The Chateau Diaries #40 Vampire of the vanities, the grifters return

[Milre]

Pumpkins between the roses? Now I'm speechless... Next time he will discard his sons pampers just to see how far he can go?

I have particularly followed the shutter dogs as I didn't know what they were. First the dutch lady painter was given the job by SJ to count the windows and how many would needed. Then if I'm remembering correctly BJJ and her had to research to find the amount needed in the look wanted. I can't remember if they have been purchased. SJ commented that a shitter could fall on someone's head so it was important.
So basic building info for safety or insurance reasons such as how many windows your home has is not readily known. Reminds me of a story I once read (not sure if true) that Charles and Andrew once set out to count every room and open every door at BP. They gave up after a few days as there were so many little old rooms.

The shutter dogs are there, the guys who repaired the terrace were supposed to put them up. My guess they promised her to come back later and do it but never called back because now since the weather is better the have better projects to do. And she was not persistent enough to follow through but probably paid them already for the the terrace job.
She will have a hard time to find someone to do it because it is time consuming but not much to be earned with it. Selmar does only wood, Phil is afraid to fall off the window, Gerry is too small, Oliver would only paint the view,
Michael Potts will say " oh, this needs to be done", Nick can't see through the bag, Isabelle will say "o, if I stay in South Africa I am not afraid anymore that the shutters fall on my head." Dan would use his render pistol but it's too high.
But Michael Petherick promised to do it once he is finished with the cottage

 

[lyna]

It has been pointed out many times before but she had the budget to travel to London once a month and Venice every year and who knows how many other destinations. She also hoarded tons of crap. She has never been poor but her pile of stones in the middle of nowhere just wasn't her priority until the place started to earn her massive piles of cash.

Yup! I posted pretty much the same thing before I saw your comment... I can't remember how many countries it was, but when I started to smarten up to the con, in one of my posts I listed the countries she visited the year before lockdown. I was astounded that for someone who cried poor me, she was remarkably well traveled...

OK I just fished it out from my very first ever Tattle Life rant post...
In ONE year~
!!!!!!
Egypt, Venice, Rhodes, Scotland, Portugal, Tallinn, Helsinki, New York, Vermont, South Africa, Vietnam, Paris and London multiple times, as well as multiple trips around France, African Safari

Cry me a river...

 

[MrsPoker]

Did you spot that the NZ lady is wearing a different colour way of the same dress SJ was wearing in the latest vlog?
How on earth could you dare to ask volunteers to prepare an evening meal for 14 with all their allergies within two hours of arriving in Lala land (especially when they had said their skill was furniture restoration).

I just listened again and she said our skills were furniture restoration, and we cooked.... still, I can cook too, but I be buggered if I would want to cook for 14 people I didnt know, in someone elses kitchen as soon as I arrived, especially with all their special requirements! Vegi, non vegi, some gluten free, some dairy free, some nut free, some salt free, some sugar free! - honestly, thats just taking the piss!

 

[Seeingitasitis]

I agree wholeheartedly. I started as a fan, became quite suspicious, and now watch to try to figure out what the hell is actually going on. I suspect many watch Marie for clues. Same with Selmar. When they are out of the sphere, there’s no reason to continue. I do continue to believe that Stephanie ran out of cash and used what little she had to keep up appearances by still traveling and partying with her old friends. She’s hung on to the old designer clothes from a more lucrative time and had to budget to be able to do that. Now, she’s able to spend again. She’s not going to stop unless the money dries up. She didn’t work on the chateau or get anything done because she was depressed that she was cash poor, and developed a drinking problem along the way. She won’t admit that though because it doesn’t go along with the appearance she’s trying to maintain. She’s basically still in college, competing in the pageant of Fabulousness with her old friends. I do think she’s grateful, because she had no future whatsoever before her youtube success.

I agree with you entirely. There was a lot of money to inherit when Mummy goes and when Gerry goes, but a huge gap to be filled until then - and the Patrons have been a lifesaver for her. Now she does not have to concentrate on B&B or workshops. She has money to spend on the life she could only dream of. She does have talent and I have liked watching her. Chats about the chateau, the back story, the interest in history and the trips out were good. Now it is all about manic conversations with people trying to work and spending with no curation. I cannot be the only one losing interest.

 

[Tartuffe]

I would not like to stay anywhere with windows in this condition. Just plain gross!

I completely agree. The start of today's vlog grossed me out with the state of the windows and wall in SJ's boudoir. Not 25 seconds into her monologue she states: "All of the recent trips that I've taken to these amazing chateaux have made me realized that I want to completely redecorate here."

That's all it took? Going to other chateaux? I couldn't live one week in a room in such disrepair -- let alone sixteen years.

Forget about redecorating, try doing the most basic of repairs.

 

[Bored Mermaid CC]

some thoughts on Marie
we do not like the flowers we see
we do not like them in a wine box
even if she added lots of phlox
we do not want hear her tales of sadness
we can not stand her overall blandness
not all chateau inhabitants are meant to Vlog
we’d be rather pleased to watch one with Milre’s dog
maybe instead of begging on YouTube for folks to send her money
with her tales of being bulled by Tattlers who are funny
she should re-examine grifting away her years
and find a career which doesn’t aggravate all her fears
however, we shall not tell her what to do
because she’s actually duplicitous enough to say ‘fuck you’

 

[Clara Burnett]

I wasn't saying anything about things in the past, I just commented on what is happening now.

What's happening now does not differ from what has happened in the past, except for this (you probably would call this very minor) detail of having buckets of money coming in, based on smoke, mirrors and straight out lies. The thing is, now that she can afford to proceed professionally with the renovations, she's still using volunteers and amateurs. There's no excuse for that, she didn't deserve that amount of money to begin with but to now waste it like that is just as shameful.

 

[Milre]

Omg, I need to take some time off and reconsider my life. I should become a vlogger : just film whatever, there are people somewhere watching it. .... So Marie made a philosophical speech of how important it is to leave a room clean and how her mother implemented it in her youth, gets applauded by her fans, then Nati comes for inspection and finds spots on the radiator, a dead fly and spider webs. (it seems she has experience, why would she not trust her to have cleaned it properly?) lots of giggling there and then Natti gives her 9.5 out of 10 points.
Why, why would you post something like this? And even think people like to watch her failing? And not even see that it's failing. A dead fly is Zero points.... Was there no other content to be made? Then showing the Fiskars tool in each and single video which she probably didn't even pay herself but had it on her amazon wishlist ... No, Marie, they are never going to offer you sponsorships, people will believe their tools kill plants.

Another poor bouquet for Tina, (Ian, don't forget to return the box, please) oh, and we learn that there are rules in the garden:
1. She can pick some but only if for the chateau (what else?)
2. She should leave some and not pick all of them
(would be good for the wild ones, too)
3. The garden is for the guests to enjoy

And is she afraid of Dan? Or any other men?

Omg, she used to make me angry, but now I even feel pity.... And I never do, I am a mean person usually.

So please let me know: if I film myself watching CD (usually while doing my laundry) , then writing here on tattle (usually during work, so you people will only see me either on the toilet or staircase or ugly smokers area - no I don't smoke but smokers seem to be more fun people).... Do you think people will watch this?
Patreons get to decide what comments I like or dislike.
I have to find a catchy channel name (Lalande must be mentioned, also Chateau and tattle)
Shall I go for the sexy MILF with cocktail ? (there's a lot of drinking at my work because clients gift us plenty of champagne and there's always someone's birthday)
Or the lazy housewife without makeup doing laundry half-naked? (at least I wouldn't need to change)
Or all natural showing my garden and animals? (it's actually a white garden - I do suffer from decision fatigue- and I follow fengshui rules so it's really beautyful and bee- and birdfriendly)

I had a sad childhood and have hashimoto and hairloss so I do qualify, right ? My husband could pop in every now and then, people usually like him more than me, so there can even be a spin off chanel....

 

[stella65]

My tween in the car today, out of the blue “that la la land show, it’s really boring now, all they do is talk and show cooking. It used to be really good when they showed them fixing stuff, you know like the walls and the garden. And everything is messy, and doesn’t match. They need to get mummy and Selma back”. Out of the mouths of babes!!! (We watched the show during our 5/6 month lockdown during our winter to help us through, now I watch just to see the train wreck it’s become, my son just switches off and asks if we can watch something else!)

 

[MarquisOfNadaillac]

Found her next TV appearance!

 

[Dippy Hippy]

I don't have a bleak view of old age, I have a bleak view of her old age.

Surrounded by sycophants, opportunists and narcissistic giggolos? I think I would pass, Venice or no Venice, it is still a miserable existence when you try to buy friendship and, dare I say it, love.

Yes, buying love isn't great, but I have to say, as a retired person of 70, I'd love to have money to spend on gigolos and sycophants and live in Venice. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy here in the UK with my garden, my Women's Institute meetings and my art groups, but you make the thought of a disgraceful old age in Venice with gigolos sound most attractive. I'm going to start saving! .My grandchildren can come and visit whenever they like.

 

[Miss Trunchbull]

 

[Heathcliffe]

My prediction when Marie moves to England ; It all falls flat on its face. She will soon lack patreons and goodwill. She will need to go into hospitality and serve again. I think a lot of her misfits pay for patreon because she is part of the Lalande gang. Once she no longer is, I bet their interest in her will fade quickly. I bet she will blame Stephanie for her misfortune, in her bitter way. She will think that if Stephanie had given her more opportunities at Lalande, she would have been a success. She is tolerating her mistress now, because she must, but the jealousy is so close to the surface, green. As she ages her "cute as a button" act won't work, it is now she should have put in the right work, done the right things. Instead she is manifesting fame and trying to be Stephanie, won't work.

 

[Heathcliffe]

Before I prepare for tomorrow, I shall have a grumpy rant after watching CD. As I told my wife, if she EVER tried to decorate our bedroom with that horrible toile pattern, no matter if it was 800 years old, I would veto it. No way would I ever have that twee stuff on my bed, curtains, or elsewhere. I happily let my wife decorate and redecorate, I don't have to get involved...and now I see how lucky I am. There are women out there...who wants toile de joy or whatever it is called, all around their rooms, even on the walls. That is , surely, the work of Satan.

 

[Marquis de Potpourri]

Here's a project list from early 2021 when I was still a patron. I can't answer any questions about it but am sharing for your perusal.

THAT'S DESPICABLE!
We can't get over the sheer amount of money being poured into Lalande and how it's carelessly squandered by STEPHANIE JARVIS, who bought a fixer-upper chateau but can't afford it! When will people realize that they are being USED and ABUSED? They are financing the renovation of a house that will never ever be theirs. It's not even an investment where they can expect a return. It's just one eccentric, selfish madwoman who is living her pointless dream at the expense of others in exchange for bread and circuses on YouTube.

Stephanie Jarvis, IF YOU CAN'T AFFORD IT, YOU DON'T DESERVE IT. If you can afford it by using other people's money, you still don't deserve it.

 

[Clara Burnett]

The situation with @Clara Burnett was entirely different - she was personally targeted by a long series of unpleasant posts. Original tattlers will recall the "Valerie" situation where one of our much missed Tattlers was subjected to an onslaught of attack from CD superfans. Neither of them moaned about it.

True. I feel it’s detrimental to what we are doing here, sharing honest opinions about criminals who seem to get away with scamming and grifting. There’s going to be some discussion for sure and it helps to develop a thicker skin for some of the insults and not to take them too serious or personal. My hidden identity obviously helps too, although I recently found out it actually causes distress to my friends, who are randomly accused of being me by shitshow people discussed here, including Dear Brenda (they communicated this to SJ through a mutual friend). I did not foresee that, not having spoken to them for a long time, and I don’t wish anything bad on them. But hey, it was their own choice to be part of SJ‘s entourage once, even if it was before the big money scam started. I guess there’s no escaping the chateau after all, is there....

 

[lyna]

Not Stephending, but for 15 of those years there was a limited budget to tackle the issues. But there certainly was time to come up with a master plan and to set some priorities in a logical order.

Yes, of course, no budget, but loads of money to visit nearly two dozen countries in one year, visit Paris to buy Cire Trudon candles, visit the south to buy Souleiado...

I think my disgust with her vlogs was sparked when one of the volunteers (really tall guy with dreadlocks) was cleaning out the barn.
16 years of loaded into one space.
If she had taken a side trip to the decheterie, on her way to the airport//train station, and unloaded ten items that did not give her joy, that space would have been cleaned out in a year...

 

[MojoDublin]

Freddie Fox, goes on a chicken hunt.
Bertie Boar narrates his own laland vlog...he got fed up of Philip's snorts putting off the wildlife.
Roger Rabbit- escapes the pot! Illustrated by that well known artist Michael Petherick.
The Farmers dog, comes to play as she steals a chicken and runs away.
Harry Hedeghog realises he is not the only prick at laland.

Ok I peed …


Title thread suggestion
Author @Gibson

Harry hedgehog Not the only prick at lalande

 

[mrsp67]

A question I’ve always had? I am a middle class maybe upper middle class American. I came from a pretty mid-level family and I never have ever thought to buy $8000 fabric or fancy wallpaper. I guess I always believe wallpaper was wallpaper. And perhaps some of you that are European maybe have more style than I do. But if I had much needed repairs in bathrooms and plumbing and heating I for one would fix all those things and buy $50 fabric and plain old wallpaper from my local hardware store. Am I just too middle class or was SJ raised on the very very fine things in life.

I’m so glad that I found on this site! And that I’m not the only one that thinks DJs artwork is atrocious and has no place in the Château.

 

[MarquisOfNadaillac]

From latest gift grab..