Tiffany Thinks #18

[Daisychain4]

I would certainly have less confusion in my life if I had been a fly on the wall during that conversation with the surgeon. I would dearly love to understand this, it may be up there with the world's greatest mysteries to me, such as Stonehenge. It is the reason so many of us became card carrying Tattle members.

But, is there any case to be made that, if not for the WW period and decision to postpone surgery, the cancer up her colon would not have been identified yet and her colon would have been left in, only to be discovered following major surgery that more cancer was in fact still remaining and spreading? Could the WW have turned out to be a benefit in that it helped identify the necessity for the removal of her colon as well during the major surgery? I ask only because I don't know the answer.

Good thoughts.
There was always colon cancer, though not as extensive so possibly less colon may have been removed earlier … though this probably isn’t the case as the cancer cells were probably well rooted before the WW. I think best case scenario is to get it all now from the colon despite her now having an ileostomy… maybe a greater chance for a better prognosis despite the downside of losing it all.

 

[LeonorG]

I remember that risk and reward speech very well...it was the day when I finally admitted on TT that I thought Matt was not helpful at all and that in fact I did not like him. Oh boy I got blasted. Now as I think about it I think we did not get the true conversation as it went down that day with her team and also the biopsy results etc. may have been reported to us in a certain way to make the W and W seem reasonable. It was giant roll of the dice...I have to assume that the lead surgeon deemed Tiffany not mentally ready to accept the risks and life changes that she would experience after the surgery. That is probably why he went with this decision. It would be malpractice to operate on something in the mental state she was in. Her denial factor was so high back then....it got a bit better and surgeon by surgeon they agreed to proceed.

It was so out of character for him to say that as he never showed much initiative and resolve (not on camera anyway) before. And it was strange in general considering how much they were 'pushing' for surgery and were told several times that without the surgery she will not make it and knowing (hopefully) that colorectal cancer (especially of her staging) cannot be cured without surgery. It was very strange to hear that from Matt. Maybe he was just supporting Tiffany, maybe she told him to back her up, we have no idea what took place before that. He even said that the best would be if she did not need the surgery at all. He really believed that that could be an option. I would expect such from Tiffany (she even hinted at being almost cancer free at the time) but I thought that Matt was sensible.

I would certainly have less confusion in my life if I had been a fly on the wall during that conversation with the surgeon. I would dearly love to understand this, it may be up there with the world's greatest mysteries to me, such as Stonehenge. It is the reason so many of us became card carrying Tattle members.

But, is there any case to be made that, if not for the WW period and decision to postpone surgery, the cancer up her colon would not have been identified yet and her colon would have been left in, only to be discovered following major surgery that more cancer was in fact still remaining and spreading? Could the WW have turned out to be a benefit in that it helped identify the necessity for the removal of her colon as well during the major surgery? I ask only because I don't know the answer.

"I would certainly have less confusion in my life if I had been a fly on the wall during that conversation with the surgeon. I would dearly love to understand this, it may be up there with the world's greatest mysteries to me, such as Stonehenge. It is the reason so many of us became card carrying Tattle members." - That's why I joined tattle. To understand this mystery. Some good person mentioned tattle in the comments and I ran here to investigate.
"But, is there any case to be made that, if not for the WW period and decision to postpone surgery, the cancer up her colon would not have been identified yet and her colon would have been left in, only to be discovered following major surgery that more cancer was in fact still remaining and spreading? Could the WW have turned out to be a benefit in that it helped identify the necessity for the removal of her colon as well during the major surgery? I ask only because I don't know the answer." - A good point. Perhaps the cancer in the colon would have been visible even back in September when she was meant to have the surgery. They could have seen it once they opened her up. Perhaps it would just have been smaller and less spread. Or perhaps if the tumour and all the organs were removed back in September, it would not have spread to the colon? Just thinking that if it spread to the colon and it only got discovered recently and now T says that the colon was full of cancer cells (so it grew fast and aggressively?) who knows where else the cancer has spread without anyone knowing? Supposedly the cancer in the colon was so tiny back then that it did not show on scans.

Just read Daisy's post and that's true, there was alsways cancer in the colon but maybe not this much. We know that her cancer is low rectal and it started in the rectal and anal area but she also said at the beginning of her journey that they found cancer in the 'colon and rectum'.

 

[penny1992]

Just saw Tiffany posted a video... I CBA watching so I have a lot of catching up on here to do!

 

[Saydee]

I would certainly have less confusion in my life if I had been a fly on the wall during that conversation with the surgeon. I would dearly love to understand this, it may be up there with the world's greatest mysteries to me, such as Stonehenge. It is the reason so many of us became card carrying Tattle members.

But, is there any case to be made that, if not for the WW period and decision to postpone surgery, the cancer up her colon would not have been identified yet and her colon would have been left in, only to be discovered following major surgery that more cancer was in fact still remaining and spreading? Could the WW have turned out to be a benefit in that it helped identify the necessity for the removal of her colon as well during the major surgery? I ask only because I don't know the answer.

Oops, didn't see the above post by @Saydee before posting, making a similar point!

Yes that's pretty much what I was meaning.

When disease spreads from the primary tumour it spreads in microscopic form and then settles in another area to become metastatic disease. If T had that agreed to the surgery back in September, it would have taken a few weeks to put into place. The delay is around 8 weeks I think? The wait between biopsies. In the grander scheme of things, its not a huge delay. T could have had surgery, recovered and further spread show further up. That is what her surgeon was explaining to both Matt & T, if spread was to show in her lungs or liver on watch and wait, it would have already been there (in microscopic form). T was very puzzled about that and was asking what does he mean @it would have already have been there if it isn't there now?
Her surgeon was referring to microscopic spread that can only be seen after its grown larger.
The wait and her surgeon locating it higher up could be beneficial for T. It's now been found and hopefully all removed.

 

[Sheba]

Did she actually say anything on this video? She mentioned a bladder situation, which I assume means catheter...

But after she said she'd be wasting weeks worth of folks time posting old videos of hospital, and started apologizing for the 3rd time for being out of touch I just had to give up.

 

[Saydee]

who knows where else the cancer has spread without anyone knowing?

Which is why patients in T's situation have scans every 12 weeks, and its why surgeons/oncologists are hesitant to discuss remission being free of cancer.
A scan may suggest 'No Evidence of disease' but that only means ' No Evidence of VISIBLE disease'

@Sheba
She said she didn't want to cry so did not mention her bladder too much.
here is the transcript from the video
Download0:00
hi my loving Tiffany thanks family how
0:03
are you all I'm so so sorry for not
0:06
posting a video in a really really long
0:09
time
0:10
um this is the first time that I'm
0:12
actually starting this video
0:15
um without crying I've tried to film
0:16
this a couple of times and
0:18
I think I just wasn't ready I I just
0:21
didn't feel ready today I woke up and I
0:24
just feel like I can't keep blocking
0:27
everyone out so I haven't talked to
0:30
anyone I haven't talked to any of my
0:31
friends I haven't talked to any of my
0:32
family I haven't talked to any of the
0:33
Tiffany thinks family I've just kind of
0:36
been
0:37
I've kind of been very low and you guys
0:40
know what I'm like normally I'm very
0:42
good at blocking things out and um
0:46
as soon as I got home
0:49
so I was in the hospital for a very long
0:51
time less than three weeks which I'm
0:54
happy about because initially they were
0:56
saying I'll be in hospital three to four
0:58
weeks so the fact that I got home in
1:00
less than three weeks was amazing but
1:03
then as soon as I got home
1:05
I just went downhill mentally I just it
1:09
hit me that I wasn't able to do
1:12
much I'm still kind of sitting on my
1:15
side so what the plan was for me to what
1:19
I did was I filmed little Clips in the
1:21
hospital and I thought I could make one
1:23
big video so like a an hour long or two
1:26
hour long video of my experience
1:29
but I just can't sit up so right now how
1:32
I'm sitting is I'm sitting on a big
1:34
pillow on my side and I can do that for
1:38
20 minutes and then I have to kind of
1:40
lie down back on my side so it's quite
1:43
difficult for me to edit a video so what
1:46
I thought I could do is if this is okay
1:48
with you I thought I could um you know
1:51
the clips that I filmed in the hospital
1:53
I thought I could just post those so
1:57
um it won't be an hour long it just
1:59
might be like 10 minutes or 15 minutes
2:01
or 20 minute videos
2:04
um so that you guys would see what it
2:06
was like in hospital I've always said
2:09
this channel isn't an educational
2:11
channel channel it's just more my
2:14
experience and everyone's cancer journey
2:17
is different I always say this
2:19
everyone's cancer journey is different
2:20
even the doctors say this they always
2:23
say we can say it might be four weeks it
2:25
might be three weeks it might be three
2:27
to four weeks it might be longer
2:30
um so everyone is different and I came
2:32
home earlier than I expected and I'm so
2:36
grateful that I I can cover at home I've
2:39
had nurses come home and I've had
2:41
appointments and so I've been filming
2:44
little clips and what I thought I should
2:46
do is just kind of post them so I will
2:49
try and post them Tuesday Thursday and
2:51
Sundays I'm not going to be strict with
2:54
the schedule you guys know like some
2:56
days I just don't want to get out of bed
2:58
I'm just crying all the time and there's
3:01
days where I feel like today and I feel
3:03
like yep I can sit down for 20 30
3:05
minutes and try and edit a video so
3:07
everything I put out will be all kind of
3:10
from when I was in the hospital so
3:13
everything's pre-recorded and initially
3:15
I did want to put out a whole big long
3:17
video it's just I'm unable to sit up for
3:20
too long so it's just going to be little
3:22
short videos I hope that's okay
3:25
um
3:26
I just feel like it is unfair for me not
3:30
to show you kind of my experience in the
3:32
hospital because I took you through
3:35
everything with chemotherapy with
3:38
radiotherapy with my C diff and I just
3:41
feel like with the surgery
3:43
I wasn't physically able to kind of edit
3:46
I was able to pick up my camera which I
3:49
wasn't sure I would be able to do
3:51
because I thought
3:53
I I don't like I just thought I wouldn't
3:55
think about it but even when I was
3:57
highly medicated and even when
4:01
like I don't think I filmed every single
4:03
day I don't know I haven't looked at the
4:05
clips and I know most of the time I was
4:07
in the hospital I was very highly
4:09
medicated but I just remember picking up
4:12
the camera here and there and
4:15
um so I'll kind of I'll figure it out
4:17
but I just wanted to come on here and
4:18
say I am okay I am recovering
4:22
um in regards to my surgery
4:25
I haven't really told you what I had
4:28
done I'm gonna give you kind of a quick
4:30
summary of my surgery and then maybe
4:32
after you guys watch all the clips if
4:36
you have any questions maybe I can do a
4:38
q a right at the end when I'm able to
4:41
sit up for longer
4:44
um I had a pelvic accenteration and I
4:47
didn't get a colostomy I got an
4:49
ileostomy only because when they looked
4:52
at my scan so my plan so I was mentally
4:55
preparing for a colostomy bag so um
4:59
but when they looked at the scans and
5:02
when they kind of opened me up they
5:04
realized my whole large colon was just
5:07
kind of full of cancer cells and
5:10
um the scans kind of showed that as well
5:12
so they had to remove the whole colon
5:16
um and just leave the small colon in and
5:18
so I've got an ileostomy they managed to
5:21
save my bladder which is amazing because
5:23
I only have one bag but the bladder is
5:27
still not okay like it's you I don't
5:30
want to talk about it without crying
5:33
so the bladder
5:35
um even though I don't have a bag I'm
5:36
still kind of trying to cope with my
5:39
bladder situation
5:41
um
5:42
but yeah it's all kind of a lot to talk
5:44
about right now because it just feels
5:46
fairly new it all it's real now like you
5:49
know I think before when I was talking
5:51
about it
5:52
it didn't feel real I knew it was going
5:54
to happen but it didn't feel real
5:55
whereas now it's all happened it's kind
5:58
of like not a shock it just feels like I
6:00
need to settle into this new body into
6:03
this new life into this
6:06
new way of living and
6:09
it has been difficult like it's been
6:12
um it's been very difficult
6:15
I would say you know I had chemotherapy
6:17
radiotherapy and I've had
6:19
surgery I would say each
6:22
has like each has been very very
6:24
difficult
6:25
but the plan was always to have surgery
6:28
to have this removed so
6:30
um
6:32
yeah I feel like I'm not really ready to
6:35
talk about it a lot because I'm still
6:38
trying to process everything and I feel
6:40
like in a couple of weeks I might be
6:43
better and I might feel like I'm ready
6:45
to talk
6:47
um
6:48
but right now I feel like if you want to
6:50
do any research you can Google you can
6:52
find out what my surgery involves and
6:57
but for now I just feel like I really
6:59
really miss you guys I really miss my
7:01
family I miss my friends I miss
7:04
I just miss doing the things that I love
7:07
and
7:08
um just simple things like making a cup
7:10
of tea
7:13
has been difficult so
7:15
um
7:17
I am so so so sorry for
7:20
not talking to you and for
7:25
doing a cry
7:26
like you guys have helped me through
7:29
every aspect this past kind of year if
7:32
you've helped me so so so much since I
7:35
posted my cancer video even way before I
7:37
had cancer so many of you have kind of
7:40
helped me
7:41
um through life and I truly truly
7:44
appreciate you all I'm just so sorry
7:46
because I feel like
7:49
I didn't want to talk to anyone I got to
7:52
a point where
7:54
if my friends would call me I wouldn't
7:55
pick up I would kind of not go on
7:57
Instagram I would not go on YouTube I
8:00
would kind of just I just wanted to be
8:02
on my own and
8:04
um
8:06
yeah it's it's I don't know I'm
8:10
normally when things happen I kind of
8:13
block things out and I'll do something
8:14
I'll leave the house I go and see
8:16
someone but this time it just felt
8:18
different it felt obviously I can't do
8:20
the things
8:21
I want to do right now and I know all of
8:24
this is going to get easier
8:26
um
8:26
I just wanted to apologize for leaving
8:29
you
8:31
um I kind of I did an update not really
8:33
an update but I wanted to let you know
8:35
that I'm at home so I posted it on
8:37
Instagram and Facebook and
8:40
um
8:42
I just yeah I feel like
8:47
I feel like I still need some time and
8:49
that's why I thought I'll just rather
8:52
than kind of shutting off completely
8:55
even if I lie on my side and edit like I
8:58
can lie on my outside and edit and I can
9:01
sit up for a little while so even if I
9:04
get some videos out for you you'll
9:06
understand what I've kind of gone
9:07
through
9:09
um
9:10
because it's hard to explain it's really
9:12
hard to explain that I went into ICU and
9:16
I was expected to kind of stay in the
9:18
intensive care for like two days and
9:20
then I ended up staying around four days
9:23
um
9:24
just because they needed to get the
9:26
pain right I was in pain I I
9:29
tried to stand up quite quickly and
9:31
there was a lot going on
9:33
um I went to one Ward and then I got
9:35
moved to another Ward and so I did
9:39
manage to get those clips and I I think
9:41
right now
9:42
if I upload those videos you will still
9:45
be part of my journey
9:47
um but it's all kind of pre-recorded so
9:51
I just want you to know that I'm
9:52
recovering at home I am okay
9:55
um I love you all so much honestly thank
9:57
you for your prayers thank you for your
9:59
love
9:59
I don't think
10:01
like I don't think I could have done any
10:03
of this without your support and
10:06
rather than shutting off I think the
10:09
next step for me
10:10
is to edit the videos
10:12
to get them out for you and just to
10:15
slowly kind of get back into a routine
10:20
um and I'm not going to push myself so
10:22
let's say on Tuesday if you don't get a
10:24
video out it's probably because I wasn't
10:26
well enough to edit and so the next
10:28
video will be Thursday and if that video
10:30
is not out it'll be on a Sunday okay but
10:32
you know what I'm like I really I really
10:35
like having a routine I really like
10:36
having a structure so and I just really
10:39
miss you I can't explain like just
10:41
talking to you and also everyone that
10:45
sent me a card in the PO box thank you
10:47
thank you thank you and I'mma Matt and I
10:50
uh we'd sit in the evenings and we read
10:52
the cards and honestly I truly truly
10:54
appreciate all of you I'm I'm so so so
10:57
lucky I know I'm the luckiest girl I'm
11:00
so blessed and
11:02
um just want to say thank you
11:04
hold on
11:06
yeah bum
11:10
I just had to reposition my bottom
11:12
because it's on like the side I know I
11:15
should have done this update sooner it's
11:16
just any time I turn the camera on I
11:19
would just cry and I just wasn't ready
11:21
you know I just wasn't ready and
11:24
I am
11:27
this surgery is
11:30
crazy it's the craziest
11:32
I've ever heard I didn't even know
11:34
things like this was ever possible
11:37
like to remove this remove that take
11:40
this from that area and put it in this
11:41
area it's just
11:43
it doesn't feel real like I can't
11:46
believe
11:47
doctors and I I was so lucky and so so
11:50
blessed to have the best surgeons on
11:52
board
11:54
um
11:55
and we'll just wait for results now I
11:58
guess um
11:59
that's all we can do
12:01
but I know you know my main surgeon he
12:04
said he was always going to treat me
12:06
like family and I genuinely feel like he
12:09
he has been treating me like family and
12:12
I'm so so so so lucky to have the best
12:16
care and who knows what's gonna happen
12:19
but all I do know is that everyone tried
12:21
their hardest the doctors and nurses I
12:24
all of us have tried our hardest so
12:29
we'll just leave it to God now and
12:33
let's let's see let's see what happens
12:35
next but
12:36
for now the next few videos I don't know
12:39
how many videos I feel like I can't
12:41
remember
12:43
how much I filmed Everything feels like
12:45
a bit of a blur but
12:48
what I will do is maybe in the bottom in
12:50
the description box I'll I'll put like
12:52
in Little Stars or I'll write down
12:54
pre-recorded
12:57
um so you know that it's all been
12:59
pre-recorded
13:04
okay what I'm gonna do now I feel really
13:06
good already just kind of talking to you
13:08
I already feel instantly better I'm
13:10
gonna reply back to all my friends and
13:12
my family now
13:14
um
13:15
yeah because I feel like today is the
13:16
day that I just want to tell I just want
13:19
to say sorry like I'm so sorry that I
13:22
feel like I've been selfish and I
13:24
haven't talked to anyone I just kind of
13:27
being in my own thoughts in my own world
13:30
and trying to adapt this new life and
13:32
new body a new
13:34
everything that's new for me so it's
13:36
just like I feel like I've put myself
13:38
first and sometimes I think you know
13:40
what that's the best thing to do to put
13:42
yourself first because when I feel good
13:44
I can give you all the best version of
13:47
myself
13:48
um
13:50
but I feel really really bad that
13:52
I've left it too long so I just feel
13:54
like I need to reply back to all my
13:56
friends my family and
13:59
to you all as well I
14:03
I think if you knew the extent of the
14:06
surgery and I know I haven't explained
14:08
it so if you want you can like do your
14:09
own research if you knew the extent
14:11
you'd understand why
14:14
it's
14:15
why I needed this time to learn to adapt
14:19
to understand and it's not easy you know
14:22
you're learning to adapt with this
14:24
physical change but then mentally you've
14:26
got a understand what's going on and
14:30
yeah it's not it's not easy I never I
14:34
never ever said it was easy cancer it's
14:37
not easy and I always feel like if you
14:39
know anyone with any health condition
14:42
not just cancer just any health
14:44
condition reach out to them and even if
14:46
they don't reply
14:49
um they will they will reply in their
14:50
own time but it's so nice to know that
14:53
all my friends family and you all
14:55
are kind of here waiting for me to come
14:58
back and
15:00
that in itself is just like getting me
15:03
out of bed and thinking yes Tiffany you
15:05
need to do this and you've got so many
15:07
people that
15:08
love you and
15:12
and I just feel like you know
15:15
everything that we're all dealing with
15:17
in life is horrible like we all have
15:19
these battles we have to fight
15:22
um because that's just life we all have
15:25
these battles that are thrown at us and
15:27
we have to deal with so let's all be
15:30
kind to each other because
15:33
we're all dealing with things so like we
15:35
have to be nice to each other I think
15:37
that's the most important in life just
15:39
be kind and just because you don't know
15:42
what anyone's going through like someone
15:44
that doesn't know me could look at me
15:46
and think oh she's fine but you know you
15:49
just don't know everyone is dealing with
15:51
some sort of battle in life and we all
15:54
have to
15:55
remember that
15:57
just remember that because
16:01
life is tough life is tough
16:04
I love you all a lot a lot a lot thank
16:07
you thank you so much for
16:09
everything honestly I can't thank you
16:12
enough hopefully there will be a video
16:14
for you on Tuesday Thursday and Sunday
16:17
at 6 00 p.m like I used to do
16:21
um
16:22
but if there's a day missing please
16:23
don't worry I love you a lot a lot a lot
16:26
thank you for watching and thank you for
16:28
being part of my Tiffany thinks family I
16:31
feel like we're growing and growing
16:32
every single day and
16:34
um
16:35
thank you thank you goodbye
16:42
[Music]

 

[BCrowl]

Did she actually say anything on this video? She mentioned a bladder situation, which I assume means catheter...

But after she said she'd be wasting weeks worth of folks time posting old videos of hospital, and started apologizing for the 3rd time for being out of touch I just had to give up.

She finally said that she had pelvic exenteration. Also, she has an ileostomy instead of a colostomy because they had to remove the entire colon due to cancer. She said that we can Google all of this. She didn’t go into detail about what any of it means.

 

[Sheba]

She’s back at defending herself. ‘This isn’t an educational channel’ lol

I actually felt good when she said that. A fresh honesty.

 

[LeonorG]

I find this explanation of a colostomy and an ileostomy helpful.

 

[Sheba]

Life sucks sometimes. Why do people have to suffer like this? It seems so unfair. Tiff should be in the prime of her life and planning a wedding and kids, not fighting this awful disease and undergoing such pain and sadness. All the best wishes in the world for Tiffany and for everyone. Let all beings be free from suffering.

agree with you, here. Not going to watch any of her old hospital clips, tho.

 

[smashgirl1999]

In the first couple minutes of her video when she stated "I haven't talked to any of my family, I haven't talked to any of my friends" I immediately got angry! What a selfish mentally deranged person she is! Is she lying or has she seriously not talked to her sister or anyone else in her family since the day she had her surgery? Yes, the surgery and having cancer is horrible, but to shut out your own family and close friends is deplorable. She supposedly claims that she doesn't want Amma, Matt or her family to be sad or suffer because of her illness but what on earth does she think she is doing by acting this way.

Four years ago my colon twisted and I ended up spending the next 2 years having 15 surgeries and spent over 468 days in the hospital. I was on TPN and wasn't allowed to eat for almost a year and a half. I wasn't expected to live and had to be revived numerous times during my surgeries and days in the hospital. I can't imagine shutting everyone out of my life when they were worried sick about me during this time. My husband was incredible and my best friend but unexpectedly died on the day before COVID lockdowns started. He was only 52 years old. I was in the hospital when he passed and was forced to go through my illness and mourning his death alone for months on end in the hospital. My choices were to either fight and try to get better for my son and family that loved me or give up. I chose to fight. Were there times that I did not want to answer all the texts and phone calls from my family and friends - yes of course, but my conscience wouldn't allow me to ignore them, leaving them out of my journey to fight to get better.

I am not sharing my story for sympathy - I just want to share that I know what it's like to go through a medical ordeal that was life and death. I can't even fathom that her priority was to continue picking up the camera and film instead of staying in contact with her relatives and friends, who I am sure reached out to her. Call me a horrible person but I really wanted to reach through the screen and slap her when she stated this. She needs to stop making these youtube videos and get her selfish mental state in order.

BTW, my health has improved remarkably. Yes, I have long term health effects but I strive to live everyday to the fullest. I was forced to file bankruptcy and basically lost all of my material assets because of the medical bills that my insurance did not cover. I had a fantastic life before my illness and will always cherish that I was so lucky to have had a fantastic husband for 26 years and we were blessed to have had so many nice things during that time. My life is different now but I am starting over and that's okay. I have a roof over my head and a car to drive and the material things don't matter anymore. Thanks for listening to my rant!

 

[Sheba]

Of course, I understand your point of view. But if this is the case please change the title of the video, because it wasn't about "my cancer surgery", it was about "my youtube posting schedule". She's always alluding in her titles and even in the video itself that she will spill the tea, but she never does.

so well said. You all never disappoint.

Thank you to everyone who posted synopsis & cliff notes!!! Love you Tattlers.

 

[BCrowl]

In the first couple minutes of her video when she stated "I haven't talked to any of my family, I haven't talked to any of my friends" I immediately got angry! What a selfish mentally deranged person she is! Is she lying or has she seriously not talked to her sister or anyone else in her family since the day she had her surgery? Yes, the surgery and having cancer is horrible, but to shut out your own family and close friends is deplorable. She supposedly claims that she doesn't want Amma, Matt or her family to be sad or suffer because of her illness but what on earth does she think she is doing by acting this way.

Four years ago my colon twisted and I ended up spending the next 2 years having 15 surgeries and spent over 468 days in the hospital. I was on TPN and wasn't allowed to eat for almost a year and a half. I wasn't expected to live and had to be revived numerous times during my surgeries and days in the hospital. I can't imagine shutting everyone out of my life when they were worried sick about me during this time. My husband was incredible and my best friend but unexpectedly died on the day before COVID lockdowns started. He was only 52 years old. I was in the hospital when he passed and was forced to go through my illness and mourning his death alone for months on end in the hospital. My choices were to either fight and try to get better for my son and family that loved me or give up. I chose to fight. Were there times that I did not want to answer all the texts and phone calls from my family and friends - yes of course, but my conscience wouldn't allow me to ignore them, leaving them out of my journey to fight to get better.

I am not sharing my story for sympathy - I just want to share that I know what it's like to go through a medical ordeal that was life and death. I can't even fathom that her priority was to continue picking up the camera and film instead of staying in contact with her relatives and friends, who I am sure reached out to her. Call me a horrible person but I really wanted to reach through the screen and slap her when she stated this. She needs to stop making these youtube videos and get her selfish mental state in order.

BTW, my health has improved remarkably. Yes, I have long term health effects but I strive to live everyday to the fullest. I was forced to file bankruptcy and basically lost all of my material assets because of the medical bills that my insurance did not cover. I had a fantastic life before my illness and will always cherish that I was so lucky to have had a fantastic husband for 26 years and we were blessed to have had so many nice things during that time. My life is different now but I am starting over and that's okay. I have a roof over my head and a car to drive and the material things don't matter anymore. Thanks for listening to my rant!

I’m so sorry about the loss of your beloved husband, and about all that you have been through. I’m so glad that your health has improved. I wish you all the best

 

[Daisychain4]

She finally said that she had pelvic exenteration. Also, she has an ileostomy instead of a colostomy because they had to remove the entire colon due to cancer. She said that we can Google all of this. She didn’t go into detail about what any of it means.

True to form … Our Girl … she’s that gift that keeps on giving !

In the first couple minutes of her video when she stated "I haven't talked to any of my family, I haven't talked to any of my friends" I immediately got angry! What a selfish mentally deranged person she is! Is she lying or has she seriously not talked to her sister or anyone else in her family since the day she had her surgery? Yes, the surgery and having cancer is horrible, but to shut out your own family and close friends is deplorable. She supposedly claims that she doesn't want Amma, Matt or her family to be sad or suffer because of her illness but what on earth does she think she is doing by acting this way.

Four years ago my colon twisted and I ended up spending the next 2 years having 15 surgeries and spent over 468 days in the hospital. I was on TPN and wasn't allowed to eat for almost a year and a half. I wasn't expected to live and had to be revived numerous times during my surgeries and days in the hospital. I can't imagine shutting everyone out of my life when they were worried sick about me during this time. My husband was incredible and my best friend but unexpectedly died on the day before COVID lockdowns started. He was only 52 years old. I was in the hospital when he passed and was forced to go through my illness and mourning his death alone for months on end in the hospital. My choices were to either fight and try to get better for my son and family that loved me or give up. I chose to fight. Were there times that I did not want to answer all the texts and phone calls from my family and friends - yes of course, but my conscience wouldn't allow me to ignore them, leaving them out of my journey to fight to get better.

I am not sharing my story for sympathy - I just want to share that I know what it's like to go through a medical ordeal that was life and death. I can't even fathom that her priority was to continue picking up the camera and film instead of staying in contact with her relatives and friends, who I am sure reached out to her. Call me a horrible person but I really wanted to reach through the screen and slap her when she stated this. She needs to stop making these youtube videos and get her selfish mental state in order.

BTW, my health has improved remarkably. Yes, I have long term health effects but I strive to live everyday to the fullest. I was forced to file bankruptcy and basically lost all of my material assets because of the medical bills that my insurance did not cover. I had a fantastic life before my illness and will always cherish that I was so lucky to have had a fantastic husband for 26 years and we were blessed to have had so many nice things during that time. My life is different now but I am starting over and that's okay. I have a roof over my head and a car to drive and the material things don't matter anymore. Thanks for listening to my rant!

Thanks for sharing, that was sad to read but you should be so proud you chose to fight … and fight you did. I sure hope life treats you gently from here and you can smile again with a warm heart.

 

[Avasarala]

Saw a new video and hopped back on here ,missed you guys !

 

[LeonorG]

"no souls" and "blow arse". Sounds like an astute and intelligent person, this chinchilla.

 

[Miriam3]

At least she seems to be not as hopped up on morphine as she used to be.

 

[Daisychain4]

Saw a new video and hopped back on here ,missed you guys !

Hey, hello!
welcome back

 

[puddleduck]

In the first couple minutes of her video when she stated "I haven't talked to any of my family, I haven't talked to any of my friends" I immediately got angry! What a selfish mentally deranged person she is! Is she lying or has she seriously not talked to her sister or anyone else in her family since the day she had her surgery? Yes, the surgery and having cancer is horrible, but to shut out your own family and close friends is deplorable. She supposedly claims that she doesn't want Amma, Matt or her family to be sad or suffer because of her illness but what on earth does she think she is doing by acting this way.

Four years ago my colon twisted and I ended up spending the next 2 years having 15 surgeries and spent over 468 days in the hospital. I was on TPN and wasn't allowed to eat for almost a year and a half. I wasn't expected to live and had to be revived numerous times during my surgeries and days in the hospital. I can't imagine shutting everyone out of my life when they were worried sick about me during this time. My husband was incredible and my best friend but unexpectedly died on the day before COVID lockdowns started. He was only 52 years old. I was in the hospital when he passed and was forced to go through my illness and mourning his death alone for months on end in the hospital. My choices were to either fight and try to get better for my son and family that loved me or give up. I chose to fight. Were there times that I did not want to answer all the texts and phone calls from my family and friends - yes of course, but my conscience wouldn't allow me to ignore them, leaving them out of my journey to fight to get better.

I am not sharing my story for sympathy - I just want to share that I know what it's like to go through a medical ordeal that was life and death. I can't even fathom that her priority was to continue picking up the camera and film instead of staying in contact with her relatives and friends, who I am sure reached out to her. Call me a horrible person but I really wanted to reach through the screen and slap her when she stated this. She needs to stop making these youtube videos and get her selfish mental state in order.

BTW, my health has improved remarkably. Yes, I have long term health effects but I strive to live everyday to the fullest. I was forced to file bankruptcy and basically lost all of my material assets because of the medical bills that my insurance did not cover. I had a fantastic life before my illness and will always cherish that I was so lucky to have had a fantastic husband for 26 years and we were blessed to have had so many nice things during that time. My life is different now but I am starting over and that's okay. I have a roof over my head and a car to drive and the material things don't matter anymore. Thanks for listening to my rant!

I want to hug you and I do applaud you for choosing to fight.
Wishing you many happy days and positive experiences. Bless you xx

 

[Daisychain4]

"no souls" and "blow arse". Sounds like an astute and intelligent person, this chinchilla.

Hahahaha … seems like chubby chinchilla needs to consider a diet! Mouth wayyy too big
I have an inkling who that is … not rocket science to look at todays posts and see the mouth droolers dripping with glee because our girl posted her usual
Fluff. The blue heart brigade are on the move!