The smooch pic with hand on chest and the DP black tassel shoes! Two more bingo ticks I think?!
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All I have to add here is Alice - TAKE OFF THE OURA RING
I actually burst out laughing at this. You need inspo from someone your own shape and size, Al. No wonder she looks so awful.
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hi Alice!
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Why not just fly business class if you can spend that much on a dress that you will never wear again? Also I recall during pandemic she was asking for donations on PayPal. To fund all her expensive dresses I wonder
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This is hilariousI actually burst out laughing at this. You need inspo from someone your own shape and size, Al. No wonder she looks so awful.
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and £1100 or so for a frock that doesn’t suit you is so much of a bargain. 
She has the absolute reverse body height/shape/proportions to Kate.
Why not just stand nicely and have a photo where the bride is the main star? She’s knocked the bride sideways, spoiled the flow of the bride’s dress and ruined what could have been a lovely photo of them.
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This!!
Why can’t she pop it on her right hand. You must be able to change the settings.
Why does every caption have to be such a word salad? Everyone she meets is the most amazing, special, beautiful human on the planet.
duck. Right. Off.
duck. Right. Off.
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“Marrying in the most beautiful way” what does that even meaaaan 
Classic narcissism right there.
Why is she grabbing the bride like that? I would be like ‘get your grubby hands and orange face off my white dress head!’
Think this is what it means“Marrying in the most beautiful way” what does that even meaaaan
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I. Have. No. Words. (It was bad the first time we saw this outfit. This is even worse!)
Also - I reckon some sneaky hair extensions have been added over recent days.
Also - I reckon some sneaky hair extensions have been added over recent days.
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Haha it's absolutely awful. The boots and glasses look particularly fuckin ridiculous!
Those boots need to be burned
100% extensions or clip ins in. Very voluminous!
Okay I’m convinced now that this brand has to be trolling people with more money than sense. The brand name is ridiculous and the name of the dress style is unhinged. There can be no other explanation for this nonsense.
Vom 
Vom 
Vom
Vom Vom
Who is like this?? Seriously am I just dead inside? I love my mates but I don’t need to video call them like a love sick puppy every few days
The designer behind Vampire's Wife is the wife of Nick Cave a musician, so the name is a pun about her. He sang Where the Wild Roses Grow, a duet with Kylie Minogue.
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I feel quite sorry for Paddy. If I was facetiming from bed on holiday and posting things like that I think my husband would be quite put out. It's really weird.
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