Brummy Mummy #15 Emma Conway is smashing the Amazon chart one minute and Mickey’s face the next

[coconochanel]

So the local paper have done a story on her book and quoted one of her poems! Is that the same local paper that also ran the story of her saying she wanted to smash her husband's face in? I read the first few lines of the poem but couldn't bear to carry on as it's that bloody cringe!

Post the poem plz

 

[Frogfrogfrog]

The article is called ‘poetry in motions’. I work in healthcare and some people use ‘motions’ to describe bowel movements. Is this the journalists sneaky way of saying they think the poem is

 

[Good Egg]

The article is called ‘poetry in motions’. I work in healthcare and some people use ‘motions’ to describe bowel movements. Is this the journalists sneaky way of saying they think the poem is

Shooketh

 

[petitspois]

Sweet Jesus, it’s awful. Like something sent into ‘take a break’ magazine but rejected

 

[yellow_daisies]

I didn't want to, but I had to look. It. Is. Shocking. I'm actually shooketh at how bad it is. Nice to see that Nanny San is proud of her being in the paper, she must have missed her last feature...

 

[Leascarle]

I had to stop reading it bored me

 

[bedtimereader]

She acts like she's shocked and flattered.....she'll have sent them the bloody press release herself. As for the poem, how utterly embarrassing.

 

[Emlii]

Lol that poem is absolutely dreadful!!

 

[Pinko]

Why does she have to mention her tits all the time!!!! Honestly she mentions them 4 times or just about in that poem!!!

And this is the woman who calls herself a prude!

 

[Emlii]

My fave line
‘So next time when you see your tum...’
Shouldn’t it be ‘next time you see your tum’? Makes much more sense

And it’s repetitive, But not intentional. Just doesn’t work x

 

[Suzesnooze]

Post the poem plz

Prepare to cringe!

Shouldn't it be 'tights go right up to my tits' not tit?!

 

[Laur91]

She repeats so many of the words multiple times it just looks so lazy! Says ‘that’s a win’ twice. Rhymes tits with bits multiple times. It’s like she got half way and thought ‘duck this isn’t as easy as it looked’ and just gave up.

 

[ayeayecaptain]

Bloody. Hell.

 

[coconochanel]

Prepare to cringe!

Shouldn't it be 'tights go right up to my tits' not tit?!

Thanks hun. Bloody hell what a load of crap and yes it should say 'goes right up to my tits not tit?'

 

[Gl1tt3rUn1c0rn]

Guys I am shooketh. I’m going to need some minging pyjamas and a binge watch of real housewives of shitsville to get over that ‘poem’. I was going to ask the opinion of my offspring who is doing A level English but didn’t want to scar them for life.

 

[petitspois]

And- she banged on about having work to do while Ethan was off ill then promptly had another day off!

 

[Noodlecat]

The Poem. Is. Just. Bloody. Awful. And "Didn't stop me from finding a man"??? Wow, she IS from the 1950s.

 

[Suzesnooze]

And- she banged on about having work to do while Ethan was off ill then promptly had another day off!

Oh no..she was working today filming a vlog with Nanny San! The last vlog they did together at Costco was one of her most favourite vlogs EVER! God knows why as it was bloody boring!

Presume Grandad Rog was looking after the boy then?!

 

[bsw123]

That poem... omg..
It’s not even funny in the slightest
IM SO EMBARRASSED FOR HER

 

[cushtybert]

There was an old lady from brum

Who has a weird obsession with tit by Ray Dunn

Her cupboards are heaving

Mickeys bank card is still grieving

Yet the saggy old trout still shops on