The Chateau Diaries #107 IJ. my legs are more beautiful, SJ ah yes but mine can open further

[shaken&stirred]

When I think of PJ and SJ in the sack, I imagine Connie and Raymond Marble's sex scene in Pink Flamingos. My skin crawls too!View attachment 994338

The only way the bone dance is going to happen between SJ and Snorts is if Snorts trips while naked and wearing SJ’s and lands just right. Then they call Nati in to jump on the bed for some motion. In reality, they’d probably call Dan.

Reasons this is plausi
SJ never wears panties
Yes, I read something about “soaking” in a certain religious sect

Before thinking that’s just crazy, consider the alternative. There are no sparks between them.

 

[Lady Avonlea]

Spero mentions Stephanie is coming to SA this year ....

Am I bad for hoping Squirrelbaby gets Tick Bite Fever when he’s in SA?

 

[après-le-déluge]

The German couple who live in the UK... "Kirsten and Joerg" is the name of their YouTube channel.

omg now I know who you mean. That Kristen gives me the creeps. I had to unsubscribe to their channel. They were both too icky

 

[Hemerocallis]

Tolhuín looks like the literal end of the earth. If I were from there I'd call myself Billyviajera too on IG and never go back. Dang.

A bakery is the only attraction

 

[Marty McFly 9]

From under Curtis' apron vlog that was posted to IJs FB page .... she's not monitoring her own page!

 

[Rory]

Would the post office deliver daily or a couple of times a week? I’m wondering if extra staff or routes now needed. I think we worked out in an earlier thread, based on SJ’s comments of being 6 months behind with gift opening, that there must be around 100 parcels waiting to be opened at any given time. Wonder where are they stored?

 

[KyBourbon]

Would the post office deliver daily or a couple of times a week? I’m wondering if extra staff or routes now needed. I think we worked out in an earlier thread, based on SJ’s comments of being 6 months behind with gift opening, that there must be around 100 parcels waiting to be opened at any given time. Wonder where are they stored?

Meanwhile…desperate people are now raiding train cars in Los Angeles and stealing package contents, throwing empty boxes onto the tracks…

 

[gurutard]

Starved of new material upon which to comment, I turn to a worn-out theme - Philip’s sexuality. Though rare, prissy straight men interested in dainty things do exist. Non-conforming attire and unconventional mannerisms might identify a person as gender fluid or queer (in the reclaimed non-pejorative sense), but not necessarily gay. Physical attraction to men defines a man as gay. Have we seen instances of same-sex attraction from Philip? Granted, heavy-handed vlog editing would eliminate overt proof, but those of us with decent gaydar can read between the lines. All but the clueless or delusional figured Michael Petherick out based on the pretty men he surrounded himself with and the schoolgirl manner in which he acted around them. And don’t forget the young man last summer who nakedly lusted after the shirtless Amoury. To me, Philip acts like an asexual child. I’m open to opposing views. Please point me to proof, though, that Philip digs guys.

I personally dislike the way some people discuss the wearing of feminine clothes, etc because LOTS of men in the current climate, who are straight, are wearing more feminine clothes. Pearl necklaces for men is a pretty 'mainstream' trend for young and trendy men. One of the most popular colors for moderns mens clothing in stores seems to be pink, hell its hard to find a hoodie right now that isn't pink. Regardless, some of the talk comes across as homophobic rather than a dislike towards Philip. And yes, these type of men do exist but not into this extreme. The added traits of the obsession over his long hair, how thin he keeps himself, his dainty mannerisms, the feminine clothes, the jewelry obsession, the obsession with his grandparents, china, silverware, sewing, fabric, etc etc its too much to for a straight man. It is possible but it would be a unicorn. He is likely asexual like someone else pointed out. Either way, the whole thing is bizarro to the max. I HATED when women were fawning over Michael and nobody ever put a stop to it. Michael knew what he was doing, he knew if he came out those dry broads would stop being patrons and sending shite. And guess what...they did. There are some very kind people in Chateau Diaries comments, Donna Davis is practically a saint probably. She is genuinely interested in the restoration aspect etc and understands what Stef talks about but the majority of the people are podunk folks who don't get it and constantly post stupid peacock tit or anything that 'reminds' them of Stef...without understanding there is a huge difference between a country chateau and the lifestyles of 19th century aristocracy.

 

[Sparrowsfart]

Stephanme isn't going to like all the love Dan is receiving - at her expense! Some great comments. So refreshing to see that Dan doesn't delete comments, unlike another vloger we know. TickTock06 was on a roll!

Rosetta Maranos
8 hours ago
While the fancy wallpaper can be fun, I personally love the reminders of the ancient and the “workspaces” nature of the Chateau…the fashionable Ladies and Gentlemen can have their high teas and whatnots, I’m more interested in the craftspeople and householders who kept the joint running!
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TickTock06
7 hours ago
The wallpaper that costs hundreds and sometimes thousands of pounds and it is put up by an amateur that cannot measure and has gaps so bad they all have to be decoupaged or crayoned in. Appalling
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Jennifer Burk
8 hours ago
Imagine how great this place could look if she never came back! How much fun Dan could have fixing all the outside rendering.
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REPLY
mark sayers
7 hours ago
I think the whole of France would breathe a sigh of relief !
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seethevolcane
6 hours ago
Philip will be pissed that he wasnt around to work on the bricks. Dan, you should do "Table Settings" and let Philly handle the brick wall. (That shitoo is a mess, but it's more important to buy dishes and frocks at the local brocante, non?) Please: NO WALLPAPER. --If you catch my drift--.
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REPLY
TickTock06
5 hours ago
Don’t worry. No doubt there are sticker books for safari animals to amuse him atm
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TickTock06
7 hours ago
Dan you have done a brilliant job. It looks so much better than that hideous wallpaper and also it will not date. Well done you. I say get a chateau with Natty and amoury and leave this dump behind

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Troy M
8 hours ago (edited)
Does Stephanie know your doing this….see ya tamorrah
REPLY
TickTock06
7 hours ago
Who cares, the job needed doing and it looks better than it did and it has not cost patrons a fortune in wasted time and wallpaper
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Vino
6 hours ago
I thot SJ and PJ wanted to do the pantry walls...non? It's perfect work for high heels. LOLLY.
REPLY
TickTock06
5 hours ago
And short dresses
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anita okey
9 hours ago
It's going to look fab hope Stephanie likes it and dosent cover over all ur hard work x
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REPLY

TickTock06
7 hours ago
No she’s planning her Venice house now

OK which one of you guys is TickTock06?

 

[Le Comte de Monte Cristo]

I truly love Dan and his family but I am afraid he has gotten a little big in the britches. He seems way more cocky lately

Dan wasnt so cocky when he broke down the digger... he stood there like a child who was caught on taking candy out of the jar...

 

[Kickintheass]

Subtitles can occasionally improve a vlog.
One of Selmar's gifts was from Tati's friend Jill.


Didn't know she knew Jailhouse Jill.

 

[Clara Burnett]

As well as Dan, I bet Ian; Nick "Tree"; the two volunteers, and Matt if he's there, are really getting on with various jobs and must be celebrating the fact that SJ and Snorts are not there sticking a phone in their face several times a day; laughing hysterically and making uninformed comments while they are trying to get work done. They may well achieve more in these few weeks than anything they've managed to do over several years! I hope they've cracked open a bottle of champagne to celebrate. The only drawback is, that when SJ returns, she'll make a list of all the jobs that have been done at this time so she can use it in her patron update!

There's quite a bit of that lovely red Italian wine left over from her relatively quiet Christmas celebrations (still too many, but considering to what she had planned...), boys, why don't you have a go, I'm sure milady would understand.

 

[LaFrancaise123]

Sounds like a cult.



Not really.

She doesn't look well at all. And I'm not speaking of a cold or a flu or Covid.

She's not the same sparkling woman we saw in the first vlogs.

Question : are Dan's Patrons vlogs always like this one ?

 

[JackSpratt]

sorry to say but from every 10 vlogs i see her..8 times she has lost her voice or seems to be sick...i surely dont think that house is good for ones health..

I'm sure I remember her saying on a vlog that when her asthma is bad it affects her voice. Nevertheless, it seems to be quite frequent. I know it's been said over and over we only see a small part of their day and perhaps they just want to keep it private. I just wish we'd see more of Dan getting things done in their house, not the Chateau and not the studio fed up with that.

 

[Clara Burnett]

Nutti IG post...
The relationship is new and she is already going down memory lane??? They do look like a middle aged married couple on vacation.
View attachment 993586

@life_wood_n_food
3 hours ago
Making some space on my phone for our holiday footage and found this little video. Couldn't stop laughing! Amaury took very seriously Stephanie's petition to look after me (The video was made when we started dating) At @chateaudelalande we use to join for movie night or to watch @stephanieejarvis vlog all together #funtimes #chateaulife #lovestory #movienight #chateaudiaries #dreamham #holidays
Chateau de la Lande

View attachment 993654

View attachment 993611 View attachment 993612

I can't help but feeling sorry for Nutty. That poor girl still believes the love bombing of her narc is actually about her, still thinks that her time in the entourage can be labelled as "fun". If only she would know how the Snorting Squirrel CamelToe and his Charlataine talk about her in private. My eyes and ears report quotes like " she will never transcend working class habits" and "such a shame she's so unstable emotionally".

patron update


Julia Cobb
I’m so glad you and Philip are in London and able to do some everyday things. I’ll be so happy when y’all’s toes touch ground in South Africa! I know Percy and Mummy are overjoyed that you and Gerald & of course Philip are coming, too. Really enjoyed hearing Nick a little And how was sour dough pizza? My pizza always has so much meat, veggies & cheese on it the crust you don’t really taste it. Tell Philip I found a setting for 12 of Rose and have reached out for others to help me pay for it. I wish I could afford it all, but it would be my travel & clothing budget for the year Hopefully some others will help.



4d
Stephanie Jarvis
Oh my goodness, that is so kind and thoughtful of you, but please don’t worry! Such a thing would be far too expensive. You can’t imagine the joy you give to me (and everyone at Lalande) just from being a patron. Because of all of you we feel safe, creative and able to put our dreams for the future into action

You feel safe enough to travel first class - during a pandemic ya mean .


Trouble with the post …. Again
No doubt she’ll buy one stamp
Heaps got nothing

Hi Stephanie, I enjoyed your Christmas videos. I just want to mention that I have not received your Thank You card for being a patron. Enjoy your travels...


1

3d
Stephanie Jarvis
Please let me know if it doesn’t arrive in the next couple of weeks - I signed everything up to date before leaving Lalande, and Sabina and Maria were posting them all for me. So it should be with you soon!


1

1d


Dan the VIPS… kudos
Stephanie, just seen that bbc news article that says you are 50 got to say the picture in it looks more 30. I blame Dan and his mowing hope this goes on the revenge list for him!!


1

2d
Paul Holmes

The people using YouTube to pay for their French chateau

How chateaux owners are using advertising revenues from social media posts to earn a living.

www.bbc.co.uk

2d
Stephanie Jarvis
He’s in real trouble

Tick Tock

I am actually delighted to hear that the patron's money is making SJ feel safe and creative, because she makes her biggest mistakes feeling like that. Tick tock indeed!

 

[Hemerocallis]

Not really derailing just a little bit

Here in CH we have had to wait 6 months (!) for the plumber to finally replace a sink with tap, repair the toilet flush and remove a urinal. (We pay our bills on time, that can't be the problem.)
The work has now been done. However, the plumber poured his plaster bucket into the toilet.......result: a blob of plaster is stuck to the ceramic and cannot be removed .
Complaint, worker was just there and has removed the sh....

Remember when I was living in a flat in my twenties. Toilet was clogged, plumber came, has taken out stuff , told me, that I shouldn't throw my sanitary towels into the toilet (which I never ever did but a woman in her twenties is certainly to blame for and never the wrong installation that led to blockages over and over again).

And one of his colleagues pours plaster into the toilet.
Unbelievable smh

 

[ComtesseRose]

My guess is squirrel, perhaps hedgehog?

Wait are we suggesting, that Phyllis' might be trans.... species?!

Genderfluid pansexual doesn't really roll off the tongue, LOL.

"such a shame she's so unstable emotionally".

Saying that to about somebody, who escaped an abusive relationship...
Nutty may be working class. SJ & Phyllis are devoid of class!

 

[Clara Burnett]

@Maple fairy congratulations on VIP status.

@Phoenix Richards-Bingham been thinking and saying this myself. I will be interested to watch in coming weeks. Is his grandfather still around? Didn’t her mother buy a house nearby? I think COVID and variants and impact on borders make you feel the absence of loved ones and the familiar.

I'm in no position to try and change anyone's mind nor do I have that intention, we should all do what we ourselves think best. I do like to point out however that both Dan and Analise have payed jobs to support their family and are already making money with the monetized youtube channel. We have all seen the monstrous effect of having a patreon account on steroids. I personally believe it will ruin their family life and I would not want to be part of that. Just my two cents.

 

[OhIDontKnow...]

I can't help but feeling sorry for Nutty. That poor girl still believes the love bombing of her narc is actually about her, still thinks that her time in the entourage can be labelled as "fun". If only she would know how the Snorting Squirrel CamelToe and his Charlataine talk about her in private. My eyes and ears report quotes like " she will never transcend working class habits" and "such a shame she's so unstable emotionally".


I am actually delighted to hear that the patron's money is making SJ feel safe and creative, because she makes her biggest mistakes feeling like that. Tick tock indeed!

“Working class habits?” . Anne Marie smokes so what the heck do they think that is? Do you have any triple checked background on PHiPhi you can share? Do any of his people have money? Hard to tell because he’s always shopping at the charity shop.

I just have this little nugget to get off my chest. For people to feel superior because they have access to money that they did not themselves earn is just oxymoronic. You should feel less-than in my opinion, because you are not self made. If, however, you take that money and grow it, then fine, but you had an advantage in having access to capital. But to sit on your ass and cash checks on money someone else earned is nothing to feel superior about, unless you’re vapid.

 

[Clara Burnett]

Starved of new material upon which to comment, I turn to a worn-out theme - Philip’s sexuality. Though rare, prissy straight men interested in dainty things do exist. Non-conforming attire and unconventional mannerisms might identify a person as gender fluid or queer (in the reclaimed non-pejorative sense), but not necessarily gay. Physical attraction to men defines a man as gay. Have we seen instances of same-sex attraction from Philip? Granted, heavy-handed vlog editing would eliminate overt proof, but those of us with decent gaydar can read between the lines. All but the clueless or delusional figured Michael Petherick out based on the pretty men he surrounded himself with and the schoolgirl manner in which he acted around them. And don’t forget the young man last summer who nakedly lusted after the shirtless Amoury. To me, Philip acts like an asexual child. I’m open to opposing views. Please point me to proof, though, that Philip digs guys.

From my own observations AND everything my eyes and ears have told me, he certainly isn't gay (yet). He for sure hasn't digged any guys yet, nor do I think he feels any incentive to do so any time soon. So, your comments are spot on, I believe!

Stephanme's fragile ego is shinning brightly through Caroline Gooder's negative comments about Dan.

As far as I can tell, it's not SJ herself but the payed help. Very fitting for SJ to pay an amateur to do a professional job, don't you think?

She is genuinely interested in the restoration aspect etc and understands what Stef talks about but the majority of the people are podunk folks who don't get it and constantly post stupid peacock tit or anything that 'reminds' them of Stef...without understanding there is a huge difference between a country chateau and the lifestyles of 19th century aristocracy.

Such a shame SJ is not genuinely interested in the ones who do understand restoration. Everything she talks about is not to lure in the ones who understand, but the ones that don't because she knows they will never seriously interfere with her plans, that don't involve restoration at all, but making enough money to send on her preferred extravagant lifestyle.