What is that saying, “money talks, wealth whispers.” Here are some of my experiences with this concept:
When I was in college, I worked a couple of summers at an exclusive country club to earn money for the upcoming school year ( like about 55+ hours a week , I ended up pretty much living there during those summers, filling in to work in several positions across the property). Being around and observing so many monied families in an insular setting was eye opening.
Warning: these are broad generalizations and there are certainly exceptions to what I am writing her so please do not take offense.
I noticed that in general, the people from families with generations of wealth were comfortable with themselves, didn’t follow the trends, drove older cars, and were low key (there are always exceptions to this, of course… there were some old money people that were obnoxious jerks, and flaunted themselves). If you met any of these people in the local community they wouldn’t stand out or expect any special treatment.
In the new money crew, in general, there were several wives that routinely and conspicuously wore lots of flashy jewelry, new trendy expensive clothing, drove the latest highest end Range Rover, had to loudly discuss their upcoming vacations at the trendiest new in locations, the latest trainer, show off their latest luxury watch, etc. ( there were people with the new money that were fine and low key) .Some of the new money husbands would loudly brag about their latest expensive golf clubs and were always maneuvering to get into a golfing foursome with an influential club member.
They would hold weekly luncheons after tennis matches ( ironically with several of them wearing diamond tennis bracelets and Cartier bracelets stacked on their arms)and would gift each other $200 picture frames, expensive candles, spa gift certificates, etc. while many of them would be eying each other to figure out who had the latest cosmetic procedure or gossiping about who was sleeping with whom and who as rumored to getting a divorce, etc. It was a superficial cut throat environment with these ladies.
I learned a lot about the functional and dysfunctional dynamics of money and how it can affect people during those couple of summers.
When I got out of graduate school, I worked for several years for a man who had become very successful and was easily in the top 1% of earners in the state. He was an absolute cheap jerk to anyone who was not in his coveted monied social circle in which he desperately wanted to be a major player. Over the last 30+ years, he made it and is now considered an old school elite member of this group of people who attend the latest charity balls, vacation at the priciest in “dude ranch”, etc.
I observed him and his wife clawing their way up the social ladder for decades. They were worried about winning the “prettiest table” award at events, he resentfully overpaid for crappy auction items to show their “status” and to obtain invitations to certain social events, disingenuously kissed the ass of every person they thought could help them achieve their social goals only to swiftly dump them if they divorced or encountered financial hard times, and added a special wing to their house to host soirees.They were incredibly worried about outer appearances ( e.g., he leased a jaguar for their maid to drive his kids to and from their local private school) etc.
He would only help someone or make donations to charities if he got a plaque or a mention in the society page ( while behind the scenes he was scrimping on paying employees and complaining about price of writing pens going up by .50 cents). He framed and displayed photos of himself with any and every celebrity/high level society person, governor/ United States president. Incredibly shallow existence.
Once after I had earned him over $600,000 profit on a particular business situation that he thought he was going to lose his shirt on, he magnanimously told me that he was going to give me a $5,000 bonus for all my “hard work.” As he was writing out the check for his “grand gesture,” he commented that he didn’t know how he was going to be able to afford to give me the check for $5,000 (implying it was such a great burden), I noticed the next check he had waiting to be signed was for $10,000 made payable to his wife so she could purchase a new $10,000 gown for the latest disease ball gala that they were attending.
It took another couple of years, but I was so glad to quit that job. True to form, he pretty much screwed me on many career prospects thru his prominence in the the good ole boy network, and he made it to the top of the professional field, surrounded by transactional, superficial, money hungry, and self congratulatory wanna bes. I knew who he really was and he hated that. In the end, it was a big lesson I learned about money and how the love of money can really affect every part of how some people operate and you have to decide if you want to be on that ride. I did not.
As I assume is likely with most of the Tattlers in this forum, F4F ‘s grifting and posturing brings up so many issues concerning money and the love of money that we see in people we know and society in general.
Okay, rant over. Sorry to take up so much space with this rant.
How many f’in sets of lights?! How much consumption for two people in one small barn? Thank the Lord they are going to France soon and taking their obscene consumption and need for excess with them.
