I just mean that she's a very sweet woman, so the rare times where I did something really wrong - I was yelled at, but I was mostly told that when mommy tells me I can't do something it's for my own good, because she loves us, wants us to be protected. I was mostly always spoken to calmly - if I had emotional outburst when I was very small I was told mum is sad or disappointed because I hurt her feelings for x, y, z. - her parenting made me pretty well behaved. I rebelled and made life hard for my absent, authoritative, neglectful parent. - The more I grew up, the more I saw who was there for me even during the not so fun parts.i think it depends on what you mean by reasoning though. In the same way that “discipline” also has different forms.
i also think it depends on age. An 8 year old who has been disciplined properly as a toddler is more than capable of being reasoned with in certain circumstances. My mum always said that if you do the ground work when they’re little and they are taught proper boundaries then you will do very little “discipline” as they get older because you are able to say “pack it in” or give them the look without any further issue.
Obviously an older kid kicking their parents needs discipline but if you’ve got to the stage where your kid is hitting you then you probably aren’t reasoning or disciplining either way.