The Depression Thread

[Sheabutter]

@LennyBriscoe I can’t say I have answers what you can do, that would be the blind leading the blind, but I know being immersed in something I love always makes me feel better. If that’s tattle for you right now, don’t sweat it. You’ll figure out more things. “The Artist’s Way” just came on my radar. It’s helped a lot of people find remove blocks to creativity and finding themselves:


Hoping you feel better soon

Edit: This book is pretty old. There are certainly more affordable copies out there.

 

[under the ivy]

This is probably a gross question but doesn't anyone else here who suffers from depression/anxiety find that sometimes stress makes them have diarrhoea

Not gross. It happens to me when I’m super anxious and wipes me out. Take care

 

[lotusbiscoff]

I’m having a hard time at the moment. I have no friends, no hobbies, I lost everything I liked about myself.I can’t even look in the mirror without crying because I hate the person I’ve become.

i just can’t see it getting any better from here, I’ve got nothing to look forward to and it’s giving me some really horrible thoughts

Hey, I’m sending you a big hug reading this was sad for me because I’m on the same boat as you regarding lack of friends but just know that you are so important, are valued and you can get through this. It sounds cliche but there’s always light at the end of the tunnel and you are amazing. Just remember to take time to care for yourself - run a lovely warm bath, drink lots of water, cry if you feel like it and spend time taking care of yourself (usually a little bit of ice cream or chocolate won’t do any harm ) sending you all of my best wishes and I know I’m a random person on the internet but you absolutely matter

Im so meh today. I cant bring myself to do anything. I have so much housework to do and I am just exhausted mentally. I've had a lot on, had to return to the office and my friends have been their typical selfish selves leaving me out. I want to not be bothered, but I am.

Hi, I hope you’re doing okay just wanted to reply to say that you’re doing great and it’s absolutely okay not to want to be bothered some days to do things! You’re only human.

I’m so sorry to hear about your friends leaving you out - that’s awful but know that you are great and you’re feeling exhausted which is so normal just take time to go through the motions and be good to yourself

Sorry to just pipe in but I'm so gutted, disappointed and angry I had to write it out somewhere. This guy who I was seeing who one month ago told me he wasn't ready for a relationship walks in to the pub I am in with a girl on his arm and just for good measure he completely ignores me. I dont know what to do with myself right now

Hey, aw that sounds awful. It’s his loss, perhaps it wasn’t meant to be and something better is awaiting for you around the corner but I can imagine seeing that would’ve cut like a knife through the heart. Sending love

 

[LaBlonde]

I find this site helpful when I am really low and need hand-holding on getting the basics taken care of: https://youfeellikeshit.com/ it’s quite simple but often it snaps me out of my low mood enough to then go and do something else afterwards.

Well done for cooking dinner - seriously! I am so lazy, cooking is always the first thing I start slacking on when I feel in a slump.

ETA Don’t be put off by the website name! I promise it’s a nice site!

thank you for mentioning this site - i found it very helpful today and will definitely come back to it

 

[Barbie2020]

I can’t believe how bad mental health services are.

At the last two midwife appointments I’ve had I have explained how much I’m struggling with my mental health. She told me to ring the GP. I’ve finally built up the courage to ring the doctors today and he basically read the text off the NHS website about what to do to help myself when pregnant
I said I don’t feel supported by my midwife and do I have to get to absolute crisis point before they take me seriously?

He ended with telling me he won’t prescribe me any medication as there are risks involved and to ask my midwife to refer me to a perinatal mental health team (I was hoping she’d do this last time I saw her)

There is no point to my post but I am normally a very weak and anxious person and I’m determined to fight for myself and get some kind of support off of somebody who understands.

Does anyone else get really high levels of anxiety when something is due on the calendar, it can be anything at all from something small like a appointment at the vets or a school parents evening. Or even knowing I need to go to the shop for food the next day. Does anyone have any tips to manage it or regulate it at least.

Yes! I have massive struggles with anxiety over every day things. I’m a nervous mess at any type of appointment, get nervous about meeting friends, bumping into people when I’m out etc. I always think it must be part of having social anxiety. I don’t have any tips I’m afraid but know you’re not alone. Have too ever spoken to the GP about this? They may be able to help you

 

[watermelon sugar]

Hey you lovely person. I hope you are feeling better today. BPD combined with depression is very tough to handle (I have both diagnoses as well) so I understand how you feel. Hang in there! Anything you do to help the transition between the high and the low so that the changes are not as sharp?

Aw thanks for your message I'm a bit better but not much. Loads of shit things just keep happening so I'm a bit stressed. When I'm stressed I just go from 0-100 and get so angry and upset. I let it get to me too much and I get upset. Trying to get by for the baby but it's so hard

Hope you're feeling better too darling x

 

[or JusRollWithIt]

@Lilu22 She probably doesn’t know to react. Next time maybe tell her you would appreciate just words of support and not unsolicited advice. I guess it’s quite hard to understand what’s going on if you’ve never had MH issues yourself.

Completely unrelated, but does anyone get itchy skin, especially at night? My skin is fine and healthy, no eczema or other skin diseases, but I have difficulty falling asleep at night because it itches so bad. I’ve found that moisturising it really well before bed helps, but last night I had itchy toes, you don’t really moisturise your toes, do you? I’ve read itching is closely associated with depression and anxiety, surprising how depression can mess you up in some many ways really.

Can it be a circulation issue? Restless Legs Syndrome? Or maybe the detergent used on the sheets?

 

[Sideboard Bob]

My partner has recently had some good news and has been really happy and so positive about our future. I'm struggling a lot but he seems fairly oblivious to it (he knows I still struggle with my mental health, it's chronic at this point, but he hasn't clocked how hard it is right now). Anyway, I am finding it REALLY difficult to be around him. Obviously I want him to be happy! But I'm so irritable and it's grating on me. I just want to be alone, in a dark room, in bed under my duvet. I don't want to speak to or see anyone. It's making me feel worse because I seem like such a horrible person. I think I'm hiding my irritability well - I'm not snapping at him etc. Can anyone relate?

I can relate to the bit in bold. It’s one of the most heartbreaking parts of depression for me. I don’t want to be like this, I know it will help so much to be around people I love but I just isolate myself, I don’t even know why I do it, it’s like a form of self-harm.

 

[Raymond Luxury-Yacht]

Mirtazapine 15mg - I've noticed I am struggling to express happiness too (not that there's much to be happy about) but I am feeling really frustrated @ not being able to cry because I can feel it coming.

I think I can relate @ 'rather go back to being numb' sometimes it's better to not feel sadly.

Here if you want to vent my dear.

I have no experience with Mirtazapine myself, but most side effects should go away after 2-3 months, unfortunately you just have to live through them I’m here if you need someone to talk or rant to And thank you

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________


My dose has been lowered back to 50mg as bigger doses did not seem to be making any difference, and one of my most hated symptoms is back - nausea. Not the morning kind when you have no appetite, but these cramp-style feeling of wanting to vomit when I feel like my self-hatred is especially bad. I never actually vomit though. There are things that trigger it, nothing physical, just some thoughts and emotions. Does anyone have any experience with that? Please please someone tell me what to try as I just can’t bear it anymore I’ve tried everything from bigger doses to sports, breathing and tapping exercises and nothing seems to work for me. Being so miserably divided against yourself is such a horrible feeling, I’m only in my early twenties but I’m already considering having my cards or fortune read just to find out if there is any point in me staying alive.

 

[MissSunshine]

Been on 25mg sertraline for about 3 maybe 4? weeks now. Had all the side effects in the first 2 weeks. Although I am feeling ok dr suggested 50mg as im still just about everything. Am i going to have the same side effects all over?

How should they make you feel? What am I aiming for? Meh has been a nice changed to feeling crap every day hah

sertraline worked well for me - I felt the same - meh - all the time, but after a little while I started to get a bit of a buzz feeing back - a tingling of excitement about things again. I’m on 50mg x

 

[rainbowlemon]

Hello lovely people, how are you doing?

I’m really struggling at the moment. Therapy has helped me loads, I thought I was on the mend and it was decided I’d taper my dose and eventually discontinue Prozac. It’s been 6 days and I’m not doing as swell as I thought I would be. Just feel like crying all of the time and can’t make myself do stuff so I’m procrastinating. I’m also very lonely despite being surrounded by people and am worried about possible weight loss so eating very little too.

I'm sorry you're struggling. Medication tappers should always be done super slowly and ideally with extra support in place. Some people need a minimum time frame of 6+ months. What was your original dose and how much did you decrease your dosage by

Drinking milk is good for calories when you don't feel like eating. Can you get some ready meals so don't have to faff about with cooking?

 

[rainbowlemon]

I haven't read any of this thread. But I pass a lot of my time reading the Katie Price threads lol.
I am 47, my life seems very pointless. There's not one day when I don't have feelings of wishing I wasn't here.
I've felt like this for at least the last 30 years. My family is not close, I see my parents once a year, not from choice, just because that's what is right apparently. Spend Xmas day with them. I dread it!
I just hate existing. Seriously wish I'd never been born.
Sorry for sharing, but that's how I feel.

Sending you love. Have you tried any therapy or medication before? It's okay to read the Katie thread!

Hi all, jumping on this thread. I think I’m going back on my setraline. Very low mood and generally not coping very well. Bit scared as it makes me feel very sick, headachey and with loss of appetitive for a while. I’m in quite a sad place right now and struggle with everyday life. Any tips / advice appreciated.

How long were you on the medication for before?

I know it's cliched but try to take things one moment at a time .

 

[flutternutter]

Me too. I bite my nails (currently have nothing left to bite) and pull out hairs like my eyebrows

 

[candyland_]

Don't you just love it when you suffer from an anxiety disorder and you tell someone you're anxious and they just say "it'll be ok". Yeah really fucking helpful! Im suddenly cured

What could they say to be more helpful?

Its hard to know what to say as someone on the other end of it. I never want to say too much/the wrong thing.

 

[Professor Farnsworth]

How is everyone today? I’m feeling a lot lighter than Weds and looking forward to a chilled night and lie in tomorrow (although no doubt I’ll be awake at 7 because I don’t have to be!). I have linch with my mum on Sunday, which is always tough depending on whether she’s decided to be filtered or not! Hopefully I won’t get the annoying side haha!

 

[WordsFromReuben]

Just wanted to share something I found recently that I keep coming back to, it made me think about my depression and gave me a bit of strength. As they say, it’s always darkest before the dawn.

it’s a poem from Bojack Horseman called The View From Halfway Down.

Spoiler: TW references SH

 

[isabellalovescats]

I still love him and don’t think I’ll ever get over it because it was the last straw before I had a breakdown in 2019. I just can’t believe it’s still so raw after 2 years of no contact.

Sending you so much love. Sometimes, we don’t get over a person totally but we get over them enough over time - we do get to a point where they won’t hold that much power over you.

 

[Professor Farnsworth]

Thank you both for the quick replies. The vague situation was about a final year retake exam i have in early september.

I just feel so exhausted and worn out by everything. I live alone and haven't been home in 11 months either . I've started getting anxiety attacks first thing in the morning too.

I've seen this therapist for 4 years. Had a 6 week break over christmas then stopped seeing him for 4.5 months until I was in crisis last week so had 4 sessions over two weeks.

You sound really stressed and need a break. Can you get home at all for a visit?

 

[Silver Linings]

Please don’t apologise lovely. I’m so so sorry you’re going through this. I wish I could offer some useful advice, I hope someone here can (only if that’s what you want though).
All I can say is that you’re not alone. I can relate a bit because even though I’m going through a pretty bad depression at the moment I hardly ever cry. I used to use unhelpful methods to deal with mental distress, and even though it’s better not to, it’s harder to cope when you don’t have that “coping method”. Ugh I don’t know if I’m making sense now, sorry.
Please, please be kind to yourself today, easier said than done. You’re such a thoughtful, compassionate person, and you don’t deserve to be going through this xx

Thank you, Sidey B. xx

 

[isabellalovescats]

I’m so sorry you feel the same @kachoochoo I’m glad someone understands though, it’s such an isolating feeling.

Just adding complete agreement to both of your statements. People expect me to be fun and happy and outgoing because it’s summer. I have MDD lol I’m not gonna be healed by the sunshine automatically. And I have social anxiety so no, I don’t feel better when I see swarms of people happily socializing out and about.