I know what it's like to feel suicidal and I know that ruminating thought, isolation and seeing no way forward can be a killer. It's not something I would wish on my worst enemy.
All I can say is, DowntoearthDawn, be incredibly thankful you've not walked in those shoes (that's an assumption, because someone who is in very good mental health and untouched by much experience of it usually says such flippant, unsympathetic things), because it is hell on earth, your nerve endings are screaming and you feel not only in emotional agony, but depression/anxiety can also make you very physically weak and exhausted too.
(Long-term insomniac - that's why I'm typing this at 3.30am!)