately I do not have the magical wizardry of @hopethishelpsallthebest , this is bespoke Marion at his finest

 

[SuzyE]

Well I googled it, and now I’m howling. Beaked nose

View attachment 2252492

And knowing about his Kerry Katonas it has to be right!

 

[maxxxxx]

It's his overuse of "utter" for me

Reposted his kitchen early last night, and only 33 comments. Yeah, people are bored with it already

View attachment 2250444

STOPPPP, what is the new box?!
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It's his overuse of "utter" for me

Reposted his kitchen early last night, and only 33 comments. Yeah, people are bored with it already

View attachment 2250444

no I can't handle anything more ! the strip light, multiple meters, the squint handles. i feel like im tripping

 

[mammaof3]

Is the Fanta Orange glass because he's known as Orange Man on here, even though Maz never reads that vile site?

Sorry, I did reply above and hastily posted, was running to collect the young un from swimming then re-read it agin the no.

You refer to product placement so aye. Mario is not that bright ma lovelie.

 

[twilightgarden]

His whole living room looks like a downmarket dentists waiting room

The laugh of it is his teeth are rotten Not attending your follow up appointments Maz as they’re not free anymore?
The whistle from the gap in his false teeth will be quite something.

 

[SellYerMawForASubwaySalad]

I can’t wait until he fizzes it too much and it explodes in his face

I done this and trapped my finger between the bottle and the bottom of the machine.

The most painful thing I've ever felt and took ages to release it.

It got binned after that episode
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Fucking hell, a fizzy drink stayshun. I can hear the bespoke sign makers oan that small biz app Etsy rubbing their hands in glee.

Wonder if it's taken 6 months to plan as well

 

[mammaof3]

Fooking hell how many stories for a kitchen wrap and tidy up.

Spoiler: Hoose

Spoiler: New kitchen.

 

[melonsandlemons]

Aye this might be swerving out of my lane a bit hen but I used Frenchic. If you’ve not heard of it before look up the groups on Facebook (Frenchic Fun and Frenchic Fan Forum) it’s truly miraculous stuff. Even more miraculous than Mario’s wax melt range so aye

Recommended by so many
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The thing about owning or a private let is you need a bit of a financial safety net. Fees, fluctuations in interest rates, emergencies etc all need actual savings not 3 easy online payments. Plus even with savings how could they possibly borrow on such low hours?

In a way I do hope he's happy where he is.

I love Frenchic- amazing stuff!

 

[Anti-influencer]

I know I say it alllll the time, but his overuse of the word “also” gets right on my fucking tits!

Me too hen also 🩷

 

[blueblue]

But isn't his block getting certain cosmetic upgrades as they aren't getting demolished? Although tbh I can see a local authority painting white but not doing cupboards, and not for sitting tenants.

It's just the waste, and his inability to cotton on to the fact these spending splurges do not make him happy.