The Chateau Diaries #157 You'll never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy, caution is advised!

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Excuse moi that would be Dauphene Jason Dubey to you, and well us and anyone who didn’t ask…
 
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While I am a great admirer and notice-taker of Clara's wet work -- and her silences -- there's no way Tina would be sashaying through the shitoo as recently as Clara has been. I worry Clara exposes herself too much here to start with, so I won't be giving examples of why I think it's impossible that she is Ian or Tina. Speculation about her identity is something I avoid. I don't need to know, just to scratch my tattlin' itch. And the price of disclosure would be losing an invaluable eyewitness. I once told the company lawyer I'd go to prison rather than reveal a source. He said, The Women's Detention Center is not a nice place. I said, It's just another story.
 
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Wow. The caterwauling. Miserable. Kill me.
“Dear Patrons,

WE NEED YOU TO DOUBLE YOUR DONATIONS SO WE CAN BE WARM, ESPECIALLY MUMMY AND PERCY WHEN THEY VISIT. IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO MAKE LALANDE BENEFICIARY OF YOUR WILLS PLEASE CONTACT NUTTI@CHATEAULLGRABEAUX.COM. WE WOULD BE THRILLED TO RELIEVE YOU OF AS MUCH OF YOUR MONEY AS POSSIBLE. THAT WOULD BE PARRRFFFECT!!!”
 
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“working the street for money” same as a prostitute.

it seemed to me that the entire convo with Amaury was designed to increase Patreon donations. “If this YouTube, Patreon thing ends.” “Best to do the entire heating job in one hit” etc.

There will be some new Patreon tiers in the near future…donations will go into a special heating account. These tiers will be attached to a promise of not only having your (potential new patrons) name recorded on the back of some panelling, but also tattooed on Fanny’s busy arse.

“Dan,” who has pointed out some truths on the YT comments, created a stir. Burn Fanny. Maintain the rage “Dan.”

Not a sensible bone or boner in her body!
 
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maybe it was filed- in her inbox of 9000 plus emails - I would bet that she just found it having cleared the inbox. Either that or it was the lake application
e-mail # 3 is from the water police: Dear Ms. Jarvis and Bad head. It has come to our attention that your lake is compliant and you do not, I repeat it does not need to be drained. Please disregard any prior notices. Sincere apologies.
 
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Or it is just a lie and Amoury's friend gives a high quote in an attempt to put the heating to bed as unachievable

Where does Fanny get her botox done so regularly?
She probably had it done at the mechanics when she took the van

December is Double your Donation Month folks... Pre-payment is acceptable..
 
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For your kind donation, Dear Patron, so you too can have your name engraved on our new boiler.

Yes, I know I could stay warm if I slept with Snorty and we cuddled together - but frankly I'd rather freeze to death than share a bed with PhiPhi.

Snorty says he could stay warm if I got him a puppy to sleep with a night - but frankly I'd rather Snorty freeze to death than get a dog.

We could sleep under our new chandeliers, but I'm surprised they don't give off much heat.

The new van isn't good for sleeping because it's covered in peacock poo, but the good news is we can use peacock poo pellets in our new boiler.

We thought about sleeping downstairs in front of a warm fire (like a big, fun Lie Lande Slumber Party), but Snorty's hair is a fire hazard and he might roll too close to the embers while sleeping. I don't have the insurance for that - in fact, I can't remember, but I don't think I've paid any insurance for a while. I think there was something about insurance premiums in my 9,000 emails, but in my recent, exciting clean up I think I may have deleted those notices - silly me!

So yes, a new boiler is best, but only with your kind donations, dear patrons.
 
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E-mail # 8749 from Snorty’s college: Dear Mr. Jansen, We are excited to have you return to college for your sophomore year. We hope your gap year was rewarding and matured your decision making. We are excited for the education and life experiences you will gain to prepare you for adulthood. We have not yet received your tuition check for room and board nor have we gotten your decision on if you want a male or female dorm.
 
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I think she's given up too. Where's the Ollie travelogs? In the same never-neverland as the rest of the 9,000 projects. Stacked up in her inbox.
Only content left is the executions of Dan and Pheeph.
Maybe that's what all the wooden structures in the front courtyard and garden are for. Execution of the masses - so Lie Lande!
 
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E-mail 7284 from toxin lab: ALERT please be advised the soil sample you sent us from the courtyard is a biohazard. Are you sure this was not sent from a sewer plant? Remove any cats, refugees or men who wear toe socks immediately. Symptoms of concern: hair thinning, fear of bathing or may become allergic to citrus.
 
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Jason Dubey is a super fan who is a high level patron. He lives in California where he owns the American River Inn. https://americanriverinn.com/
He also owns Genius Fine Art in Lake Tahoe where he sells replica art work. www.geniusfineart.com He's obsessed with Fanny and Lie Lande and joins and dominates the weekly, live chats.

He recently travelled to Europe and stayed at the shiteau, but Fanny and most of the Lie Landers were away (likely intentional), and the place was a ghost town. Dauphin Dubey stayed 2 nights, wandered the lonely grounds and Dan was delegated to welcome him. Dubey left the gift of a big rose bush (in picture), which Fanny hasn't been polite enough to even mention or thank him for publicly.

Yes, Jason's delusional giving USD1,200 a year in donations, especially since Fanny can't be bothered to meet him or thank him for his gift.
 

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