^You should report any company where they ask you at interview about children - it's illegal.
I love my pets but we are going through quite a lot with a 15-year-old Labrador, and 20-year-old cat, at the moment - both are in their end of life phase which is so awful to witness, and hard for our younger pets too. When they pass the heartbreak will cut deep. We've had these two for about five years (both rescues), and it never gets any easier. Pets do bring so much enjoyment and contentment, but they are expensive, plus they do ruin things (soft furnishings ...). I think when all of our current pets pass, we might just go back to keeping our chickens only (which more than earn their keep by delivering beautiful fresh eggs every day).This sounds horrible, but I am looking forward to the time of being pet free after the cat and dog we have now are no longer around. I may get pets again in the future but I'm looking forward to no pet hair and not having look after pets.
Although, the North east is quite a dog friendly Place so people can take their dog to the pub on an evening, which you can't do with kids ( it's like up til 9pm for them , or something)
It is, but this is (nearly always) done in a, "tell me about yourself - do you have any children?" kind of way.^You should report any company where they ask you at interview about children - it's illegal.
My neighbours have a dog. Her husband arrived home with it one day despite her saying that she did NOT want a dog. Somebody he worked with, their dog had pups and he decided he'd love one. Guess who does all the walking, vet visits, feeding and minding etc. Clue: it's not him. She loves the dog now but she said when he's gone they are NOT getting another one under any circumstances and I think her dozy husband has now realised how much care they need and how much it costs to put them in kennels whenever they go away on holiday.This sounds horrible, but I am looking forward to the time of being pet free after the cat and dog we have now are no longer around. I may get pets again in the future but I'm looking forward to no pet hair and not having look after pets.
Although, the North east is quite a dog friendly Place so people can take their dog to the pub on an evening, which you can't do with kids ( it's like up til 9pm for them , or something)
I've noticed the friend thing too... They have kids and you eventually get phased out. Two of my best friends from school had kids and while we stayed in touch, we never met up without the kids. One of them would always insist we meet up in soft play centres or pubs with kids menus and play areas while the other would only meet at her house, so the kids would be able to play and not get bored. Both were married and had parents who helped out with childcare so it's not like they weren't able to go out for a child free evening occasionally. I like their kids, but catching up with friends just isn't the same when little ears are listening and they are demanding attention! Sometimes I felt like I spent more time playing with their kids than catching up with them. I think if I had kids it would be different because the kids would play together, we'd have more in common as mum friends. Sadly my friendship with both of these people has fizzled out over the years.I don't have children, mainly because I had such an awful childhood that I was worried I might unwillingly repeat the experience for any children I brought into the world (if that makes sense?). Also, I live in a very expensive country - I don't know how I could afford them!
It's not that I don't like children - on the contrary, I'm an aunt (a favourite aunt in at least one case), and a godmother to a dear friend's son ... although he calls me 'SecondMum' as my dear friend passed five years ago when he was in his early teens and he's come to stay with me during the school holidays ever since.
I have lost friends* and jobs** as a result - people just think it's a really weird decision to have made. Oh well; that's their problem. My mother-in-law will often make a nasty little comment such as, "I don't know why you bothered to get married" ... again, that's her problem, not mine.
* Even people I've had decade-long friendships with - after having kids, they've suddenly ghosted me (ironically though, an ex-friend contacted me out of the blue a few days ago - it's been 20-odd years since I last left a message for her and she never responded - to say her kids have flown the nest so it's time for us to catch up ... um, no ... I wasn't good enough for you at any point in the past 20 years so you can bugger off!
** Usually at interview stage ... things have gone really well up until the point of being asked if I have children and as soon as I've said no, the whole mood of the meeting has changed
Same situation with me! I phased my closest friend of 20 years because our lives were too different. It would always be arranged around her and she would always have one of them with her. Tbh the friendship was fizzling out and we saw each other and spoke few and far between (but I noticed she would always be doing stuff with other friends with kids). When a relative died and she saw via my sister on social media, she apologised for going Mia, but if she had been a proper friend I would have told her the circumstances with said relative and she wouldn’t have found out that way.I've noticed the friend thing too... They have kids and you eventually get phased out. Two of my best friends from school had kids and while we stayed in touch, we never met up without the kids. One of them would always insist we meet up in soft play centres or pubs with kids menus and play areas while the other would only meet at her house, so the kids would be able to play and not get bored. Both were married and had parents who helped out with childcare so it's not like they weren't able to go out for a child free evening occasionally. I like their kids, but catching up with friends just isn't the same when little ears are listening and they are demanding attention! Sometimes I felt like I spent more time playing with their kids than catching up with them. I think if I had kids it would be different because the kids would play together, we'd have more in common as mum friends. Sadly my friendship with both of these people has fizzled out over the years.
I had been friends with both of these people since school, one of them since primary, the other secondary, so more than 30 years now. I feel like because I don't have kids I'm not interesting enough for themSame situation with me! I phased my closest friend of 20 years because our lives were too different. It would always be arranged around her and she would always have one of them with her. Tbh the friendship was fizzling out and we saw each other and spoke few and far between (but I noticed she would always be doing stuff with other friends with kids). When a relative died and she saw via my sister on social media, she apologised for going Mia, but if she had been a proper friend I would have told her the circumstances with said relative and she wouldn’t have found out that way.
I probably sound like a witch, but just because you’ve been friends for x amount of years, doesn’t mean you have to stay friends.
My lovely grandma used to say there’s nothing more boring than other people’s children. She was so right! I’m sure even if you have children yourself you’re not interested in hearing all about somebody else’s. So for those of us without it’s even worseI had been friends with both of these people since school, one of them since primary, the other secondary, so more than 30 years now. I feel like because I don't have kids I'm not interesting enough for thembut to be honest, its not that interesting listening to endless stories of how little Johnny is excelling at piano and has a reading age of 15 and he's only in reception!
True, when I had my coffee shop a regular customer came in and proceeded to attempt to show photos of his new baby. As he scrolled through I said to him that I hoped that he wasn't going to show me a photo of his newborn as I was barely interested in my own so definitely not interested in his. He took it well, in fact he admitted that he wasn't that interested in the baby either.My lovely grandma used to say there’s nothing more boring than other people’s children. She was so right! I’m sure even if you have children yourself you’re not interested in hearing all about somebody else’s. So for those of us without it’s even worse![]()
Oh definitely! I work with kids and try not to bore people with stories about them! I have 15 years of experience of working with the under 5s so my friends were always keen to pick my brains about development issues, sleep problems, feeding etc, but never seemed to take me as seriously as their mum friends because I'm not a parent.My lovely grandma used to say there’s nothing more boring than other people’s children. She was so right! I’m sure even if you have children yourself you’re not interested in hearing all about somebody else’s. So for those of us without it’s even worse![]()
I was out with two friends on Saturday for drinks and we went to what we thought was quite an upscale cafe bar, which only opened three weeks ago that serves lovely cocktails and bar snacks. It’s not particularly cheap. We were amazed at the number of people who had small children in there with them. Both my friends have children but said they would never dream of taking them somewhere like that. Apart from the cost etc, can’t there just be some places where you can go for a nice drink without kids shouting and running around everywhere. The toilets were a mess, and some of the tables and seats were filthy when the customers left.
Pub in the New Forest bans children under 12 many parents triggered
I wish more places would do this, to be honest. I enjoy the company of my loved ones children in moderation, but there are many spaces that I don't want to see children in. The most annoying parents are the ones who insist that, "Having a baby doesn't mean anything has to change! We're still super cool and hip!" and bring their babies/toddlers *everywhere*
Nailing my colours to the mast of children should be neither seen nor heard /tongueincheek
Call me old-fashioned but I don’t think that pubs are or should be a place for children. At least not little ones….
Pub in the New Forest bans children under 12 many parents triggered
I wish more places would do this, to be honest. I enjoy the company of my loved ones children in moderation, but there are many spaces that I don't want to see children in. The most annoying parents are the ones who insist that, "Having a baby doesn't mean anything has to change! We're still super cool and hip!" and bring their babies/toddlers *everywhere*
Nailing my colours to the mast of children should be neither seen nor heard /tongueincheek
Only ever heard people who have siblings say that it's cruel to only have one child, I was an only child and perfectly happy with it!!Ok so I’m not childfree or childless, I have a beautiful 3yo - but I don’t really like children other than my own, other people’s kids/pics of them are boring, so is mum chat, it’s absolutely not selfish to know that you don’t want children in fact I’d say it’s the opposite. We get called selfish often as we don’t plan to have any more and it’s cruel to have an only child, apparently! So you can’t win either way![]()
I would have loved to be an only child to be honest! It was my dreamOnly ever heard people who have siblings say that it's cruel to only have one child, I was an only child and perfectly happy with it!!