DAD HAS PANIC ATTACK & LEAVES US ON A DANGEROUS ICE MOUNTAIN PASS! WINTER VAN LIFE NORWAY
Drone shots. Lazy’s fat egg head welcomes us to the vlog. She can’t control her smile because of where they are. Creepstopher is stroking his icicles. She was blown away by Switzerland. Her expectations of Norway have been blown out of the water. She wants to jump out of bed like a child. Mila plays in the snow. Esme and Isla fight with icicles and Isla winces as some of the ice flies into her face. Lazy makes a snow Angel and then puts her coat over her cheese slop tummy. Isla joins in and makes her own Angel. Footage of Lazy and Mila. More footage of Mila in the snow. Drone.
Lazy cannot cope with the views. She feels like she shouldn’t be talking.
Well no you shouldn't. The kids should be in school, not plagiarising Bitesize. They’re on a peninsula thingymabobbydo. Isabelle is taking “shots” of the view. Esme is getting gimble shots on her phone. They got lucky when looking up Norway as the quietest time is winter. Lazy would always choose winteresque feel. They will have to come back in the summer. Cackling at Mila walking. 5 minutes and 10 seconds; that is how long It took before screechy Jace broke the silence. He can’t reach the mountain. Mountains keep growing up and up and up.
Driving and rap music. The plates are blurred out today. Hi Creepstopher. More banging on about the view. She has never felt so dodgy in her entire life. They’re on the scariest road in the whole world with no barrier.
Creepstopher just had the biggest panic attack Lazy has seen him have in his whole life. “I can’t I can’t, I need to get out of the van, I’m putting you all in danger”. They’re on a normal road but with no barriers. Lazy dreamt they were going to fall in the water last night. He has been doing the same on the way up. The road isn’t icy. There is snow and slush but no ice. Footage from Isabelle’s phone. The van is wobbling. Creepstopher puts something onscreen saying there WAS ice on large sections of the road. Back to Lazy, who films him walking way up the road and around the corner to try and get a signal to call mummy. Or maybe go on Tinder. Maybe this is the point they should turn around, drive to the airport and go home. Lazy says Creepstopher has not put them in danger.
Driving. Footage of them driving on the ice Lazy said wasn’t there. They make it to the top. They get out to check out the view. Drone. They finally get the place to themselves. It has exceeded Creepstopher’s expectations. They’re at Stegastein “stega-steen” Viewpoint above the Aurlandsfjord, the most photographed fjord in all of Norway. You could hear a pin drop and the acoustics are insane. It was a scary drive up but numerous vans that are nowhere near as kitted out as the Inghams’ have done it. He worries for everyone with him. He has put the snow chains on to go back down and they have snow tyres. Cars and vans with regular tyres on have driven up. Lazy and Creepstopher get a selfie as the kids have gone back to the van. Isabelle said Switzerland is just as magical. Creepstopher points out where the Spar and church are in the town below. Lazy doesn’t want to forget this moment. Suddenly the almost-silence is broken as Jace and Isla come screeching back over to Lazy and Creepstopher. They have put their coats and hats back on. Creepstopher picks Jace up to show him the view. Lazy was feeding a cat outside the Spar some salmon when a woman walked out and said she’d bought cat food for it. The shop doesn’t like people feeding the cat outside as it encourages it to shoplift. Everyone likes the idea of OLLI but spelt OLLIE.
Drive down the mountain. Drone shot of the town and church. Lazy cannot believe they’re now in a tunnel for 24km so an hour (or two with Creepstopher’s driving). He cringed at the footage pf the 'panic attack'. A tiny weeny one. He’s worried people will laugh at him. Lazy and Isabelle had the chat about stereotypes with him. Men can cry, have panic attacks and feel nervous. Male feelings are the same as womens. We all have irrational feelings. Creepstopher was upset about the shovel last night as he didn’t want to get out of the van but Lazy threatening to get out of the van and do it herself soo got him off his arse. They weren’t doing anything wrong today but Creepstopher has never driven roads like that before. It’s fine to act like that in front of the chuldren so they know dad has feelings. If anyone gives hate or gossip; sort yourself out. I think Creepstopher sets off a stinky one because Lazy says it’s suddenly got very hot. She doesn’t want Jace to think he hasn’t got the right to show emotions the girls can show. Creepstopher pulled over and just said he was panicking. They will laugh about it tonight. No one jumped up and decided to film him having the panic attack. They’re heading to the west coast for insane things.
This was unexpected. The Inghams were driving down the road and got to a ferry port. Cackle. They have to get on a boat. The road just stops. It’s so cool. Creepstopher said there was a ferry. Maybe there’s an option. He selected the no ferry route. Luckily they got here ten minutes before departure. It takes your registration plate and that’s how you pay. Lazy needs a wee wee and wonders if there are toilets on there.
The van toilet not good enough Babe? The Inghams drive off the boat at Mannheller.
Preview of tomorrow. Creepstopher opens the van door to another fjord. Vlog ends with a drone shot of a load of strangers stood on the viewpoint.
End of vlog
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..The eldest is 17 next month and has some funny ways and can be an old diva at times ,but we love her to bits ,and if she decides to sit and stare at the catflap (the little one is out as soon as the sun rises!!
Someone is getting a lot desperate, Everywhere they go 
