Thats awful. The sad part is I know a lot of women who would judge other mothers/families like this too. My own mother prioritised housework and having an immaculate home over spending time with us.Something horrifying I read in the news, a tragic story of a couple that lost their newborn to SIDS. And in the article it mentioned the police/investigators had stated “the property was clean and tidy and their was plenty of food in the fridge” as a reason to rule out foul play! Jesus Christ my anxiety could not handle that pressure! What if their house was a mess and the fridge was empty! God knows I don’t even have a baby and sometimes I feel so ashamed at the state of my flat due to my mental health or just being plain busy. Couldn’t deal with the constant pressure to keep on top of things to make sure I’m not accused of neglecting my baby!
Oh my god “you’ll make a great mum” is the worstI'm still in the middle of whether I do or not but the comments like "when you have your baby you'll feel different" or "when you get older you'll be different" or "you'll regret it if you don't" or "you'll make a great mom"..... So frustrating!!!!
Or a few times have been told it, based on the way I'm good with my dogs!Oh my god “you’ll make a great mum” is the worstUsually based on the fact I can play around have fun messing about with other people’s kids. Yeah I’m great fun for 20 minutes but I’d also probably boot the kid out the window if it was my own.
I get this... Just because I work with kids people think I'm good with them. I might be, but that's because I know that I'm giving them back in a few hours! Plus other people's kids tend to behave better for me than they do their own parents. If I was dealing with tantrums on an hourly basis I probably wouldn't be as patient and lovely as I amOh my god “you’ll make a great mum” is the worstUsually based on the fact I can play around have fun messing about with other people’s kids. Yeah I’m great fun for 20 minutes but I’d also probably boot the kid out the window if it was my own.
I’ve had this based on the fact that I carry tissues in my handbag. I mean, I like a low bar but I think there’s probably a bit more to it …Oh my god “you’ll make a great mum” is the worstUsually based on the fact I can play around have fun messing about with other people’s kids. Yeah I’m great fun for 20 minutes but I’d also probably boot the kid out the window if it was my own.
Guys don’t have the pressure like we do though, he could be like that till he is 45 then finally sort himself out and have a family with a wife that’s a decade youngerDidn't know this thread existed! I'm also childfree. It's not that I actively went out of my way to NOT want kids, I just never felt myself wanting them and I'm happy with that. As I've got older (well, out of my 20s), I value my own space and time a lot more. I do have a partner but I also live alone and own my own home which I've worked hard to achieve and I don't want to wind up setting my career back and uprooting myself to go live in a sensible family home and deal with school gates politics instead
Something I can't stand is grown men who talk about "wanting kids someday" yet doing absolutely nothing to prepare themselves for it. I have a friend in his early 30s who lives in a dingy shared flat, smokes weed every day, doesn't take care of himself, doesn't save any money, usual stuff. He thinks he will have kids "one day". By that, he's assuming a woman will come along, sort his life out, and pop out a kid for him. Honestly, no thanks.
Yeah of course, they don't need to change a thing. The guys who live like that until 45 will never change. Just cemented the reasons why I don't want kids. There's too many women looking after children plus their useless manchild of a partnerGuys don’t have the pressure like we do though, he could be like that till he is 45 then finally sort himself out and have a family with a wife that’s a decade youngerSo easy for guys to have the best of both worlds. Plus no matter how much they want kids they never end up having to do the majority of the childcare.
I think in the future it’ll be easier to get as populations start to reach critical point..whether that’ll be in my lifetime I don’t knowYep, I asked my doctor for sterilisation options and she looked like I asked her to remove my lungs. It drives me nuts because I either have to constantly take the pill, ask my partner to use a condom every time or not have sex at all.
I even looked at the law for other European countries to get it done but they are all the same "a woman has to be over 40 or have a child". France has a law which allows any woman over the age of 18. But there are almost no doctors willing to do it if you are under the age of 40 or "childless".
The other option is to find a man who had or is willing to be sterilised. But so many men are frightened by it because they think that it will emasculate them.
It's not something I've explored but as I am at risk of having inherited and possibly passing on a nasty genetic condition I often wonder if I would be eligible for sterilisation if I asked for it. My partner is willing to have the snip but I think they are a bit funny about doing that on men who don't have children as well. I would like to not have to take the pill and have the fear of contraception failing!Yep, I asked my doctor for sterilisation options and she looked like I asked her to remove my lungs. It drives me nuts because I either have to constantly take the pill, ask my partner to use a condom every time or not have sex at all.
I even looked at the law for other European countries to get it done but they are all the same "a woman has to be over 40 or have a child". France has a law which allows any woman over the age of 18. But there are almost no doctors willing to do it if you are under the age of 40 or "childless".
The other option is to find a man who had or is willing to be sterilised. But so many men are frightened by it because they think that it will emasculate them.
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