Thank you so much girls. It’s so frustrating isn’t it. I know I have to be positive but I feel so annoyed that this journey is such a bumpy one! Truth be told I don’t think I feel TOO much of an emotional connection to what was in there, (though this morning’s tears would suggest otherwise). I think it’s just emotionally and physically draining. We’re built to do this why can’t it just happen!! (Sorry being a bit self indulgent now ha)
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Looks like a lot of us have had chemicals this month!
I think going forward I'm really going to try waiting longer to test, it's easier said than done but I had clear positives on 3 different brands over a few days including a digital with weeks and still ended up bleeding and getting a negative. Next time I'm late I'll try to wait until I'm at least 5 days late then I can live in ignorant bliss if i get a late period
I think going forward I'm really going to try waiting longer to test, it's easier said than done but I had clear positives on 3 different brands over a few days including a digital with weeks and still ended up bleeding and getting a negative. Next time I'm late I'll try to wait until I'm at least 5 days late then I can live in ignorant bliss if i get a late period
I think you’re right, the early tests are a blessing and a curse.Looks like a lot of us have had chemicals this month!
I think going forward I'm really going to try waiting longer to test, it's easier said than done but I had clear positives on 3 different brands over a few days including a digital with weeks and still ended up bleeding and getting a negative. Next time I'm late I'll try to wait until I'm at least 5 days late then I can live in ignorant bliss if i get a late period
I want to wait until I am late to test but my cycles are so irregular 
they’ve ranged from 31 days to 46 days. (This one has been 56 but I’m not counting it as it’s first cycle post MC).
I’d been hoping to give up ovulation testing and try and relax more but then I will really have no idea if I’m late or not. Also I do seem to have a specific symptom which I’ve now had both times that I think would clue me in tbf even if I don’t test early. (Very painful congested sinuses - weird I know but had it both times from about 8 dpo. Never had it otherwise and gone as soon as I’ve started bleeding.)
I really struggle to find balance between wanting to do as much as possible to up our chances and not letting it take over my life.
they’ve ranged from 31 days to 46 days. (This one has been 56 but I’m not counting it as it’s first cycle post MC).I’d been hoping to give up ovulation testing and try and relax more but then I will really have no idea if I’m late or not. Also I do seem to have a specific symptom which I’ve now had both times that I think would clue me in tbf even if I don’t test early. (Very painful congested sinuses - weird I know but had it both times from about 8 dpo. Never had it otherwise and gone as soon as I’ve started bleeding.)
I really struggle to find balance between wanting to do as much as possible to up our chances and not letting it take over my life.
Does anyone else have a weird pinching feeling around ovulation day? I’ve never had any ovulation symptoms before so now I’m freaking myself out! 
I had a pop when I ovulated, on the left side. Like when you flick your finger out of your mouth kind of feeling and sound!Does anyone else have a weird pinching feeling around ovulation day? I’ve never had any ovulation symptoms before so now I’m freaking myself out!
I don’t think I’ve ever had ovulation symptoms but I do get random cramps and twinges throughout my cycle. Would love to be able to see inside my uterus and see what’s actually going on 
I am 7dpo and have caught another stinking cold off of my lovely son after just getting over the last one he gave me. You know you’re obsessed when you start googling if having a cold in TWW can be a symptom.
I am 7dpo and have caught another stinking cold off of my lovely son after just getting over the last one he gave me. You know you’re obsessed when you start googling if having a cold in TWW can be a symptom.
Ugh honestly I've googled the most obscure things during the TWW! "Do your nails break easily in early pregnancy" hahaI don’t think I’ve ever had ovulation symptoms but I do get random cramps and twinges throughout my cycle. Would love to be able to see inside my uterus and see what’s actually going on
I am 7dpo and have caught another stinking cold off of my lovely son after just getting over the last one he gave me. You know you’re obsessed when you start googling if having a cold in TWW can be a symptom.
I'm going to try my best not to symptom spot, or test early this month. After I felt so certain I was pregnant last cycle, I think it's just best for me mentally to switch off from it until I have a reason to test
Sending love to everyone that's currently having a hard time or struggling - you'll get through this
So sorry to hear about some of the chemicals. I hope you are all doing ok and looking after yourselves.
I’m 10DPO and normally due AF on 12DPO, battling with myself whether I should go out and buy a FRER. Had my coat on to walk to boots yesterday and decided not to do it to myself in the last moment! Like you said, the early tests are a blessing and a curse.
I’m 10DPO and normally due AF on 12DPO, battling with myself whether I should go out and buy a FRER. Had my coat on to walk to boots yesterday and decided not to do it to myself in the last moment! Like you said, the early tests are a blessing and a curse.
Hi all 
first time posting but I've been following this thread for a little while and have found it so helpful reading everyone's messages on here. Currently 5/6DPO after a chemical last month and finding this wait really tricky but trying to keep busy.
first time posting but I've been following this thread for a little while and have found it so helpful reading everyone's messages on here. Currently 5/6DPO after a chemical last month and finding this wait really tricky but trying to keep busy.I'm not sure if this is the right thread or not but looking for some unbiased perspective on my circumstances:
In short I've got a daughter who was conceived (very luckily) with no bother or complications. After her I went on to miscarry 5 times over a period of years, I did find them as most people do both physically and emotionally hard. My husband was good, but he's not the emotional sort and I know it didn't affect him in the way it affected me - he didn't like the way it impacted me if that makes sense. Drs kept dismissing there was an issue because I already had a daughter until loss number 4. when I had investigations done, they found a womb abnormality where by I had a solid wall separating the womb in two - the consultant couldn't fathom how I had conceived a child and said if he'd seen me not knowing he would have said I'd be highly unlikely to carry a child. anyway summer 2019 I had the op to break the wall down.. was advised to leave it a few months to heal but the consultant was confident and said come see me next year with your baby.. we started trying again at the Christmas but by the time COVID hit in the March we just stopped. my husband became quite depressed as he had work issues and we basically stopped intercourse. I fell pregnant once in the spring but it was a chemical pregnancy (all my other losses have been at 10-12 weeks). Last year with my husband depressed, lack of trying etc I got fed up of putting my life on hold for another child, enrolled in a course in college and fast forward to this year I'm now in university... my husband is now better mentally (although winter is always hard for him because he has SAD). I'm worried that I've gone along with the course, now in uni etc as a distraction and I'll wake up in 3 years time and my one child will be double digits, my husband will be mid 40's (I'm 10 years younger than him) and I'll have missed the boat - husband never wanted to be "an old dad" and before the losses would say he didn't want anymore children after turning 40, which he then stopped saying as we approached that milestone for him and I was still in the middle of my miscarriage.
Do I learn to be happy with my one miracle child (who I am honestly so grateful for) or do I give it one more go before that chapter closes? I just feel like after my operation I didn't give it a solid go (pretty much 3 months and caught on the 3rd which we lost straight away). or is a 8-9 year age gap too big anyway..
In short I've got a daughter who was conceived (very luckily) with no bother or complications. After her I went on to miscarry 5 times over a period of years, I did find them as most people do both physically and emotionally hard. My husband was good, but he's not the emotional sort and I know it didn't affect him in the way it affected me - he didn't like the way it impacted me if that makes sense. Drs kept dismissing there was an issue because I already had a daughter until loss number 4. when I had investigations done, they found a womb abnormality where by I had a solid wall separating the womb in two - the consultant couldn't fathom how I had conceived a child and said if he'd seen me not knowing he would have said I'd be highly unlikely to carry a child. anyway summer 2019 I had the op to break the wall down.. was advised to leave it a few months to heal but the consultant was confident and said come see me next year with your baby.. we started trying again at the Christmas but by the time COVID hit in the March we just stopped. my husband became quite depressed as he had work issues and we basically stopped intercourse. I fell pregnant once in the spring but it was a chemical pregnancy (all my other losses have been at 10-12 weeks). Last year with my husband depressed, lack of trying etc I got fed up of putting my life on hold for another child, enrolled in a course in college and fast forward to this year I'm now in university... my husband is now better mentally (although winter is always hard for him because he has SAD). I'm worried that I've gone along with the course, now in uni etc as a distraction and I'll wake up in 3 years time and my one child will be double digits, my husband will be mid 40's (I'm 10 years younger than him) and I'll have missed the boat - husband never wanted to be "an old dad" and before the losses would say he didn't want anymore children after turning 40, which he then stopped saying as we approached that milestone for him and I was still in the middle of my miscarriage.
Do I learn to be happy with my one miracle child (who I am honestly so grateful for) or do I give it one more go before that chapter closes? I just feel like after my operation I didn't give it a solid go (pretty much 3 months and caught on the 3rd which we lost straight away). or is a 8-9 year age gap too big anyway..
Wasn’t sure if this was the right place to post
but went for a smear today and ended up walking out of the clinic with a faint positive and a negative test
told to repeat tests over the next few days but first thing on a morning
anyone else had this experience??
but went for a smear today and ended up walking out of the clinic with a faint positive and a negative test
told to repeat tests over the next few days but first thing on a morning
anyone else had this experience??
Oh that's so much to consider. Poor you having to think about it all.
If you were to become pregnant would you have to end your course or would you carry on? Would you lose out a lot financially if you packed in?
Do you know where your husband stands on the matter? Is it something you've discussed recently?
It's clear from your post that a big part of you wants to try again. For what it's worth I don't think you should let any age gap put you off. I'd say there are probably pros and cons to any age gap. I think you need to sit down with your husband and have a good chat about how you both feel about it.
Do you think you could set yourself a time frame without it causing you too much stress? Say you'll try again, but if it hasn't happened by X date then you'll stop and accept that chapter is closed. Some people might find it helps, but I get that for some it might be too much pressure.
Thank you so much...
That's something I probably missed out but my husband doesn't really like to talk about it - it causes a lot of tension and when I confronted him recently about him not being open about talking about it he said its because he's worried how I'd be if l lost again - I sort of believe him, but I'm not sure. He also says that I need to lose weight/ get fitter... during the last 18 months I have gone up a size to a 14 and stopped going to the gym so only really walk the dogs now. He says this from a health not aesthetic perspective btw - a close friend of ours is a bigger lady and had terrible problems with her back after she had her babies.... Anyway I feel like he deflects a lot and I can be sure every time I try to bring it up he'll either walk away, change the subject or basically close it down within 3 mins and say unhelpful things like "talk about this? we've done nothing but talk about this for 6 years" which I think is unfair. I suppose deep down he doesn't want to go again really but won't say and actually I also know if I really pushed he would - I'm just not sure I want to go through it all again myself.
The time frame idea is really good. I could have a break from my course and go back to it - they've actually talked a lot about people having to take time out due to pregnancy etc so in that sense it could be worked out.
thanks so much - just putting it all down really helps xx
I've had similar issues with my husband. My first pregnancy was molar. I was quite poorly, and the whole thing just went on for ages and was quite stressful. My husband has quite bad health anxiety, and he constantly imagined the worst outcome from it all. After my second pregnancy was smooth sailing and healthy he thought that was our good luck done with, and we shouldn't try again because it couldn't possibly go right.
It's taken a lot of talking to make him see that yes, it could go tits up again, but equally it could be fine and we could end up with another healthy child. I think some men struggle to know what to do when they see us suffering, and the easiest thing is just for them to ignore the situation and hope it goes away.
My big worry is that if we are successful then something goes wrong, he'll put his foot down and refuse to try again.
You've hit the nail on the head there - you're so right, men do ignore and hope it just goes away.. your husband sounds a lot like my husband - he also has anxiety about health etc, hence the whole he wants me to get fitter to become pregnant - he's very much of the mind set that you should be in optimum health, which lets face it isn't always bloody easy especially straight after a global pandemic.
Sorry to hear about your molar pregnancy, that must have been awful for you. I'm not sure if I'm just dishing out unhelpful statistics though, but women are most likely to have a negative pregnancy the first time and the fact you've gone on to have a healthy baby should be reassuring. But I do get the fear - before loss etc the ignorance was pure bliss wasn't it.
Oh guys, I have started lightly spotting so I guess AF wants to put me out of my misery a bit earlier than usual. I’m heartbroken as I’d really gotten my hopes up for this cycle.
Im with you all regarding our significant others, they can make things tough. My partner believes if it’s meant to happen it will, but im way too much of a control freak to be that relaxed I won’t even tell him now that I’ve got AF, he wouldn’t even really understand why im so sad cause his attitude is ‘oh well, there’s always next time!’
Im with you all regarding our significant others, they can make things tough. My partner believes if it’s meant to happen it will, but im way too much of a control freak to be that relaxed
I won’t even tell him now that I’ve got AF, he wouldn’t even really understand why im so sad cause his attitude is ‘oh well, there’s always next time!’Sorry to hear that - hopefully next month will be your month, the wait is so hardOh guys, I have started lightly spotting so I guess AF wants to put me out of my misery a bit earlier than usual. I’m heartbroken as I’d really gotten my hopes up for this cycle.
Im with you all regarding our significant others, they can make things tough. My partner believes if it’s meant to happen it will, but im way too much of a control freak to be that relaxed
Men are bloody difficult!!
Thank youSorry to hear that - hopefully next month will be your month, the wait is so hard
Men are bloody difficult!!
By the way, on your earlier question. Big age gaps are good! There is very big age gaps between me and my siblings (like almost 2 decades between me and my youngest brother!) and I love our family dynamic! I know it’s not for everyone but there’s nothing in the rule book that says you have to have small age gaps
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