I don’t wish I could sleep all day but I countdown until I can hide in the bath and go to bed early when I’m having a bad day.
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Yes, I feel this absolutely x
Absolutely wish I could. Quite often do too. I wouldn’t say I sleep, more cat nap, my sleep quality is awful. I put trash on the TV to numb the thoughts and try and ignore my brain.
Not all the time, but just one night of good sleep, insomnia affects me really bad, managed to get hold of a sleeping tab yesterday, has made such a difference to me today, but I know it won't last.
Yeah I do this too. I usually put on something I’ve seen before so I don’t have to concentrate on it
Yes! Absolutely!
I love not being conscious and the break from my own brain that affords.
If I could afford it, I'd definitely have a huge drug problem - I don't trust myself around any opiods/ benzos/ sedatives/ whatever, because I'll just gobble em up to avoid.... Myself.
@candyland_ - I too 'hide' in the bath and then scuttle off to bed early whenever possible. My partner hates it, but I'd be tit company if I hung about anyway, so might as well be catatonic in a nice scaldy bath
Exactly this. Something that I can doze too and still know exactly what’s going on.
As soon as it gets to half 7 I escape for an hours soak.Yes! Absolutely!
I love not being conscious and the break from my own brain that affords.
If I could afford it, I'd definitely have a huge drug problem - I don't trust myself around any opiods/ benzos/ sedatives/ whatever, because I'll just gobble em up to avoid.... Myself.
@candyland_ - I too 'hide' in the bath and then scuttle off to bed early whenever possible. My partner hates it, but I'd be tit company if I hung about anyway, so might as well be catatonic in a nice scaldy bath
Is it normal to need space from people you love when you’re having a tough time?
I think so. I tend to hibernate from everyone...though sometimes I do it for too long and it actually makes me worse.
Some days my first thought after waking up is to count in how many hours I'll be able to go back to bed.
It is for me.
And when I'm doing ok as well tbh, my MH really benefits from time on my own (and takes a dive when that's not possible).
What's tricky (for me) is telling those people that I need some time alone. Some people won't take that well and be offended, some people just cant/won't understand, and I personally find it hard to bring up.
I hope you can get a break x
still struggling. man, ocd is the worst. i thought my hit and run ocd was bad but this spiral has lasted about two weeks now and i just can’t deal with it. i’m gonna write under a spoiler just to get it out but warning that it’s about contamination ocd, just for anyone who might find that triggering.i am in an ocd spiral right now. won’t say exactly about what in case it triggers some peoples’ contamination fears but i wish that my ocd brain listened to the actual logical part of my brain that’s saying “no, look at all the evidence, you don’t have [thing]”. drives me crazy
basically, i have convinced myself i have bedbugs. this is based on no solid facts or evidence, purely that i woke up with blood on my pyjama top about two weeks ago. went into work and co-worker said “oh that happened to me when we had bed bugs”. well, it was an epic downward spiral since then. confirmed the blood was from a pimple i had obviously picked in the night, still convinced it is bugs. found black flecks on my bedding, confirmed to be mascara, convinced it is bugs. found what must be part of a leaf in my luggage from a hotel stay two months ago, sent a photo to bedbugs uk, they confirmed no bugs. a bug crawled on me today after moving patio furniture, took a photo and sent it to bedbugs uk, they confirmed no that’s not a bed bug and are probably on the verge of sending someone around to check on me.
i’ve tried all my usual coping mechanisms, all my usual routines but i can’t shake this one. when i found the leaf i genuinely sat on the floor and cried. when i looked at the photo i’d sent the next day i was like wtf at my past self but my brain is still saying “but what if”. there is literally no evidence but the thought of getting into my bed of a night is making me want to cry..
it’ll pass, i know, it always does but i truly hate my brain most of the time.
Bless you my love, I know exactly this feeling. I can offer you so many different perspectives you could see situations like that from but when you feel like that it’s so hard to get those round your head and see it that way.
You are beautiful inside and out. I have a compliment jar my therapist had me set up, that helps. Google thought logs those are helpful with seeing different perspectives too. You’re probably exactly like me in putting too much importance on appearance so you therefore think other people see your perceived ‘flaws’
sending love to you, you are not measured by your looks or what some rando in a bar thinks of you.
always here if you need a chat x
If you had bed bugs you would also have the bites. Which are itchy and red . I understand there’s no arguing with an ocd brain.
Is there anyone you can go to for extra support?
thankfully there is (i’m very blessed in that regard i guess, my family and friends are always there to talk) but it sounds so silly and ridiculous that i’m almost embarrassed to talk about it.
i haven’t been to a doctor/therapy for my ocd for a while and i’m not currently on medication, but i think it’s probably time for me to take a step with regards to that.
I’m back again. Been struggling for ages but ‘just’ writing that down has felt too difficult. But today is particularly dark and I wanted to reach out because I’m feeling more alone than ever.
I’m going to try to get things off my chest but I’ll put it in a spoiler so you don’t have to read if you don’t want to (I won’t be offended
). Apologies if the spoiler doesn’t work - I hardly post on Tattle so I’ve never done one before!!
To finish on a more positive note, I have to give some credit to my cat. He makes me smile even on days like today. 
I’m going to try to get things off my chest but I’ll put it in a spoiler so you don’t have to read if you don’t want to (I won’t be offended
). Apologies if the spoiler doesn’t work - I hardly post on Tattle so I’ve never done one before!!I genuinely feel like I have nothing to live for. I can’t work due to health conditions and tbh I spend 99% of my days in bed. Financially I can’t do anything nice for myself, not even a hair cut so naturally I feel awful about myself and my self image. I l’m autistic so struggle with friendships at the best of times but I have no friends now. I genuinely feel so alone. All my hobbies I either can’t afford to do or can’t do because of my health. Getting no help from mental health services or social work/social care. I just can’t shake the fact that no one gives a crap and no one would miss me.
Your cat would miss youI’m back again. Been struggling for ages but ‘just’ writing that down has felt too difficult. But today is particularly dark and I wanted to reach out because I’m feeling more alone than ever.
I’m going to try to get things off my chest but I’ll put it in a spoiler so you don’t have to read if you don’t want to (I won’t be offended
To finish on a more positive note, I have to give some credit to my cat. He makes me smile even on days like today.I genuinely feel like I have nothing to live for. I can’t work due to health conditions and tbh I spend 99% of my days in bed. Financially I can’t do anything nice for myself, not even a hair cut so naturally I feel awful about myself and my self image. I l’m autistic so struggle with friendships at the best of times but I have no friends now. I genuinely feel so alone. All my hobbies I either can’t afford to do or can’t do because of my health. Getting no help from mental health services or social work/social care. I just can’t shake the fact that no one gives a crap and no one would miss me.
And I’m sure lots of other people would too. X
Sending love and hugs to everyone struggling
My GP had taken me off Zoloft again. I've been on it for a month, and in that month my insomnia (which I've had for 30 years) has been so terrible I've had a really hard time coping, and it's affected my other health conditions too.
I'm starting back on prozac tomorrow, which is what I was on before the Duloxetine.
My GP had taken me off Zoloft again. I've been on it for a month, and in that month my insomnia (which I've had for 30 years) has been so terrible I've had a really hard time coping, and it's affected my other health conditions too.
I'm starting back on prozac tomorrow, which is what I was on before the Duloxetine.
Does anyone struggle with family having zero empathy?
I said to my mum today I was struggling because I had to work, watch my 3 year old, and then when I picked him up from nursery in the afternoon he had a massive tantrum. I had to walk him home dragging his heels, and I'm stressed and she's just like "well that's what it's like having a family" this pure smug look on her face. I find that she has zero empathy at all. I just don't f..cking get it and it enrages me. I feel like I want to have an angry cry.
I said to my mum today I was struggling because I had to work, watch my 3 year old, and then when I picked him up from nursery in the afternoon he had a massive tantrum. I had to walk him home dragging his heels, and I'm stressed and she's just like "well that's what it's like having a family" this pure smug look on her face. I find that she has zero empathy at all. I just don't f..cking get it and it enrages me. I feel like I want to have an angry cry.
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