Tiffany Thinks #9

[Lolaj]

OMG. I think she did me in after today's vlog. Idk if I can handle it anymore, why do I want to smash something after watching her ?

 

[SueB]

Hi! This is my first post...sorry if it is a bit of an essay. I have been following the threads on here as well as Tiffany's videos and I wanted to interject on the food and eating issue. I do think people need to be open to the fact that Tiffany might have an eating disorder. For context, I am not a professional expert. I am however very familiar with the signs and symptoms and how they present themselves because of multiple experiences in my family. I apologise in advance if this post is triggering for some people.

• In early videos of Tiffany's she would post videos of herself eating food (Mukbangs, I think you called them!), often mentioning how long she had gone without eating (all day, 8 hours, etc). When this becomes a pattern, I do think one could assume she might be restricting her food intake, only to later "reward" herself with high calorie food seen in her Mukbangs. Most people find time in the day to eat something, and most jobs permit us to take lunch breaks etc. I have had days where I didn't eat because I've been busy or stressed but (even now) Tiffany always talks about how long it has been since she last ate and I do not think this is reflective of someone who is trying to maintain or increase weight gain.
• She generally posts a lot of videos about food: without actually eating much. In one of her earlier videos posted during lockdown (not linked), she boasted about how much she had been eating, then immediately stood up and turned to the side to check out her side profile (flattening her clothes against her stomach etc) which I thought was really off, and something she would have chosen to edit out, but also quite normal behaviour if you have had a difficult relationship with food for much of your life. I also find it hard to believe that someone who was eating non-stop would maintain such a low weight as the maths does just not check out. I appreciate her cancer may well have had a role here, but these people have often gone through much of their lives exaggerating about food and what they eat, but if you were to spend a day with them, you'd soon see they ate very little for meals, if at all.
• Tiffany has been told she needs to put on weight for her surgery. I think it is entirely possible (or probable) to assume that her cancer could be resulting in weight loss. But nevertheless she continues to talk about food all the time without really eating much. Notwithstanding the times when she is forced to fast because of scans, she constantly talks about how hungry she is, but she is almost always in a situation where there is no food e.g. in the car. She talks about what she will eat, but we don't really know if she does it when she gets home. If you had a lifeline thrown to you like this I really do think you would have a constant supply of high calorie food on you at all times.
• Even when presented with food, Tiffany uses extremely restrictive language around food. When offered food by her family, she often emphasises how she just wants a "tiny" piece, or how she "won't finish" something, or even how she "can't/won't/shouldn't" or is worried she will "overeat". The overeating comment was actually taken from one of her most recent videos, and she quickly corrected herself. But then why include it in the video?

I think it is very likely that eating might cause Tiffany pain and perhaps she is not transparent enough about those symptoms, so maybe this post of mine is unfair or presumptuous. Perhaps I am being really unfair. However, I do feel that her language around food, her size, and her behaviour are all very characteristic of someone with disordered eating, and this is something I have also seen in her earlier videos, from before she was diagnosed. She could well have been affected by cancer then too (albeit unknowingly) which could have affected her weight, but I don't think it would account for her overall relationship with food which I would argue has been unhealthy for years.

I think you've made a lot of valid posts. Those that say she eats a lot of junk- we only ever see her eat a bite or two of anything. When she shows a plated up meal it's always tiny and we don't even know if she eats it all.

It's far too late at this stage for her to do any appreciable 'fattening up'. If she's a naturally skinny person it may feel overwhelming for her to attempt to fatten up.

I was given those fortisip when I was having a reaction to chemo and radiotherapy and was having so much trouble Keeping food down- urgh, I hated them

The nibbling of the single chocolate and putting it back in the box for later was bizarre to say the least.

She's shown that before with some 'special' chocolates Matt bought her. All I could think of was the possibility of bacteria multiplying on them and spreading to others in the box, but clearly she survives these funny little quirks she has!

 

[LeonorG]

Also I neglected to mention a very major "prop" in these videos and that is Astin. She really puts him to work. It seems recently he too has grown weary of her sticking the camera in his face.

I'm surprised Elodie lets Tiffany (exploit) use her child for her videos. She also uses (exploits) baby Ella now. It's so odd. Tiffany is like those Hollywood producers exploiting cute kids in the film industry. She is so lazy with her content that she fills it with the children, the garden centre, Amma preparing juices, and mindless coffee shop visits.

 

[suzeq]

Has Tiff ever said in previous videos (since she was diagnosed) that she wants to help other people specifically in her situation/or with cancer in general?

Based on her experience being hospitalised with c.diff, Tiffany did say she wanted to become a volunteer at the hospital because she found the volunteers so kind and helpful. She wanted to do that too, she said.

 

[MissB123]

I continue to watch because I think this is more than a cancer story - it's also a study in mental health, social media, nutrition, and human behavior all playing out in real time.

 

[SueB]

I am not concerned about her choice of surgeon for this type of cancer. Reading a bit about him it is clear this is HIS field. I also think if for some reason he felt there was a better surgeon in UK for her I think he would have sought out a consult there. I have to think that just as in US these top experts know each other and do talk. I think her family did the research to find this doctor and also it was more than just finding an expert but one that would do the surgery. It is possible that St. Mark's declined her case. We just don't know.

She did say she only went to the original hospital that misdiagnosed then RM. Since the 80s I've never known St Marks turn down a patient. They even participated in my second cancer op that took place in a different health authority- the gynae surgeon was worried he could damage my J-pouch so St Marks joined all the MTD online and helped in my op. I pray her surgeon is all that and a cherry on top as it's too late now to go elsewhere. I'm also concerned about possible nursing strikes- RM nurses voted to strike.

 

[Turaj]

One concern I have is why her mother, Stella, looks so tired. She looked like she had not slept in days in the little clip that was shown. Maybe she stays up at night worrying. I sure hope her mother is getting routine health checkups.


They were toward the bottom of one of her trees. She reminds me of the attitude ( a little bit) of Jacqueline Kennedy, John F. Kennedy's wife, during the years she was living after his assassination. A narrator in a documentary of her life said that she liked to surround herself with beautiful things in her home to hide the sorrow in her life. I feel that Tiffany, in a way, is doing the same thing, be it consciously or subconsciously. Some people handle sorrow this way.

I am not sure why anyone questions how tired and sad Amma looks??? Of course she is not sleeping well at night....I sure would not if my daughter were facing this surgery. I am sure the rest of the family is looking after her the best they can.

 

[Lolaj]

Today's spoiler; Christmas tree again, watch coffee maker make coffee, other Christmas tree, twinkle-twinkle, s l o w ornament description, 200 cal drink, baby voice, Xmas pj's, broccoli and mushrooms easy peasy!!!, baby voice, twinkling, MATT IN MATCHING XMAS PJ'S.
I'm gonna

 

[pooch&mutt]

This was hands down one of the most sickeningly sweet video with nothing. I could not help but see that garland on the stair rail and wonder how she will get up there when home from surgery. Not one word on schedule but a bunch of crap. I had to give it a thumbs down. If she sticks that finger in her mouth another time I will go crazy. She is getting more and more difficult to watch. Gonna bring a candle to the hospital?????

the fingers in the mouth thing is a seriously bad habit of Ts..she constantly does it even when she’s in the hospital which is the best place to pick up a nasty Infection..and they won’t allow carcinogenic candles to be burnt..I understand she needs distractions to keep herself sane?..but at least get the food and exercise done properly and the benefits of both of them mentally and physically will help her more now and in recovery than decorations and gonks ffs..

 

[LeonorG]

I am not concerned about her choice of surgeon for this type of cancer. Reading a bit about him it is clear this is HIS field. I also think if for some reason he felt there was a better surgeon in UK for her I think he would have sought out a consult there. I have to think that just as in US these top experts know each other and do talk. I think her family did the research to find this doctor and also it was more than just finding an expert but one that would do the surgery. It is possible that St. Mark's declined her case. We just don't know.

Exactly. The god surgeon is a top expert in her cancer: https://www.royalmarsden.nhs.uk/our...rds/consultant-directory/mr-shahnawaz-rasheed

And he must be very experienced as no other surgeon would dare to operate on Tiffany.

An interview with her surgeon about PE: https://www.royalmarsden.nhs.uk/rm-magazine/study-pelvic-exenteration-advanced-colorectal-cancer

 

[ellyjelly2]

I think Tiffany likes being tiny, it fits with her whole little girl narrative. She appears to eat well ( before cancer) in the way she spoke about food, but as already said, if you spent time with her she eats very little. Zoella is a bit like this, eats a lot of junk food, should be bigger than she is, but if you could actually see what she is eating, there would be a lot left over. She also had her drink in the vlog but she didn’t then mention any breakfast.

 

[Turaj]

I think Tiffany likes being tiny, it fits with her whole little girl narrative. She appears to eat well ( before cancer) in the way she spoke about food, but as already said, if you spent time with her she eats very little. Zoella is a bit like this, eats a lot of junk food, should be bigger than she is, but if you could actually see what she is eating, there would be a lot left over. She also had her drink in the vlog but she didn’t then mention any breakfast.

anyone ever counted how many times she says "little" in a vlog. Everything is little whether a taste of food, a Christmas decoration ...little this and little that She is so irritating.

 

[Curly Top]

anyone ever counted how many times she says "little" in a vlog. Everything is little whether a taste of food, a Christmas decoration ...little this and little that She is so irritating.

Yes. And the way she pronounces that word - like "Lickle" -

 

[Blue skies]

Tragic looking thumbnail, click bait about bringing Christmas to hospital when the whole almost 25mins of video is about her gushing about Christmas like a 6year old who’s crazy about Harry Potter socks….LOL.

She’s so giddy and Matt has turned into a 10year old boy as well. Her dancing to “Will you help me cook, Amma” ?? really made me feel like giving her 2 tight slaps (no violence, just joking LOL…). The whole video is so sickening sweet, cheesy and it should simply be titled “Christmas decoration and cooking pasta”. So many ads that can’t be deleted and there’s nothing about ‘cancer’ in this video. Will all the money she craftily and shamelessly gets from YT bring her health back…??

 

[LeonorG]

I've always been quite critical of tiffanys thinking and not wanting to learn about her own body and her own disease. I put faith in the NHS surgeon. However, after watching the old video lastnight, I have changed my feelings about the surgeon a little bit.
He must have told Tiffany and Matt that he is only 1 of 15 that can do pelvic exenteration in the WORLD. That bit I don't believe, and I'm not sure why he would even be discussing that with patients. Blowing smoke up his own backside?
The video cuts but I did hear him saying that he felt bad, felt bad telling Tiffany because she is so young. Again, I know he deals with many young patients, there are a few in cancer support groups.

Several times Matt has mentioned the surgeon wanting to let Tiffany live her life. Then says she will only live a few months if she doesnt have surgery.
When Matt & Tiffany came away from the consultation, both seemed 'star struck' and I find that bit bizarre.

Omg I don't believe the surgeon ever said such! No way he is 1 of 15 in the whole WORLD who can do PE. This operation is rare but not that rare. I bet Matt and Tiffany misunderstood him (as is the tradition). What he probably meant is 1 of 15 in the world who could do a successful (removing all of the cancer to prolong her life) pelvic exenteration on Tiffany as Tiffany's tumour is extra HECTIC. Remember her tumour is extra nasty, 'substantial', 'large', and long, and it's invading her pelvic organs. Also, remember her margins were not good even after chemo and radiation so maybe extra skill is necessary to tackle this particular pelvic exenteration surgery.

 

[suzeq]

..and they won’t allow carcinogenic candles to be burnt..

Never mind carcinogens, a lit candle would absolutely be verboten in a hospital setting due to the presence of patients on highly flammable OXYGEN: ka-BOOM!!

 

[Lolaj]

Light candles in a hospital... it'd be kinda fun to watch her

 

[Lululime]

A psychiatrist once told me that the mind has over 100 defence mechanisms....which I found hard to believe. Bit more convinced now.

 

[Idrisrex]

Candles in a hospital, x mas socks while you have to be utterly clean because you have numerous sutures. If you sneeze too hard the is running over your Father Christmas socks, T.

 

[stardust22]

Maybe it was just bad editing but it was so strange that at the very end of the video she asked her viewers if she should buy Christmas socks or Christmas themed stuff to take it to hospital...as if that wasn't what the entire 27 minute video was about?! I don't know anyone who buys this stuff every year...her house must be full of it. It is very wasteful. Why would anyone need more than one pair of Christmas pyjamas (if at all)?

The Christmas stuff is definitely a coping mechanism. Nobody's entire personality is a religious holiday. She seems like she has an avoidant personality type so she just hides behind this stuff. If it wasn't Christmas, she'd be preparing for Easter...or getting the garden ready for summer. I suppose I can understand it to an extent because I can't imagine having such life-altering surgery, but it can't be a good coping strategy in the long run. I hope she has been offered counselling.