The Chateau Diaries #307 Stephanie Jarvis, how do other châteaux progress but yours does not?!

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God that kush room looks horrid
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Honestly, I'd also wear that shirt for a casual. But not for dinner. And despite Snorts' levels of testosterone probably being lower than mine he does not compliment the feminine shirt.

There are times when I think the hags jump the shark here but time and time again they prove me wrong. Trust the Tattle hags, they're amazing sleuths and have called the Phiphi relationship, the death of the chickens and probably many others. I wouldn't be surprised if what's been said here regarding the circumstances of the tragic death of the contractor ends up being true also.

It also seems that despite the controversy around Tattle's Voldermort, Clara, she has also given us pretty solid information along the years. Whoever he or she is, she truly was in the "inner circle" at some point.
 
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What in the entire world is THIS look now?
Nothing but a tacky tasteless linen-clad parasite

He looks like gay Charles Manson at a luau wearing an adult diaper !

Are there no full length mirrors at the dump?!
Much has been commented on Snorty's new summer stylings. But shockingly he is more on trend than one might expect. He His linen ensemble would fit right in at the Chelsea Flower Show.

WWD has a best dressed at the CFS feature and actor Josh O'Connor makes the list. Change the trainers to red, open a button, and add hair extensions, granny rings, a French tuck, and a Chateau Love tote, and the two could be twins!


 
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God, he looks ill! And so wrinkly for someone in his 20s! He is younger than I am but living among mold, damp and god knows how many other hazards will take its toll.
 
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Angel Strawbridge's collection started off with the wallpaper design (let's not go there) but it ended up on all sorts. Anna may be on the right road.
Yes Angel ended up in Argos, Me Thinks Anna is higher end fashionable than that, her past at Balmain may open doors ??
 
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Yes Angel ended up in Argos, Me Thinks Anna is higher end fashionable than that, her past at Balmain may open doors ??
Angel has no design background and no idea definitely low end. I think Anna may work with Barnaby and Gates
 
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I think Ratso has become a bitey aggressive dog ....... he has finished with the chickens - on to the peacocks and hopefully he will get himself inside Fannys $$ wardrobe and finish off all her expensive dresses and shoes.
Unfortunately, Fanny doesn't have any respect for her wardrobe, easy come, easy go. She will just continue to buy, buy, buy. It's so revolting. I hope in her next life she is reduced to being a third world garbage heap scavenger. That would be the appropriate and natural karma. Apologies if the attached photo is upsetting, but this is the reality of first world excessive consumerism and waste. Fanny is a major contributor.
 

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Stephanie has visited Africa regularly and the result of the Wests consumption is there to see, all our fridges and other electrical goods make it to third world countries and the continent of Africa takes a lot. She will also see it washing up on the beach near her Mum's house. Fanny doesn't care though it is all about her.
 
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Just goes to show you that even WWD gets it wrong sometimes!
 
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Getting to know each other? How long has she had that dog?
 
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Steptoe and Son was the inspiration for Sanford and Son over here. An enormous amount of our tv programming was inspired by or outright stolen from UK telly.
Well, in return, the UK has copied a lot of US traditions, such as Halloween trick or treating, and now lots of people in shops, etc., say "Have a nice day" to customers. We used to be too grumpy to do or say things like that. Mind you, I still get grumpy if a shop assistant asks me what I am going to do with my afternoon when they haven't the slightest interest in the matter and I am probably not going to do anything very interesting anyway. If they call me "dear" or "darling", they are putting themselves at great risk!
 
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People also answer when someone says "how are you?" with "I'm good" my Mum always said "who was asking about your behaviour" LOL. Also schools now have proms
 
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Are Thrush's drawstring, linen pants from the same collection as his duck shit brown linen playsuit, short ensemble? Or, are they the before he cut them down version. His clothes sense, like everything about him, is shite.

And let me get this right...

Up in the eaves, in the attic bedrooms, we not only have the VAGINA room, but they have now added a DOPE DEN! Would anyone like to suggest what the next theme will be...
 
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It's part of the old clapped out French garniture tradition taken way too far by hardworking chefs with no taste. Melon sculpture. Pièces montées made out of sugar.
I need to add I think this is hotel school cheffing, the culinary school of Marriott Hilton and the U.S. Army. Commercial cheffing has many virtues, not least entry level jobs for immigrants and a slightly less racist and sexist hierarchy than other industries.
Still, no excuse.
I've never been to chef school, but I suspect this aesthetic rules there. With good reason, if you're training people to get jobs where available. But it's all paraffin in the chocolate as far as I can make out.
The other thing about the concept of a bouquet salad is that each ingredient, each stalk, leaf, frond, would need to be primo and complimentary. And presenting one's cheapskate anorexic prunings and dead headings from Fanny's unwatered garden as primo really is derisory fascist spectacle.
 
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Just goes to show you that even WWD gets it wrong sometimes!
Just like Christie’, tastemaker my arse, just look at their last room with the Maryjane wallpaper, blue trim everywhere etc, I don think Christie’s ever recovered asking these nincompoops to design sets around auction pieces
 
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I have to interject... Halloween actually originated in Ireland.

I love the room nicknames. We are great at nicknaming Street art here in Dublin Ireland.
Molly Malone statue is The Tart with the Cart'
The millennium countdown clock in the river Liffey was the chime in the slime.
The Annliffey statue (reclining lady in fountain). The floozy in the jacuzzi or the whore in the sewer. (Pronounced who r)
Spire (basically a tall needle column) The nail in the pale or the stiffy by the Liffey.
Two ladies sitting chatting with well known store bags alongside. The hags with the bags.
Our latest yet to be formally nicknamed is a portal video link direct to the flat iron area in NY.
 
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Gahden greetings from Chelsea!
Wahdrobe selected by Phillip, then a morning constitutional followed by a spot of tea, the pahfect way to staht the day!
We're off to stroll the gahdens of Chelsea. To the envy of onlookers, we received a complimentary upgrade and skipped the queue!
The scent of lilac and primrose filled the air and a serenade of bahdsong welcomed us into this idyllic, privileged botanical paradise.
As we meandered the gently winding paths, we reminisced the halcyon pahst whilst curating the sanguine futcha. Life is good!
 
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I was gobsmacked to see him following Snorts & Fanny around like a child. He's a man with a business of his own, supposedly married with a home and children... why the fork is he hanging around waiting to be told what to do, clearly Snorts won't dare look at him and he won't look at Snorts... What a humiliating turn of events... just leave Grant! Take your daughter and if money's the issue, change the date on your ticket! He's beginning to take on the depressed Marie vibe.
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I'm a little bored tonight!
Stepping away from the 'puter now!
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It's the Christmas miracle...
 
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