Adam the Woo #13 Jenn Tracker, but with a penis

[dirtnap101]

I was busy all day, just catching up. How is this guy in downtown Boston? I thought he was tired of people and big cities and was going to take a "road trip" back home. Instead he's obsessed with the greater Boston area.

Adam drags himself to Cheers? Is there any place more touristy and overdone than Cheers? And this guy walks in and is surprised that Cheers is full of Cheers pictures and memorabilia?

Seriously what is Adam doing? Flies to Salem for Halloween, drives to Vermont for Beetlejuice locations, and now he's just spending days wandering around Boston malls, and downtown Boston, with no plan or strategy, just completely aimless. Manhole covers and Coke trucks? I mean, wow.

He's super excited to see the Boston Tea Party ship, I mean he coms alive and says it's so cool. He then gets a shot from above the boat, says "Look at this, you can go on the boat, and there's some period guys dressed in the period garb down there", and then he abruptly moves on - I guess people who plan ahead and research can go on the boat, Adam.

Then suddenly his "friend" who did nothing to guide him around Salem the other day shows up, and does nothing to guide him around Boston, too!

I guess Adam isn't starting today for his end of the year weight loss push, as he enjoys pizza and a giant chocolate lobster roll pastry. Amazingly, Adam doesn't like his dessert. He's a complete idiot, his description of why he doesn't like it is literally the definition of it. And this after his voiceover and awful camerawork inside the store talking about how it was so hard to choose but he finally landed and something he was interested in.

Adam called this "quite the piping hot caffeinated beverage in a big tea cup, well, in a big coffee cup right here". Adam doesn't know what a teapot looks like?

 

[2020planner]

Umm...ok? Fishing for internet friends again, David?

 

[dirtnap101]

The good news about today's vlog is that it's only 21 minutes long.

The bad news is literally everything else.

Adam "wanted to drive", so he headed to Daytona Beach and got coffee at that Buc-ees, and then figured heck it, I'll drive up to St. Augustine and visit that Buc-ees as well, because who doesn't need two gas station/mini-Costcos in one day? Also, he manages to not get gas at either of them

Adam's too lazy to document his whole day so he just starts the camera late in the afternoon as he's looking to tour the St. Augustine Buc-ees and eat some healthy dinner. Otherwise, he'd have to actually spend time editing, and it's so much easier for him to just stand there and tell us about his day than show us. What else would you expect from a guy who can't be bothered to insert the actual jpg from his phone into the video and instead just holds the phone up to the camera.

He goes inside and films everything on offer, dutifully reading each sign. Then it turns into another "Adam gorges himself on fast food off the hood of his car in a parking lot" vlog.

Adam's nutritious, healthy dinner at Buc-ees:

• A bag of Beaver chips (500 calories)
• A brisket sandwich (680 calories)
• A beef burrito (740 calories)
• A fried apple pie (470 calories)

We are not not even 7 minutes into the 20 minute vlog, and the rest of it is almost exclusively Adam stuffing his face on camera in the parking lot, a total of 2400 calories. He goes into Buc-ees and orders all this crap full of sodium, and buys absolutely nothing to drink. He then goes into his car and finds a 3/4 full bottle of warm water to wash this all down.

Honestly, I had to listen but not watch while he was eating, because the visual is just disgusting. He concedes that he didn't need to buy the burrito as the brisket is so good and filling. He then finishes the brisket and immediately eats the burrito (and the chips and the pie) anyway

He stops at the Daytona Beach Buc-ees AGAIN on the way home for coffee, and gets a bag of Beaver Nuggets to bring home, along with some chewy praline fudge. After claiming this was to bring home for another time, and even though he just ate 2400 calories or crap including a fried apple pie, he can't resist and dives into the chewy praline fudge. Alas, Adam is very disappointed as it's "way too sweet". He probably ate the whole bag of Beaver Nuggets as well.

Hurr durr, I'm 12 years old:

Guaranteed that he will visit Buc-ees in Tennessee in the next 3-4 months:

 

[scopeyscope]

I just saw the abandoned resort video, I started laughing when he started running when the person was in there.

He is a wimp. He will never regain his glory days. May as well hang up the abandoned thing anyway because NO channel gets anywhere near what The Proper People can do. Just like no one does abandoned history like Bright Sun Films

 

[Tawnie]

I think that word is "mukbang". I learned it over on the Paging Mr. Morrow discussion pages.

Yes, that is a mukbang. He does not allow himself sweet treats but he does eat fried apple pie. He’s not big on BBQ but he declares buccees the best bbq. Dude has never been to Franklins in Austin or The Shed in Mississippi. He does not know BBQ. He is a frustrating manchild of a human being.

He also has ZERO understanding of how employee stock purchases work. I would love to see him survive a real job at his age. He would not last one hour.

 

[Lambyo]

@dirtnap101 thanks for the recap! That would explain the IG post I read before coming on here.

With Paging Mr Moron's lease also up in this December could these two be roommates as some have suggested? Some would Wager it could happen.

Also dirtnap101 thanks for posting the wiki link! Gotta keep up with these wooisms.

View attachment 2523536

“Celebration, Florida - where even the leaves aren’t real”.

 

[2020planner]

Thanks as always for the recap. Wow. We knew he was going to really have to dig into his plethora of woopeats to get through October since "his" Rays lost, but this is even worse than I predicted.

This is just pathetic. Arent we due for another walk and talk about Adams plans for 2024 and how life is so hard.

View attachment 2531937

Whyyyyy do I want to punch that face so hard?!?!?!

 

[2020planner]

What a fucking jackass. Um, usually if I-4 is shut down, it means something BAD happened, Woo.

A firefighter died in a crash.

https://www.wfla.com/news/polk-county/deadly-crash-blocks-traffic-on-i-4-in-polk-county/

And then he parks there and films the empty road??? Where the hell is he at to get this angle?!?! Parked on the side of I-4 outside of his car?
For real?

But yeah, glad it's "smooth sailing" for you, Woo.

 

[VloggerCritic]

Yeah he clearly doesn't need to leave the US it would just be a boring train wreck.

 

[aliciavlnf4]

A comment from today’s vlog:

Um, you can start by stop making these proclamations on your vlogs regarding your weight loss, cutting back on Disney/theme parks, and so on. By now, we know that you’re not a “man” of your word. It’s more of you doing what you want by winging it in each daily vlog while your delusional Woovians kiss up to you in the comments section. Let’s see how long this “daily” giveaway lasts.

 

[2020planner]

If you look closely, he does this in almost every video. The insane thing is that he hardly ever uses any of those actual poses, but he goes through the motions AND LEAVES ALL THE FOOTAGE IN THE FINAL EDIT!

He is so in love with himself. All those stupid poses just prove it - and the fact that he leaves all that in. He doesn't need to do ANY of that.
He's in love with his face.

Gross.

 

[DukeOfKent]

The coast-to-coast parks in the same day sounds like a fun idea if it's executed well. I'm picturing quick cuts between the similar attractions in each park intercut with commentary comparing them. I haven't watched yet (not sure if I'll watch at all), but my guess is that Adam didn't do it like that and instead just phoned it in the way he's been doing for the past few years now.

Some of those comments in that group are unhinged. Got to love when someone tells you you are stupid using “your” instead of “you’re”
View attachment 2602156View attachment 2602157

Mixing up your/you're is my all-time pet peeve, and there's a special type of irony associated with trying to insult someone by telling them "your [sic] stupid."

These people are mentally ill.
(From an Adam the Woo fan page on Facebook)
View attachment 2602666

This just makes me sad. There is SO much more to the world than celebrity worship, and Adam's not even a "real" celebrity! These redacted individuals need to aim higher with their dreams.

 

[2020planner]

Thanks for the votes, everyone!

Shouldn’t there be a ? after penis

Yes - there was an alternate I submitted too.

 

[PoorKid]

WAITWAITWAITWAITWAIT! Are you seriously telling me that this double-wide douchecanoe left historical Salem, MA to drive to beautiful Vermont and then, instead of carrying on with a road trip, he drove back to see SAUGUS, MA!?!? SAUGUS? For real? And then just wanders up and down Rt. 1? Did he show viewers the closed down Barnes and Noble? Or where a Friendly's used to be? Or the Square One Mall where only old people go and that's just to get their steps in when the weather is bad? This guy's energy and motivation ... his parents need to check him in for evaluation and meds.

 

[robotmonster]

Urgent news broadcast for Mr. Woo. McDonald's is eliminating the McFlurry spoon. This is sad news for all ten-year-olds. Hurry Woo, hurry to all the McDonald's in a 500-mile radius and snatch as many as possible. Bribe an employee to slip you a case. Make room in that magic closet of wonders. This will be the one. This will be your retirement goldmine.

 

[Century20]

Adam: "Not doing horrible with the diet, but not crushing it."

 

[CactusMouse]

You can really see the weight starting to come back on to him, too.
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I love seeing puffy Woo again!! It brings down his sleaze and smugness a little. All those PSLs are catching up to him.

Does this yahoo own a jacket? Maybe he can do a boring vlog about coat shopping. A jacket or coat might be nice the next time he drives coast-to-coast through a snowstorm.

I am so glad Halloween is finally here, so David wil STFU about it! What will his next obsession be?

 

[CactusMouse]

Adam said he has thick skin? Thick head, maybe.

 

[Century20]

The Four Griftors of the Apocalypse

WINNER!!!!! I gift you this, but please note it only burns at one end.

 

[dirtnap101]

This is as low effort, as lazy, as Adam can get. Celebration intro>Fast Food>Walking around Disney Springs and a movie. You can tell from the 18 minute length that he struggled to film something but his OCD about daily vlogging wouldn't permit him to take a day off.

I'm pretty sure one of us called it when McDonald's announced that Boo Buckets would be back this year...and look who is eating such a healthy meal on the hood of his car in a parking lot?

Does Adam realize that "Lake Rianhard" is man-made as he poses all sorts of questions about what's "bubbling up" and all that?

After he eats his Boo Bucket, he again mentions that Dasani water is "salty". He goes into a crowded store at Disney Springs and once again comments when someone near him happens to cough that ne needs to get away from them. Adam, you do realize that Pre-Covid, people did cough, right? Just move away, no need to mention it every time.

He walks around Disney Springs to pad the total time of the vlog, sees the movie and drive home. Completely pointless to film any of this.