Boris Johnson #3

[Django]

Imagine inviting 100 people to a party and only 30 rocking up

 

[Miss Begotten]

And the new parents went also partying last Thursday in Mayfair.
Carrie wasn't wearing her wedding ring.

Why does she need to wear her wedding ring when she’s carrying the fat useless bastard’s bollocks around in her designer handbag?

I cannot believe the smirking piece of shit actually expects us to believe that we need to wait for the ‘independent’ enquiry to find out whether he went to ANOTHER party in his own garden.
I would never wish death on anyone, but I can’t help hoping he has a terrible accident and his dick falls off.

 

[Reverend]

Well to the surprise of absolutely noone including us Irish, Biden has shot down Boris in flames as a result of Brexit and the good Friday agreement.

They are still banging on the about Pacific trade deal they are putting into place, despite the fact that the New Zealand PM says if they break the NI protocol she will veto their attempts to join.

I have never disliked a Prime Minister more than Johnson. He just gets me angry for his incompetence, and general lack of care for anyone he believes is beneath him.

 

[Miss Begotten]

Crocodile tears from Stratton - wtf did she expect? Makes me absolutely sick to my stomach what they (Tories) have done over the pandemic, and that's quite leaving aside all the austerity/cuts to services etc etc. But that Stratton woman has even enraged Mr. Weaver tonight.

She is appalling, but she’s a patsy. Johnson doesn’t give a shit about her or anyone else, unless they’re useful to him. She’s just the latest idiot he’s thrown under a bus to save his sorry arse.
The buck stops with him.
How many people could have a party going on in their own house and not fucking know about it? And we’re supposed to take their word for it?

Has anyone else heard the allegations that Simon Case, who has been asked to investigate Schroedinger’s party was actually a guest at that selfsame party? They are taking the piss with knobs on.

 

[Miss Begotten]

I always think to myself Godspeed Carrie
But then again she treats wallpaper like an aphrodisiac.

She’s every bit as much of a cunt as her current husband. Imagine letting that fat ugly twat fuck you in his house while his wife was undergoing cancer treatment, and still having the brass balls to think she’s something special.
I hope she ends up in a council flat on Universal Credit.

 

[Reverend]

It's in Private Eye this week that the Pope wants an explanation from Cardinal Nicholls of how exactly Johnson was allowed to marry in Westminster Cathedral. The main reason being that someone who procures an abortion is automatically excommunicated and not allowed to take part in catholic ceremonies. I bet Johnson got someone to bung a few quid to get around it.

 

[Falkor]

I wish Rory Stewart had won the leadership election, I think we'd be in a much, much better place.

Going back further, if David Miliband had beaten Ed I think the country would also be in a better place.

 

[bubbadabut]

Baby's name is Romy Iris.

Quite appropriate. Bet it won't be long before Bojo's irises are roaming elsewhere again.

 

[GinBear]

And where the f are the Opposition? Supine and silent ..If I were Starmer I'd re activate Emily Thornberry and give her one mission ..Destroy Boris ! Shes the only one with charisma wit and delivery to take him on ..he'd be terrified .

 

[lalalanded]

I don't know how he has the bloody balls to condemn the racist abuse some of the England players are getting.

 

[Miss Begotten]

Holly from This Morning saying it’s cute he has a hobby. Bore off silly moo

Fucksake. Stupid cow.
Still, I suppose that compared to her best mate Phil’s hobby, painting probably does seem cute.

 

[L3moning]

As Boris himself said on Have I Got News For You once, the problem is that its quite possible that behind the carefully crafted public persona of a blithering idiot there is, in fact, a blithering idiot.

Many a true word is spoken in jest, as they say.

 

[Miss Begotten]

I would have loved to have been a fly on the wall when this particular gem came to light.

Exclusive: Boris Johnson’s callous jibe about married life with Carrie Symonds

Boris Johnson’s record as a man unscrupulous in both public and private life is second to none. Recent polls suggest a swing away from the Tories, so is the public finally demonstrating a degree of buyer’s remorse?

www.theneweuropean.co.uk

The New European has been told that the prime minister was asked how family life with his new wife and mother to his child Carrie Symonds was going. His reported answer, that he was experiencing “buyer’s remorse” over the union, astonished some of those present.

Apparently Prime Minister Carrie has started referring to Johnson as her “first husband”.
What a fine example to us plebs they are.

 

[Jinx2019]

Where is Boris?! Labour have KS out calling for plan B and they bring Javid to tell us all will be normal by Christmas. Why are people not concerned that the PM is thought too much of a liability to do a live interview for channels beyond the BBC?!

 

[PeteM]

You voted for a man who hides in a fridge.

 

[monga]

Peston getting his tuppence worth

 

[Annabanana40]

Don’t know what website but my husband just read out to me that Bawjaws was boffing SamCam.

If true, where did it all go wrong for her? David “Face like a freshly wanked cock” Cameron and “Sack of custard” Johnson.

If that's true she officially has the worst taste of any woman alive.

 

[Miss Begotten]

Listening to his conference speech and majorly losing the will to live. How did we get here

You mean you weren’t bowled over by his Churchillian oratory, his hilarious repartee ( referring to the poison dwarf as Jon Bon Govey after he graced the dance floor last night ) and his insistence that he and his fascist colleagues actually belonged to “the most, hip, happening party in the world’“?
Come on now, who gives a shit about all the people who died of COVID, the fuel shortages, the clusterfuck of Brexit, empty shelves in the supermarket, stealing 20 quid a week from the poorest people in the country and the fucking pisstake of raising taxes for the lowest paid while allowing gangsters and dodgy companies to squirrel their money away?
These people are seriously groovy. Get with it.

 

[Ennui]

Why would you go out jogging in a SHIRT

Running away from his latest illicit shag after her husband came home early.

 

[monga]

That’s true ! I saw this and immediately thought of Carrie