The Chateau Diaries #40 Vampire of the vanities, the grifters return

[lyna]

I still don't understand why Potts and NL have not fired her.

Because they have a great thing going.
They are off doing what they want living their lives and she is stuck in the middle of armpit France forced to let every Tom, Dick, and Harry into her home so she can try to keep from feeling lonely, in between escaping on trips that give her excitement she really craves. And even then, she has to have someone chateau sit so she can fly away. She is not really free.

For better or for worse she is taking care of the B&B, superficially maintaining the property, and house sitting... Now she is shackled as the cash cow. Nic and Potts still come and go as they please but with the added relief that she is raking it in and she won't have to bother them for money.

When have Nic and Potts gotten their pinkies sullied. What? They write a check? Easy. They come there for vacations and parties and bragging rights. And yeah well sometimes to chase the sheep...
Hmmm

No innuendo there...


It's unfortunate... She bought CdLL the same year my family and I stayed in an utterly gorgeous chateau in the Dordogne. It was in good shape at the time and newly purchased by a 40 something year old couple, but clearly they were making improvements. In between catering to us they were working their butts off fixing, gardening, cooking, cleaning, etc... At the time the owner told us he was desperate to find a good chef because he wanted to up the ante with his restaurant. The meals we had there were already quite good. Lamb chops sizzling on a beautiful wooden platter surrounded by freshly picked petit vegies and herbs from the garden. My 2 1/2 year old ate 4 chops and cleaned the bones! DIVINE!!! They now have a 4 star luxury accommodation that is one of the top chateau/hotels in the region. Stefanny said her business was just breaking even at the beginning on C-19... !!!


It is not rocket science why she doesn't have as solid a business as this couple. I kind of feel sorry for her. She has sacrificed every last bit of her privacy, which she may or may not care about as she likes to be the center of attention... But if she ever decided she wants a break from the spectacle or her patreons smarten up, she will lose everything...

What will Pots and Nicky lose?

The chateau makes her feel important, like she IS somebody.

Yup!
And because it's cool and grandiose to say I'm going to a house party at a chateau, people will lick her boots for an invite...
All the tacky tiaras, utterly ridiculous onsie costumes, and faffing about with china that really deep down they don't care about makes them feels like they are in a club with a secret handshake...
If she didn't have parties the crickets would be deafening and the hedgehogs would take over. But she needs a gimmick to get them there. And now of course there is YouTube fame... Sad.

 

[Gibson]

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During the pandemic a sweet friend of mine suggested I watch this channel. I was shocked when she informed me about being a Patron for $100 a month. I immediately had to inform her of this new scam. I kindly asked her to stop take that $1,200 a year place in a CD earning interest for her only niece. To my utter surprise because she can be hard-headed at times she agreed. This Chatelaine (and many more I'm sure) is a shameless money grubbing hussy like her co-owners. The entire lot selfish absorbed narcissists' preying on the lonely, introverted, socially awkward individuals and the perverts that relish a new 15 minutes of fame limelight.

I agree. It's a weird business plan where your employees rely on their wages from well wishers. In order to receive said wages, they have to become bit players in a comedy of errors.
Introducing:
The lady of the manor-Enter stage left wearing a see through dress, laughing manically and pretending to know historical facts when reading from Google.
The ladies maid- Philip. Wears ladies pants, long hair, snorts a lot and likes to film. Obsessed with hedhogs for show.
The Floral killer- likes to sacm people with sob stories about teats and confidence. Has pretended to reinvent herself. Will disappear to the UK with her new car...never to be seen again.
The quiet man Selmar- was in the good books, but managed to escape. Currently being conned by an online love. He is under the illusion patrons will fund a Shitoo. Lives in the woods in a van.
Introducing Nati- sorts packages and checks rooms. Will occasionally wear a push up bra in competition with Steph. Not much else.
The elusive Nik. Will push his step family in front of the camera for dosh, occasionally chases sheep with a paper bag over his head.
Potty- will bake bread, take photos, still hang around Steph even though he has another squeeze.
All of them taking their pound of flesh from the patrons.

 

[TheTaxInspector]

*** BULLSHIT ALERT ***

Anyone catch the gaffe in the "Château" de Brives flog? The part where Pavlova's husband, Georges, who makes a point of trying to sound authoritative every time he speaks, explains how the stone balusters were made. According to him, they were turned on a machine (SJ, who's a complete ignoramus, just said "Yes, yes") ... . Fell about laughing when I heard that! I know all about working with stone - a métier that's been in my family for centuries (my ancestors owned their own quarries in southern England). One of my brothers is a sculptor who's worked on various monuments historiques in France and he can carve just about anything out of stone. The balusters were not turned on a lathe, they were made by hand with a chisel and a mallet or hammer - a very long process. More proof, if any were needed, that the people who own these places are complete cretins - they own all sorts of objects, about which they know nothing and cannot make themselves.

 

[Marquis de Potpourri]

"...Trips to these amazing chateaux made me realize I want to completely redecorate here."
(STOP DYI DECORATING. YOUR TASTE IS AWFUL. HIRE BUNNY WILLIAMS. YOU CAN AFFORD HER NOW.)

"There's just too much stuff here."
(STOP GOING TO BROCANTES AND BUYING STUFF YOU DON'T NEED OR HAVE NO PLACE FOR! TELL HER, CAT, TELL HER AGAIN!)
(I RECOMMEND A BONFIRE OF VANITIES, LALANDE STYLE!)

"Nothing's properly planned...organized."
(HIRE AN INTERIOR DESIGNER. YOU'RE TOO ECCENTRIC TO ORGANIZE. YOU'RE A HOARDER. GET THERAPY.)

"There is no point in getting beautiful things for this home until it's clear and organized."
(SOMEONE SHOULD TAKE YOUR CREDIT/DEBIT CARD OFF YOUR HANDS. YOU SPEND UNCONTROLLABLY ON UGLY USELESS THINGS.)

 

[witchgrass]

I think SJ has been very generous to Mari , given her a home and a studio and a following ! It’s a shame that I feel Marie holds jealousy towards her and is shady ! Think her channel will die as soon as she leaves la lande !

She doesn't have a channel without Lalande. I L-buttoned my way through her latest and slowed down when she finally stopped talking to herself in the mirror, touching her hair while staring at herself and went outside. "look at that can you see that it's so stunning wow so pretty and look oh my look at this that's so stunning all of these have been popping out just...recently I think? That is so stunning wow gosh. smells amazing (laughs) wow." Do some research on the flowers, talk about different varieties, mention poisonous plants and how they were used to murder people in medieval times. Something. anything.

Pet the cat Marie.

 

[Seeingitasitis]

Half yearly predictions for this time next year: SJ $600,000 dollars richer - despite profligate spending in designer shops and brocantes. Selmar: No change, Will have been fleeced of his Patron money by Tatty Arna. Philip: $80000 poorer - having used his grandparent inheritance, his earnings from Steph and added $2 from his earnings from theatre work and a high interest loan from Steph - bought ten per cent in the chateau - and it being worthless. Marie: Net worth - scrap value of car, last heard of living in someone's attic in the UK and cooking their dinner. Kat: Prestige job involving choirs in the UK and doing very nicely, having met someone gorgeous whilst home for Christmas. Playmobile Davy (thanks for that) still working but spending every scrap of annual leave at LaLande, the playmobile lost in the attic and refused another airing. Dan fired in favour of a Capability Brown type character but has his revenge by planting 10000 pumpkins in the flower beds and Japanese knotweed in the fountain. All filmed by his drone and his subscribers and patrons vastly increasing in numbers as they view the fall out.

 

[Espe]

That speaks volumes. She really doesn't get what it means to be a property owner

I think one of the main problems with SJ and what distinguishes her from all the other chateau owners is that she does not do one single thing herself to contribute to the work in progress on the chateau, except for making vlogs which just means filming her ("friends") slaves living their lives and partying and filming anyone who is actually dong any work. (I wonder if she actually asks any real work people if they mind being interrupted and asked daft questions by a mad woman in heels and a mini skirt while they are working, then she throws it all together (it's hardly skilled editing!). This is completely different from all the other chateau owners, who, while they may also be grifters, are actually doing a lot of physical work themselves on their buildings and very often also running a wedding or some other business in addition to making vlogs. SJ is doing f. all; she lets others run the business, do the skivvying and all the physical work. She may have made some curtains many years ago but now she does zero work at all, apart from the vlogging. This, and the knowledge that she inherited a great deal of money; spends as if there is no tomorrow, and travels the globe, all adds to the evidence that she is a despicable individual using other people to finance her decadent lifestyle. Every single one of the other chateau owners, whether we like them or not, has achieved something as well as grifting, but she just sits back, sips the champagne and watches the money rolling in. She doesn't even manage or organise anything. She knows that all the supporters out there are sad fools and so she will continue to exploit them. She has absolutely no conscience at all. She is far worse than any of the others in my opinion.

somewhat lazy

Only "somewhat"??!!

I think the dress is from H*M, so nothing special, and most likely worn by many.

She looked much nicer in that dress than SJ!

 

[Bleu Lala]

I completely agree. The start of today's vlog grossed me out with the state of the windows and wall in SJ's boudoir. Not 25 seconds into her monologue she states: "All of the recent trips that I've taken to these amazing chateaux have made me realized that I want to completely redecorate here."

That's all it took? Going to other chateaux? I couldn't live one week in a room in such disrepair -- let alone sixteen years.

Forget about redecorating, try doing the most basic of repairs.

I thought the same thing.
Hey, Stef you do not need to redecorate, you need to renovate.
While the money is pouring in, now is the time to get the building itself functional, livable and in solid shape. Do a couple of fun side projects for yourself and the viewers but you’ve got serious issues with the structure itself and those should be your priority, not the newest shiny object in front of you.
Oh and ps the gift grab is tacky and very off putting…

 

[Seeingitasitis]

OUCH !

From their latest (boring) CD vlog :

NB :
Cat has become like them : playing the nice girl (her role in this comedy) and making the same Awww ! and Ohhh ! as them. The scene when they were reunited with Natti was ridiculous as was the scene in the attic with the Chatelaine childhood "souvenirs" (for the video of course).

It's contagious...



Claudine Retif
4 hours ago
"Badly Done Stephanie. Badly done indeed!" I was again offended by your Patreon plug while opening Davey's gifts. It was like: "Here's a teaser for all you nobodies but the posh get to see the whole show. Why waste such fine porcelain on the vulgar, poor, masses." Likewise, an episode or so ago, Ian, Davey, Philip, and you were discussing building plans. The great unwashed got a taste, then cut to the Patreons for the rest of the tour. Odious! I was actually considering getting a small Patreon subscription for my sister because she always feels so small whenever she gets cut out. Alas, now I will not get the account because it would seem like rewarding crash behaviour. Did some Youtube genius tell you to plug Patreon this way?? Remember, you gained 100,000 subscribers being rather ordinary and down to earth. You always took great pains to make even your humblest viewer feel like part of the team merely because they watched all the adverts and "liked" you. Now your getting spoiled! One more point, at the beginning of this episode you said you wanted to have a more professionally decorated / organized chateau. I'm all for order but. . . Why watch your chateau if yours just like everyone elses - antiseptic? Seems to have lost your common touch?! Hopefully someone can talk some kindness and humility back into you before it is too late. You're too good for this! We need the grateful for small things, lockdown Stephanie back.
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REPLY

She has a point. But everyone is on a hierarchy, depending on how much they give. I know this as a humble lower tiered patron. I have thrice given Stephanie the benefit of my Agony Aunt advice by messaging. Once was to stop the GAG and instead donate $1000 a month to a charity of her choice from her personal income now she can afford it. Next was to stop Loki and his ilk making distasteful comments on the live chat (and no, I am not a homophobe), Lastly I advised her to install a security system in the chateau for her personal safety and if this was unaffordable, to at least have a simple system in the main rooms and main points of entry and, most importantly, a panic alarm by her bed. Response: There was no money available to do this and worded in such a way that if I was that concerned, I could donate. You cannot help some people. Interest in you is directed correlated to how much you donate or what rubbish you send. I accept this, and remain a lowest tier patron for the content only, although it is constantly under review and if the patron content does not improve, I will be gone.

 

[Jeeves]

Thanks for clarifying @Milre

So Davey's family has had a clean out of a 5 bedroom home and sold and donated boxes of Playmobil and plates to SJ. The jug and bowl was nice, but still. So what will actually happen to the Playmobile? Who will play with it? One helpful commenter on vlog shared that heat will yellow all the white aspects of the plastic, advising to turn airconditioning on!

I am still confused about why he felt that he needed to take his Playmobile collection to the HMN?

 

[MarquisOfNadaillac]

I CANNOT emphasize how angry this makes me!

MANY hard working, honest people make this amount a YEAR! Yet she makes it in a month for putting out some poorly edited and filmed vlog of her ~*prodigal*~ life and it seems like there is no end to it, I just don't understand!

People work 40+ hours a week, maintain their own homes, have families to take care of and still somehow manage to make things work for them despite all the difficulties of real life... yet wannabe Princess Stephanie makes this amount a MONTH and still can't seem to manage her life or home. It is criminal, corrupt and offensive, and that is without mentioning her "charity channel." Her whole life has been funded by her daddy and mummy, idiot ex boyfriends, and the literal grandmas she is ripping of her exclusive "content" of her getting more gifts (a la Davy) to fill the shitoo with.

Has anyone in the US seen the show American Greed? I feel like we need an episode on Fanny to really expose how corrupt and wrong this all is..


*Understand that median is different than mean $, but feel it proves my point even more!

 

[cafcool]

Due to not having a crumbling crack den or a gaggle of fawning sycophants to exploit I’m struggling to support a bone idle lifestyle. So I’m developing a new paint colour range aimed at the Shitoe Chic (cheek?) market & would appreciate any feedback:


Harrow & Ballbag, an exciting new paint palette inspired by Fanny’s Folly

Festival of faeces - a sludgy amalgamation of rodent poop (AKA seven shades of shit).

Crimson de cringe - the universal cult complexion when Fanny oozes fugazi opening the spoils of sponging

Jaundice joie de vivre - a myriad of magical yellow shades ranging from faded pee stain to vintage peacock vomit.


This paint is paaarfect for polishing turds & masking cracks, dust, mould, electric tape, snide pervy art, dirt and blatant begging.

 

[Jikki2]

Since we have been discussing the emoji mafia, I also would like to understand why Marquise de Tandoori is too chicken sh!t to say anything but will be angry with an emoji. I myself have been a victim of such Tandoori chicken attack and so following the fine example of Mr. Teabag, I shall be starting a Go Fund Me to help me recover from this grave emotional trauma.

 

[The quiet one]

I wonder how much money is being laundered...

Well something needs to be laundered the clothes aren't

 

[LonePalm]

Well, I have to give to Sir Methrick for putting an end to the gift grift train not that he ever aspired to Steph level. Then again for all we know she put him up to it.

I just watched this, I have to say as much as I dislike him, I give him credit for asking people to stop sending gifts. We all know he hopes they will make that up with $$$.

Well fellow Tattlers, I am off to pack for my first trip in over a year. I unlike other people we all know of, have obeyed the rules, am fully vaxed and excited to see my son in NYC. I trust you all will keep me up to date on all the nonsense!

 

[Definitely Maybe]

When people say 'if BJJ lost his job' what exactly IS his job ????

 

[Cardinal]

Why are the pews not done? Where is the pergola? Selmar doesn’t even have his floor down and he was given that saw table almost a year ago. Always good to have a side hustle but not when you cannot do your main job. You are wearing out your welcome and you have it made in the shade, literally you have a camp site to grow old at. Everything you have dreamed about, nature, animals, work when you want, travel when you please. People to have fun with but the solitary life you need to keep you sane and creative. You do jobs behind the scenes, it’s time to do them on screen so we don’t have to see Snorty!

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I find it irksome to defend any of these fruitcakes but at last I must. If she hadn't filled Selmar's head of a secret tunnel with hidden treasure the bathroom may have been finished within a reasonable time. The pews project stalled because the chapel had to be emptied so the restorer could complete the restoration (free of course) no wonder he hasn't shown up yet. The pergola is on hold until Playmobil Davy completes the entire SketchUp for the estate whilst Dan plants tomatoes and pumpkins wherever it pleases him Selmar is a part-time employee and not a slave chained to the Mistress of the house. I'm sure that he is not showcasing much of Lalande because her Highness is worried it will show up before ETTCDIY airs or she doesn't get to showcase it first. I agree with less snorty but that would apply to most of that wayward crew.

 

[Cardinal]

I for one definitely thought that PJ is gay. But then I thought about his age and my daughter is his age and all her friends and so many of them I say at least 30% of them are bi. With this more enlightened generation. I think def SJ is over Selmar. Did you notice how she was kind of rude about the trees in a way like I don’t want these down you could take these down but I want to leave these after he said he wanted to remove them they weren’t great trees and he wanted to put his van there.

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Due to her narcissism it was about dominance. She obviously didn't want Selmar calling the shots in front of that tree surgeon. Most of the trees Selma marked looked like absolutely crappy and needed to go. Instead of her being thankful (seeing in the video that the lumber shack is organized due to Selma) she immediately has to play Queen B. The rest of the chateau looks like CRAP but she wants to pretend that these specific trees are beautiful and magical. Selmar was looking for a place of respite away from the noise. She immediately started to pretend to care for the animals when Selmar mentioned feeding them and didn't have a clue where the peahen was. It's all smoke and mirrors and she has to be the center of everything. The ultimate selfish Chatelaine

 

[Jeeves]

No g

Well, I have to give to Sir Methrick for putting an end to the gift grift train not that he ever aspired to Steph level. Then again for all we know she put him up to it.

No gifts from the back of Great Aunt Nellie's china cabinet or the musty fabric you picked up in the charity. shop - just send me cash. Remember the paint that I "paid for out of my own money," What??????

 

[ploppityplop2]

Cat with her coffee........ She doesn't let SJ stomp on her , But Philip comes marching in like a hurricane to maintain his spot.