The Chateau Diaries #40 Vampire of the vanities, the grifters return

[Heathcliffe]

OK, I'm doing a poll, lets bet everyone! Tattle turns Vegas! If you think Phillip is just Stephanies servant and platonic companion and possibly gay, you put this face underneath But if you think they are having sex, love, or both you put my favourite, underneath. I am going for green myself.

Without getting too personal, could you dwell in a femmeish bedroom?
Pink walls?
Flowered wallpaper or curtains or bed curtains?
Curly French furniture and crown canopies?
Are there femme touches, or styles of flowery soft furnishings, you like? (For example, English style rose chintz well pleated into bed curtains?)

I can, for a period of time, say in a hotel or B&B absolutely apreciate a bit of rose chintz of the classy sort. I would also say that our bedroom at home is more feminine than masculine, but in a stylish way...not twee. I must compliment my woman on this, I have taken for granted the way she never upsets me with her decor, I found that bed and toile really offensive poor Phillip. I'd be too annoyed to get it up in that.

 

[Mummy Dearest]

hello my lovelies, in case noone posted this yet, enjoy

Just popping out from MIA status because this was too funny not to comment on...

I almost fell out of my chair as I choked on my Diet Coke “Stephanie Jarvis, a very famous YouTuber” girl, please! Having 130-some thousand subs doesn‘t make you famous. No one outside of the chateausphere would have a clue who she is.

I wanted to feel bad for her as she reminisced about cooking for 14, each with a different food intolerance, allergy, diet restriction, all the way down to throwing tantrums if their food touches each other on the plate, (probably an exaggeration but somehow I can see BJJ doing this). On the flip side, know what you’re getting into before volunteering yourself for God knows what. How shocking that LaLaLanders wouldn’t take advantage of free labor and weaseling their way out of a cooking a meal, no one in that place is chomping at the bit to cook for 14 picky eaters.

Did they walk in the door, greeted by Nati with, “Hello, welcome to LaLande. Today you will playing the part of volunteer short order cooks. Here are your floral aprons and complementary shackles so we can chain you to the stove. You will be equipped with an Ipad with one app - Pinterest. You’ll have 10 minutes of recipe planning time. You need to prepare three dishes to accommodate vegans, gluten-free, paleo, keto, nut allergies, dairy allergies, egg allergies, water allergies, it needs to be color coordinated, combining various textures, and span three different continents. It will be expected that you already know where the China, flatware, and linens are to set a full table even though you’ve never been here before, we assume that you watch the vlogs and can navigate our food pantry and storage area from memory. We dine in two hours. If anyone dies of anaphylaxis, you’ll be chopped and marooned to the attic of bat guano for the duration of your stay. May the odds be ever in your favor”.

 

[MsPitstop]

hello my lovelies, in case noone posted this yet, enjoy

I originally thought, via a live chat, that they were based in the South Island of NZ. But nope, they are half an hour away from where I live. Shall I pop in and get the goss from them about the chaos that is LaLaLand?

 

[Marquis de Potpourri]

"In the past, everything was quite tight. Money was so tight. I didn't know if I would be able to replace things if they broke." - SJ

Recommended 12-Step Program for Steph:
1. Clear out the chateau of all your garbage.
2. Be sure to dump all the garbage out. Do not keep anything! I repeat, do not keep anything.
3. Stop going to any furniture store, brocante, or on Amazon.
4. Stop Cadeaux at the Chateau! Unless you do, you will keep collecting garbage from all over the world!
5. Hire a structural engineer to assess the status of your chateau.
6. Make necessary structural, roofing, flooring, plumbing, heating repairs first. Real beauty and strength come from within--that's true especially with buildings.
7. Hire an interior designer. Face the fact that you are not that talented and your taste sucks. That's why you have so much garbage in the first place.
8. Give yourself a realistic timeline to finish all projects (while the money is pouring in generously before your patrons snap out of their insanity).
9. Listen to what the interior designer says. Do not deviate!
10. Purchase only the things he/she tells you to. While we're at it, let someone else do all the purchasing for you. You cannot be trusted with your own money.
11. Let the interior designer do her/his job. Do not meddle. Remember, your taste sucks. Repeat after me: "My---taste---sucks---."
12. When all the work is done, cancel your Patreon account. Stop inventing new things to do and projects to pursue. Stop the money grab. Live off of YouTube money and B&B income. You will no longer have a pandemic to use as an excuse. You'll have peace of mind and be able to sleep better if you do, knowing you're no longer using and abusing other people for financial gain.

 

[Clara Burnett]

A very boring video of SJ cleaning out her attic, only to be followed by her receiving dozens of unsolicited gifts from Davy... she is the textbook definition of a hoarder and the shitoo will NEVER actually be clean or organized.

It’s becoming hilarious and tragic all in one: she learned from us that in order to be taken serious as a shittoo owner she needs to declutter, so low and behold where does she start? And then she uses a whole cupboard to store the playmobil? A madhouse on fire, with no water in sight to help tame the flames.

Wait, the sheep belong to Jarvis??? I assumed a farmer was running them on her land to keep the grass down. Why would she own livestock when she has zero interest in them?

She bought the first couple as a present for the not so elusive Nic, apparently they are ‘his favorite’ (so much so, that he doesn’t even feed them himself when he is at the shitshow). The inbred that expanded them into the group they now have, was only stopped after my friends took care of the males by bringing them to the vet. Up until the last minute begore that happened SJ pleaded to keep at least one male ‘intact‘, because she loved having lams each year, so cute. Ornamental is too good a word for how she views animals, I tell you.

 

[lyna]

That is impressive research and impressive grift. Thank you.

LOL well at one time I was a CD fan. LOVED it!! And then things started to nag, then my last Italian nerve was hit when the rest of us were home quarantining and she posted her vlog while she was sailing the Mekong... Also at about the same time I watched a zoom hosted by a school family who fosters children. They save ALL year to take their ONE vacation a year to Disneyland with the foster kids...

Yup in the real world some people only get one vacay... I can't complain we take bang up vacays but I am not so thick skinned and flip to be blind to the fact that others don't have the same opportunity. Well, I also don't complain about not having money for food...

So after she made yet another comment about not having money, I counted up SJ's vacays and realized I was getting hood winked, and wasting my life watching her live her life...

Whilst dramatic events were engulfing Europe and changing the way of life there beyond recognition, Scotman and I were blissfully floating up the Mekong in Vietnam and Cambodia.

That tagline smacked too much of entitlement and let everyone else go to hell in a hand basket while I'm having fun...

All my children were distance learning, kids home from school and college <---- and obliged to pay the remaining leases on two empty apartments a grand total of nearly $20,000... Granny sequestered in her house, isolated and lonely, because she's old and frail... Too scared to put out the garbage because she doesn't know what the heck the world is turning into...

And here is Miss Thing having fun on yet another vacay...

I wonder if people ever realize how their comments can come across...

Oh and add Cambodia to that list!

 

[emilyseyo]

There's something extremely off-putting about people who respond to even the mildest criticism with "if you don't like it don't watch" (/read/listen/participate/whatever). Because most of the time these are not trolls who randomly chose to make your life difficult today; they are or were fans who do like what you're making, and want to keep liking it. But they see problem areas and are trying to be helpful. Plus if one person says it, there is almost guaranteed to be a line of people behind them who just hadn't figured out how to say it, or didn't want to rock the boat or be jumped on by the superfans for criticizing their darlings.

It's also disingenuous to say "everyone is equal, patrons just get a teeeensy bit extra" when the opportunities to get attention or interaction by paying more are dangled in front of you at every turn.

I don't know how much the patreon chateau quiz debacle got discussed on here, but as a lower-tier patron it was very insulting how many people reacted to anybody saying they felt left out by lecturing the $5 patrons on how we too could give more if we just "learned to budget" or "planned better". (None of that was coming from Stephanie, I should say, it was all fellow patrons, but there was a definite feeling of "it's so annoying having to deal with these POOR PEOPLE trying to be part of our fun" and that aspect of it was never part of the apology/explanation video that got posted later.)

 

[FrenchGirl123]

Is Cat paid by Lalande now ? Or is she a "volunteer" ? Otherwise why would she do all this work for a BnB she doesn't run and won't make any profit from ?

Selmar : Is it me or, in their latest video, his mood is completely different to what it used to be in previous CD vlogs ? As if he was already "elsewhere", not laughing or even smiling at the Chatelaine jokes/compliments etc ? Not interested anymore in Lalande saga. Weird vibes.

As for their dinner at the end of the video... OMG what a sad and not-so-relax mood ! Have you noticed Marie W. 's face when she thought she was not filmed, eating her dish ? And the odd couple, Steve and Sara ? Not to mention the new volunteer, Fanny 2...

I get the feeling that if Stephanie is not with them, all these people have strictly nothing in common and nothing to share...

 

[Marquis de Potpourri]

Coming soon on The Chateau Diaries' Sunday at the Chateau.

Join us for an adventure with Stephanie as she travels to the Netherlands and encounters BJJ's family for the first time, and will most likely be introduced as his significant other. That'll be interesting.

She will also take us on a side trip to Belgium to visit Castle Ten Berghe, and stop on her way to meet Davey's parents to thank them for the antique things she got from them.

 

[Jikki2]

Not Stephending, but for 15 of those years there was a limited budget to tackle the issues. But there certainly was time to come up with a master plan and to set some priorities in a logical order.

It has been pointed out many times before but she had the budget to travel to London once a month and Venice every year and who knows how many other destinations. She also hoarded tons of crap. She has never been poor but her pile of stones in the middle of nowhere just wasn't her priority until the place started to earn her massive piles of cash.

 

[MarquisOfNadaillac]

Right! Avignon with Hanni and Mummy last year. Bordeaux recently. Chateau de la Basmaignee last year for a live YouTube chat with MPK (when he needed $ for a laptop.)

With that and MPK to "Peter Rabbit Land" in the UK, Madrid for 2 months and his Lalande trips - you'd never know we had a quarantine and pandemic. Poor things were so bottled up at home and needed breaks away. Welcome to the club...but we stayed home, unlike you!

Avignon, Bordeaux, Honfleur (Fleuries), Baismaignee, Italy with Oliver, La Gorce, Chateau de Brives, Domaine de Chalaniat, Priory of Notre Dame d'Orsan, Amy & Marc's, Marqueyssac, Sarlat, Bourges, Vic, Bruges.

I'm sure there is more but I can't be bothered - 14 is plenty, y'all get the idea.

 

[Heathcliffe]

Results are in... 32 (believe S & P are lovers) and 17 do not believe they are. Hm...interesting. They are giving off many clues and vibes, but are we interpreting this right? I believe we are. I agree with French Girl 123 that Selmar is acting totally different in vlogs now. He seems deflated, deluded and less animated. Could be that he was shocked to find that Snorts got the Chatelaine Stephanie, or it could be that he is disappointed with the way his patreon is going etc...the fairytale has burst. He is interacting different with Stephanie, could be for these reasons, and also that he now has a different love interest himself, if this Tatyana person is still around. He was the king of Lalande for a short minute, now they don't need him.

 

[Heathcliffe]

I use them only when you mention SJ and Snorts in the sheets. That is a pukey face for those 2 lovebirds....not you! Lol

I collect vomit emojis now,- I know they are not for me as a person honey, bring them on!!! Just imagine Snorts pausing his muff diving, peaking up between those lovely thighs and saying "was that ok?" looking her intently in the eyes. "Yes, perfect!" she exclaims, and he dives in again with a big snort. Now bring on the green faces!!!

 

[FrenchGirl123]

OUCH !

From their latest (boring) CD vlog :

NB :
Cat has become like them : playing the nice girl (her role in this comedy) and making the same Awww ! and Ohhh ! as them. The scene when they were reunited with Natti was ridiculous as was the scene in the attic with the Chatelaine childhood "souvenirs" (for the video of course).

It's contagious...



Claudine Retif
4 hours ago
"Badly Done Stephanie. Badly done indeed!" I was again offended by your Patreon plug while opening Davey's gifts. It was like: "Here's a teaser for all you nobodies but the posh get to see the whole show. Why waste such fine porcelain on the vulgar, poor, masses." Likewise, an episode or so ago, Ian, Davey, Philip, and you were discussing building plans. The great unwashed got a taste, then cut to the Patreons for the rest of the tour. Odious! I was actually considering getting a small Patreon subscription for my sister because she always feels so small whenever she gets cut out. Alas, now I will not get the account because it would seem like rewarding crash behaviour. Did some Youtube genius tell you to plug Patreon this way?? Remember, you gained 100,000 subscribers being rather ordinary and down to earth. You always took great pains to make even your humblest viewer feel like part of the team merely because they watched all the adverts and "liked" you. Now your getting spoiled! One more point, at the beginning of this episode you said you wanted to have a more professionally decorated / organized chateau. I'm all for order but. . . Why watch your chateau if yours just like everyone elses - antiseptic? Seems to have lost your common touch?! Hopefully someone can talk some kindness and humility back into you before it is too late. You're too good for this! We need the grateful for small things, lockdown Stephanie back.
Show less






REPLY

 

[Pno]

I think the issue is that she has been saying it's only because of the money coming in now that she's able to do any of the work and that simply isn't true. She begs for money under false pretences and people living in relative poverty fall for it. She could have been organized and have work done in the decade and a half with her army of friends and volunteers but she chose not to. She had the right to choose not to fix up the place but she's pretending like it wasn't a choice and that is not ok.

The first time money rolled in SJ replied that she and her mother now would be able to eat which implies they were not able to buy essentials due to their impoverished circumstances. Mind you besides owning 50% of Lalande she owns an income generating flat in London and her mother owns large homes in the UK and SA and at least part of a chateau in the south of France. Oh and SJ has never held down a job other than shopping, partying, international travel, not running the BnB very well and failing to keep up with its upkeep, and abusing the Work Away system.

I have not seen her beg for money. Granted I do not watch every vlog, I have heard her saying about extra content for patrons.

Those people that “live in relative poverty“, it’s their choice to send money to her. No one is forcing the 3000 plus patrons to send money.

SJ begs non-stop! She mentions a Spode pattern and et voila she is swimming in it. The worst and most disgusting was the Nativity figurines. She made sure to give the exact size that she wanted and handmade in Italy of course. This after saying she had never owned one and that they chateau never had one. Of course the Tattlers found photographic evidence of the Ghosts of Christmas Past that showcased Nativity scenes that eggads! were not handmade in Italy.

 

[Marten]

From "Step inside a perfectly decorated French chateau".

 

[Heathcliffe]

Here is the explanation. These vloggers definitively take advantage of vulnerable people : From MPK latest vlog :


M Parker
7 hours ago (edited)
@ Nannie G I appreciate your point of view, but to those of us whom gift giving is their love languages, the Cadauex Vlogs really, really REALLY brighten our days. I can't tell you how many times I've had a long day or a depressing time and after I watch Cadauex I come away so cheered up and inspired and ready to take on life again, and I know I'm not the only one who feels that way. I know there are those that mention the gifts make them uncomfortable, and I appreciate that they honestly feel that way, but truthfully that puzzles me. I can't quite understand how the joy of giving and getting gifts makes people uncomfortable , it truly confuses me. But I'm glad that those who are uncomfortable can unsubscribe, and hopefully such channels can keep going for those of us who take away such a ray of light from them. If gifts aren't for Michael, I certainly want to respect his boundaries for sure!!! But I really hope Cadauex continues! If it slows down even I don't mind, but I hope it doesn't go away. And then everyone has their boundaries respected and also their joy tanks filled. As far as trying to figure out what to do with it all, THAT I understand! I have often thought that it could get out of control trying to find space for stuff in Michael's small cottage!!
Show less

REPLY

If people MUST give (a gift is creating a bond, it means there is a link, an obligation, feelings involved, a common future) gifts to idle Mr. Trotter, why not make a room in Gwendoline's Chateau into a Beatrix Potter museum, - it would be fun for visitors I am sure. When high on his party drugs, Trotter could dress up as Peter Rabbit and jump out and do a little performance. Stephanie has a "use" for the nicer gifts she receives, she has a big place to fill. Trotter has a small borrowed cottage that he would rather not clutter up with junk. I bet he bitches about the crap he receives when the camera is off, he has a really bitchy side to him and is in this for money. Easy money, fast money. He does not really want to buy paint "with his own money!" naturally! It is like a kid bragging that he bought something with his pocket money from his dad. My son gets told to not brag or play the big man, it is not admirable to brag about spending your dad's money. The day he earns himself, fine, but whilst he is living the highlife on my earnings I want him to be honest about it, not pretend it is his own making. I cannot stand rich kids wanting credit for being entrepreneurs when they were born with silver spoons in their mouth. Rant over!

 

[Marten]

Talking about all these chateaus/big houses owners: it is all happy family in front of the camera but it is obvious that all have their personal interests. These people are not friends. They are people concerned with their own agenda – each of them (including the Lalande volunteers). They show interest in each other to gain trust and then pursue their own needs. They are not genuinely interested in each other.

They are not stupid; in fact they are not fooling each other.

Some like Marie want empathy and compassion all the time and are quite manipulative. Before her naive fans know it, she has them sacrificing their needs in order to assist hers. These types of people are draining. It is not sage wisdom about being stronger or ways to move toward happiness she wants to be offered to. We know that. Money! Money!

 

[Parrfect Porcelane]

Let's see how long this comment stays.

 

[chillijam]

Even if I am a rather strict planner, and likes things to be in order, there are always things that have to wait, things that gets delayed because other issues arise or you suddenly get a better idea, materials you end up waiting six extra months for.

You are either very sweet or very blind.

Excuses for an extra six months?

Sure!

BUT

Try SIXTEEN FRIGGIN YEARS!!

Sorry, but the excuses ran out about a decade and a half ago.

The lack of work, lack of planning, lack of anything of any substance, inside or outside, is showing. No heating. No proper hot water. No insulation. All we see is ruin, clutter, junk, more clutter, and bad decisions. And appalling artwork.