Staying in bed all day with your curtains drawn is something that someone struggling with their mental health would do though, no?
TheLongMum #3 Life couldn't be harder, I ponder from Lake Garda...
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I'm no expert but perhaps getting out of the house (or even tidying it seeing as she described it as a shithole yesterday) might have made her feel a bit better. Even reading a book. But scrolling endlessly through tiktok all day in the dark won't help will it.
That’s a logical way to deal with it. I can only speak for myself, but when I’ve been in the pits of despair, what you should be doing to rectify it kinda takes a back seat. If that makes sense?
Seemed like a bit of a mixed bag because after saying on insta she had spent four hours in bed (scrolling) she then went for a walk, came home and made a cocktail, knocked up some hummus, then made herself a nice looking meal and complained that she had no one to cook for her. To me personally I feel it looks more like procrastination then depths of despair
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Oh I dunno. I probably don’t belong in this thread. I can just identify with some of her stuff (being left with a small baby, the Dad getting into a relationship and the new GF becoming a mother figure quickly - the trauma/mental health struggles that ensues because of all of that, money struggles, the dynamic she has with her Mum, not expecting to be living the life you’re living and how overwhelming it can all be when you’re on your own).
I’ll see myself out…
I’ll see myself out…
yes when you put it like that,I can imagine her mental health is poor. Do you think the new gf is a mother figure for the girls?Oh I dunno. I probably don’t belong in this thread. I can just identify with some of her stuff (being left with a small baby, the Dad getting into a relationship and the new GF becoming a mother figure quickly - the trauma/mental health struggles that ensues because of all of that, money struggles, the dynamic she has with her Mum, not expecting to be living the life you’re living and how overwhelming it can all be when you’re on your own).
I’ll see myself out…
I only recently started following her after reading all her threads here, but there was a post she did about the kids being out with their Dad and his gf, and people presuming that she was their Mum and the worry that she has that her home isn’t enough because it’s just her there. I really identified with that and it does duck your brain up tbh. My girl’s nearly 5 and it’s something that still breaks my heart.
So I’m guessing the gf is in their lives regularly? Just that alone has got to impact, surely?
ah yeah that is sad..I can't imagine my 5 yr old with another woman
hope you're okWe know her mental health is poor. She reminds me of my ex husband. Five years after I left, he's still wallowing about, drinking heavily, has lost two jobs, is refusing point blank to get help for his multitude of issues (that I tried for 15 years to help him with and eventually gave up) and still occasionally sends me a drunk message telling me he still loves me. He hasn't moved on with his life ONE INCH. As for still loving me, he doesn't even know me any more. He needs to put his big boy pants on, accept that I left, address the reasons why our marriage failed and move on. Same with Anna. tit happens. Yes she got left with a new baby but duck me, it's been what, three and a half years now? Her ex has moved on. People move on. You can choose to lie in the dark with the curtains closed for the rest of your life or you can take a deep breath and get living again. She's seeing a therapist, but it seems to be doing zero good. We're all allowed a wobble but she's still in the same hole she was in two years ago.
Your points are very valid. This isn’t a rave thread but I don’t think anyone here reallllllly dislikes Anna. She just makes some interesting/odd/ life decisions. If you’ve not followed her that long you’ll have missed a lot!Oh I dunno. I probably don’t belong in this thread. I can just identify with some of her stuff (being left with a small baby, the Dad getting into a relationship and the new GF becoming a mother figure quickly - the trauma/mental health struggles that ensues because of all of that, money struggles, the dynamic she has with her Mum, not expecting to be living the life you’re living and how overwhelming it can all be when you’re on your own).
I’ll see myself out…
I think there are some really nasty comments on this thread. She clearly isn’t winning any parenting awards at the moment and her decision to blow every penny on a holiday for herself was a terrible one. But its also pretty obvious that she isn’t well. When someone who has spoken openly about her mental illness can’t get out of bed, it’s really one dimensional just to say it’s because she is lazy.
If someone experiences physical ill health we don't expect them to just get better and get on with it. A friend of mine has had MS for more than half her life, I don't expect her to have got over it by now, she never will. Mental illness is the same, depression is slightly different as you can, and many people do, recover but most mental illnesses are there for life. Like any long term illness you can have periods of remission or periods where medication works better than others but it's still there. My niece will never recover from her mental illness, she's 35, she got ill when she was 21, she'll be medicated until she dies. Anna not being capable to do many things we can do is a symptom of her illness. I really wish there was more understanding of mental illness because it seems many people see it as a personal failing. People with mental illnesses often look like there are inconsistencies because they are able to do some things and not others, things like cooking for yourself might be something you have capacity for one day but the next day you might only be capable of warming a tin of soup or you may be able to go out for a walk but not face upto sorting your bills out. Excessive spending is also something lots of people with mental illnesses do, chasing a dopamine hit and not thinking about the consequences until it's too late
I've always liked Anna but her accepting donations via PayPal was crossing a line for me. I bet loads of those giving her money are vulnerable themselves. I think that was really low.
I did genuinely used to like her and felt to an extent I could relate to her. But she’s gone down such a warped and twisted path it’s uncomfortable now. I think it all started when she began obsessing over men and sex toys, the constant dildo shots and “mY bOyFrIeNd” posts became unhealthy
The sex element is really weird. I remember her getting all misty eyed about her dead dad's jazz mags. Very odd. I think she has a really warped relationship with sex.
She definitely bases her worth on the attention of men.
Really genuinely heartened by the NUANCE of mental illness being discussed here. YES this is a gossip site but the fact that so often what is picked apart is clear symptoms of having mental health issues has made me uncomfortable and actually want to stick up for Anna.
I also think there is a fine line - I don't want perfection projected at me by 'influencers' because IRL I am yet to meet a perfect person. Often someone being vulnerable exposes the ugly bits we all have in ourselves. This is why we connect with people but it can also cause us to project. Whatever we feel we are doing / working hard on / struggling with that she isn't - triggers something. The parts of ourselves that we might not be proud of being shown so openly - triggers something. I think in some ways most people here fit in to these two camps ( then we have the wild card, third camp, exclusive to friends and relations of her ex
).
Anna is unusually honest and self deprecating - this means she puts her worst foot forward. Likely because of lack of boundaries because she does have a difficult childhood and history.
Anyway, my two pennies worth.
I also think there is a fine line - I don't want perfection projected at me by 'influencers' because IRL I am yet to meet a perfect person. Often someone being vulnerable exposes the ugly bits we all have in ourselves. This is why we connect with people but it can also cause us to project. Whatever we feel we are doing / working hard on / struggling with that she isn't - triggers something. The parts of ourselves that we might not be proud of being shown so openly - triggers something. I think in some ways most people here fit in to these two camps ( then we have the wild card, third camp, exclusive to friends and relations of her ex
).Anna is unusually honest and self deprecating - this means she puts her worst foot forward. Likely because of lack of boundaries because she does have a difficult childhood and history.
Anyway, my two pennies worth.
You definitely aren't an expert. You've essentially written the classic "oh are you depressed? Have you tried being..less depressed?".
Don't put words in my mouth. I suffered with postnatal depression after the birth of my child and was diagnosed with depression again after my marriage broke down a year later. Both times I was prescribed sertraline which I took for a few weeks but decided they weren't helping and I took up running instead. Yes everyone deals with depression differently, some people come out the other side, some don't.. but my point was, if something isn't working then try something else. Like I said before, she's in the exact same hole she's been sitting in for two years. Her therapist or GP could be doing more here I think.
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