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Labour is just a contributing factor to me not wanting children. The main reason is that I do not like children.Tbh the thought of a life of motherhood horrifies me more than labour
not even with the promise of boarding school?
kidding obviously
I honestly wouldn’t have kids for a billion pounds which really is saying something because I once conceded that I would sleep with boris Johnson for a million pounds Same, labour fascinates me... that a body can grow a baby and adapt its shape to push a baby out (assuming no health problems etc)Tbh the thought of a life of motherhood horrifies me more than labour
But... nah, it's not for me thanks.
Would you get £2 million if you slept with BoJo then had his baby?!
Another thing that influences me to not have children is family genetics. Is anyone else the same?
My family has issues such as:
arthritis (not sure if it is the hereditary one though)
endometriosis (which can be hereditary)
Thyroid issues
High blood pressure
Weak jaw line/overbite (I hate to say it but I curse my parents for not getting me braces as a child. They would have been free through the nhs and would have not totally fixed but certainly improved my bite... Much harder to do as an adult and not only causes confidence issues when I'm reminded of it at the dentist but can be painful).
I would hate to potentially pass those things onto a child. When my mum was pregnant with me, she was told there was a chance I may have down syndrome. I do not. But that is something else I wouldn't be able to deal with. I wouldn't want a child with a disability/or an adult child that would be forever dependent. Is that selfish?
My family has issues such as:
arthritis (not sure if it is the hereditary one though)
endometriosis (which can be hereditary)
Thyroid issues
High blood pressure
Weak jaw line/overbite (I hate to say it but I curse my parents for not getting me braces as a child. They would have been free through the nhs and would have not totally fixed but certainly improved my bite... Much harder to do as an adult and not only causes confidence issues when I'm reminded of it at the dentist but can be painful).
I would hate to potentially pass those things onto a child. When my mum was pregnant with me, she was told there was a chance I may have down syndrome. I do not. But that is something else I wouldn't be able to deal with. I wouldn't want a child with a disability/or an adult child that would be forever dependent. Is that selfish?
Vom! Only thing worse than having a child is having boris’ child!!Would you get £2 million if you slept with BoJo then had his baby?!
I listen to her podcasts still I find her honestly so refreshing!! Kids are happy that is what matters and she isn’t going insane so everyone wins!
I find labour absolutely disgusting too (and breastfeeding if I’m honest). Just the fact that women are treated like total idiots and told bollocks like “your body’s designed for this!” when in fact it really isn’t, so many women used to die in labour, and 1 in 3 first time mums need forceps or ventouse. My SIL got told all these bullshit lies by NCT, then had forceps. When I mentioned the actual stats my MIL was like “oh really?”. No-one even gets told! And if you ask for an elective c-section, you get called too posh to push.
I’m sorry but if a man went in for a knee op and got told “there’s a 1/3 chance it won’t go as planned and you’ll tear from your knee to ankle”, they wouldn’t accept it. Yet women are meant to shut up and be grateful too.
I’m sorry but if a man went in for a knee op and got told “there’s a 1/3 chance it won’t go as planned and you’ll tear from your knee to ankle”, they wouldn’t accept it. Yet women are meant to shut up and be grateful too.
yes! And also the amount of times medical professionals don’t listen to women. My cousin’s baby’s literal head was coming out and the midwife was like “noo you’re not ready yet” my cousin was like “i already have a child I know how it feels!”
reading serena williams’ birth story just confirmed to me that doctors don’t listen to women.
one born every minute is like a horror movie to me, childbirth is both terrifying and undignified. i once (while tipsy) told a friend that if a situation ever horrifyingly arose where i was giving birth i would want to be in a room on my own because i wouldn’t want my partner or family seeing me like that. she said it was harsh and i apologised but i actually meant it
caesareans are a whole other level of terrifying too. i truly never realised how invasive they are until i watched the nest on bbc last year, when there’s a super graphic one. no thank you on all levels.
Yes, we found out 6 years ago that my dad has Huntington's Disease and I'm glad that I didn't have kids already as I would feel so guilty if I had unknowingly passed it on. Fortunately I know I am at risk now and it pretty much cemented my decision for me. Not content with having one genetic disorder, both me and my mum are being investigated for 2 more, my mum for a genetic heart condition and me for genetic hearing loss
that's not to mention all the minor genetic things we could pass on like my chin or my partners eyesight When I was little I asked my mum about babies/how they’re born etc and she explained it and apparently I asked her ‘why would anyone do that?’. So she never really expected grandchildrenreading serena williams’ birth story just confirmed to me that doctors don’t listen to women.
one born every minute is like a horror movie to me, childbirth is both terrifying and undignified. i once (while tipsy) told a friend that if a situation ever horrifyingly arose where i was giving birth i would want to be in a room on my own because i wouldn’t want my partner or family seeing me like that. she said it was harsh and i apologised but i actually meant it
caesareans are a whole other level of terrifying too. i truly never realised how invasive they are until i watched the nest on bbc last year, when there’s a super graphic one. no thank you on all levels.
I'm normally happy to be childfree but I did have a soppy moment earlier where I thought if I was younger I'd love to have loads of little babies with my adorable younger friend
He's in his 20s and I'm in my 40s, it must have been a funny 5 minutes!
He's in his 20s and I'm in my 40s, it must have been a funny 5 minutes!
Thanks for sharing posts about adult friendships changing as a result of a baby. I'm in a similar boat, one friend gave birth earlier this year and another friend is due early 2023. We're meeting up next week all 3 of us (I moved away) and they're probably going to be swapping notes on babies and there I'll be not knowing what to say. Already I feel like an outsider as I don't know/understand pregnancy things.
I'm very happy with my child free life. The only occasional moment I have is dreams of having a daughter and a relationship as amazing as I had with my Mum who died. It's not enough to change my mind though, I like my life as it is.
I'm very happy with my child free life. The only occasional moment I have is dreams of having a daughter and a relationship as amazing as I had with my Mum who died. It's not enough to change my mind though, I like my life as it is.
Saw this on the meme thread and thought you'd all appreciate it
duck meThat reminds me of a thread on mumsnet where someone said her kids friend always says please and thank you but her kids never say please and thank you and how can she get them to (kids were of an age to say please and thanks I think 5&7). Someone replied and said they taught their kids to say please and thank you by telling them to do basically give them something and say ‘say thank you’ or they ask for something and you say ‘say please’. OP replied saying that sounds ‘really harsh’
Are these folk for real.I work in a nursery with kids up to the age of 10 and I spend my day trying to teach basic pleases and thank yous to kids. They say "I want a drink" I say "you would like a drink PLEASE!". And whenever I hand them anything I automatically say "thank you Electric Dreams" on their behalf because I know it won't be forthcomingduck me
if they demand something I ask what other words they can use? P? Pl? Plea? They look at me blankly! It wouldn't surprise me in the slightest if parents have the mumsnet attitude of it offending the little darlings to be told to say please.
I can't tell you what a relief it is to see someone else say this.I've always thought this, and on the very few occasions I've voiced it to anyone else, they've stared at me like I've grown a second head. I really, really do not want to be someone's carer for the rest of my life, I don't want to deal with the stress and worry of having a disabled child no matter how rewarding those who do it claim it is, and down's especially knowing most of the time a lot of care is needed and they're going to outlive you...I just wouldn't even want to risk it
This has always been something that worries me too. You sometimes see elderly parents with an adult disabled child and it’s just heartbreaking. I can’t imagine being an older parent and not having had the kind of milestones you expect with a child - them growing up, gaining independence, building a life of their own. That and wondering what will happen to your child once you’re gone. The reality is nobody will love your child like you do and it must be devastating to think of your older child loosing their parents and then having to move into care and be looked after by strangers. Then you sometimes see really heartbreaking situations where other children have had to become carers too and it‘s all just so sad.
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