If that load of shite got her a book deal I'm going to send my Lydia only fools poem to a publisher 
Brummy Mummy #15 Emma Conway is smashing the Amazon chart one minute and Mickey’s face the next
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She has had to throw it away after years of service to blood, sweat, tears and snot!
My name is Emma
I've got big tits
In fact, I am a TIT
I write tit poems
I cannot lie
Well actually I can and do lie
Goodbye!
I've got big tits
In fact, I am a TIT
I write tit poems
I cannot lie
Well actually I can and do lie
Goodbye!
the being on to a winner thing about the top! Its such a plinky plonky childrens poem! Rhyming really obvious words! Like Adrian Mole when he constantly submits his tit poems to the BBC!An adult has never written that surely? She has got one of the children to write that! How bloody embarrassing. 
The way I understand it is the publishing company contacted her, clearly this is what they do if they think they can flog a few books and they came up with the idea of poems together. She didn't pitch the idea to them. I thought the publishing house would if had the common sense to have someone write it for her with a few of her ideas thrown in.
This is just embarrassing on a whole new level she does realise that this is going to get ripped apart when published and not just by tattle
This is just embarrassing on a whole new level she does realise that this is going to get ripped apart when published and not just by tattle
There was a brummy mum of 2
I know what your thinking who?
she takes pics in the bath
does a dance for laugh
and if you buy her book
you've been had.
I know what your thinking who?
she takes pics in the bath
does a dance for laugh
and if you buy her book
you've been had.
Plus, wasn't she a size 10 when they met?!
didn't have her "mum tum" when they met! What full grown. Adult. Woman. Calls. It. A. Tummy?! 
New thread idea #she’s not a poet, why doesn’t she know it
Sorry if it's been posted before, but the title doesn't even sound unique. This from 2018
Well that poem was actually quite hard to read. It lacked iambic pentameter (not that she will know what that means) but I remember it from my o’level english.
One that needs it to rhyme with Mummy!Plus, wasn't she a size 10 when they met?!
ive really enjoyed reading all of the poems on here. This is my rubbish attempt
My name is Emma I write poems what rhyme,
Hubby does all the childcare that’s. how. I . have. the. time.
I just google words that rhyme with tit,
to pad my poem out a bit.
”Ste, give the kids some tea”, “Ste, give the kids a bath”,
I need to post pictures of my wobbly bits, it’s all such a laugh.
My name is Emma I write poems what rhyme,
Hubby does all the childcare that’s. how. I . have. the. time.
I just google words that rhyme with tit,
to pad my poem out a bit.
”Ste, give the kids some tea”, “Ste, give the kids a bath”,
I need to post pictures of my wobbly bits, it’s all such a laugh.
tit - way to get your pre-orders cancelled 
What’s ironic is - if your ‘tummy’ doesn’t matter at all and everything’s great blah blah then why write a whole poem about it doing that thing when people talk about something they go on and on about it and then say how they’re not bothered like people who go on about how they aren’t insecure, are usually the most insecure. So done with this stupid fake body confidence
and ngl, it’s 2020. there’s bigger world issues than u being a mum and feeling sad or happy or whatever about having a body part everyone has of all the things that could be poetry topics - funny anecdotes from life, stories, nature etc
doing that thing when people talk about something they go on and on about it and then say how they’re not bothered like people who go on about how they aren’t insecure, are usually the most insecure. So done with this stupid fake body confidenceand ngl, it’s 2020. there’s bigger world issues than u being a mum and feeling sad or happy or whatever about having a body part everyone has
of all the things that could be poetry topics - funny anecdotes from life, stories, nature etcShe needs a ghost writer to write her poems.
Bless you! My aim on here was only ever to bring a little fun to the proceedings. Lighthearted humour is as deep as I goMrs Briggs, I love how you are still here despite the scare tactics!! Keep making us laugh
XOk - I’m running bets on the likelihood of their being a boob poem, or two, or 3....What’s ironic is - if your ‘tummy’ doesn’t matter at all and everything’s great blah blah then why write a whole poem about it
and ngl, it’s 2020. there’s bigger world issues than u being a mum and feeling sad or happy or whatever about having a body part everyone has
However, I am chanting/praying/sacrificing chickens etc. to all available Gods that there isn’t one about her sweaty fanny foofah
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Bloody hell I think my pretentious over the top teenage poetry was better than brummy's effort!
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