The advice thread for random problems #5

[JoeBloggs]

My neighbour next in terrace, other side, has spent all day drilling various parts of house, from 9am-7pm. I only have a bed and the place has been vibrating so much I’m in agony (and landlords painting, on inventory smashed), finally got out of bed to see they’ve erected outside a massive two storey extension. No permission sought. It’s huge and been built on a very dodgy crumbly wall that decades ago (70s) formed part of the house I live in which collapsed before it being renovated to what it is now. That wall is extremely unstable.

The noisy renovations have cost me my therapy (wait list is MONTHS) so landlord can now call on bailiffs to kick me out. They knew about it but their gardener turned up meaning it couldn’t be done due to noise and bedsit stinking of petrol. Thr next door started.

Excuse my ignorance but why can the landlord now call bailiffs? Have you been served a Section 21 notice and a possession order been granted by the court?

The general rule of thumb is construction work can go ahead from 7:30/8am until 6pm week days. If they have not planning and need it, report this to the local planning office.

 

[becca7721]

Does anyone know when it comes to private housing that if a house decides to get extensions they need to alert the neighbours? Or is it if they get planning permission accepted then they don't need to alert neighbours?

Without giving away too much, a house is getting some large work getting done, we haven't been told or alerted about it, I had aways though neighbours needed to be told but unsure when it comes to private houses what the rules are

The works being going on weeks now with no end in site, it's more the noise, mess an disruption that's starting to annoy me, vans parked inches from my front garden (parking on pavement) an their crap all over the garden plus walking over it which we have treatment down, constantly taken rubbish out my garden as it's blown over, they were cutting wood an it was clouds of this black smoke everywhere, they keep throwing uneaten bits of sandwiches/rolls all over the road at lunch which has now encouraged seagulls to consistently come down now, they constantly park across the driveways as well an block off access to houses with their numerous vans, there's laybys in the street but they won't use them an just leave them abandoned all over the road, but without being told about any of this I dont know how long its to last an really would like a end date

The neighbours are massive assholes and I'd rather not approach them

In my (very) limited experience the neighbours are made aware by council before it being granted. It’s up to them to then put forward objections. That said I was always been the immediate neighbour so the council may not bother for anyone further away.

Last time house next in terrace was done took over eighteen months and that was everyday from exact time in morning to late evening (7:30am pneumatic drilling as example). It was horrendous. If I said anything they’d just mock. Blocked all access, refused to have breaks ‘on site’ so had them in our garden (food/drink cans, even “lads mags” all left in front garden. Was a tip. Not to mention builders materials. It was horrendous. The people that rented it from HA were evicted and the HA didn’t care at all, not even when the builders forgot to put scaffolding up to hold up the building and it nearly tore down the houses each side. It was horrendous. I lived in property alone most of that time because it was so bad.

 

[Snippysnips]

Does anyone use canva an PowerPoint? I need to redo training slides to be a bit more fancier so I've been using canva to do it on, however they need to be downloaded an printed from PowerPoint, I can design an download on canva an even download as a PowerPoint but whenever I open it up on PP all the designs are off the page an the words are overlapping etc, I've tried so many different sizes on canva but still can't seem to fix this, an with 10 PP files to do with over 100 slides each in them I cant really be designing on canva then going on PP an redoing it all

 

[it’s not been changed?!]

Could you get a referral to a dental hospital? Or do they not do that anymore?

I had problems with a dentist missing cavities which were visible on all my X-rays over a year. Ended up needing three root canals.
It cost me €3k. I had a specialist root canal dental surgeon do them.

I understand your upset and anger. It was really stressful and I felt so cheated and mistrustful. It sucks.

Talking of root canals… it looks like I need my first ever one I’ll be getting it on the nhs. If it fails, do I have to pay for the treatment again?! And they told me I’d need a crown as well. I want porcelain as it’s on lower jaw… if the treatment fails after the crown is done, what do I do?! Pay for another crown!!?

 

[Former_Antelopee]

I did mine 8.30am the other day as I wanted to take the cuttings to the tip before it got too busy, and I was second guessing myself the whole time! I wouldn't bat an eyelid at someone doing at it 7pm. Maybe if you didn't even start until after 8pm, but that's just me personally - I don't think it's unreasonable unless you know an immediate neighbour has small children.

Both my next door neighbours are single men and one barely even lives there at the moment anyway. Think there's a few kids down the street but I don't know where they live and there's not many from what I've seen

 

[Snippysnips]

Oyster cards are now redundant. You use your bank card to tap in and out. But you must remember to tap out. There is a set limit of what you will be charged every day.

Thanks, I had no idea, nor does my friend who's going down there, the last time we were down we used a bank card but it ended up in a mess because they don't total the amount of people all together an put it through as one like they do here an they wanted one card per person (they wouldn't tell us this, it was actually passengers that helped us out because for some reason they didn't want to explain that) but we only wanted to use one card for us all so we kept on track of it, has this changed now the oyster cards are gone or still the same?

Preferable I just want to use the one card for all 3 of us as it keeps us on track rather than each of us using one card each an then having 3 cards to constantly check up on

also what do you mean by making sure to "tap out" an how much per day can you use?

 

[it’s not been changed?!]

It might stop them.

I used to ask "doing anything nice?" Thinking I was just being friendly/chatty/nice manager and then one of my team gave me that response and I thought shit, I have been really nosey!! So now I just approve it and pop it on the calendar.

I feel guilty for moaning about it, because I’d like to think it’s because they’re genuinely interested as to why we book time off.
At the back end of last year, I had booked a day off and I was asked why I was taking it off. I just said I had personal stuff to sort out (really I just wanted a break from work) and they still haven’t taken the hint that I don’t want to be asked why. Sometimes I just want to take a days leave.
I never ask why people book time off cos it’s none of my business eg it could be for personal reasons. This person does it cos they’re nosey!

I’ll stop ranting now things could be a lot worse.

 

[OnlyHereForTheLolz]

Bought a simplycook kit to make chicken makhani. However once I started cooking I realised they didn’t send me the paste.
Does anybody know how to make makhani (butter) paste

 

[Kim Mild]

Check with them and if they don’t then ask them to use yours for the trip

I might get a booster cushion and send that. They do have rather small cars. I honestly thinking just don't trust other people. I'm sure it will be fine , the family are more than capable of driving.

 

[allthingschocolate]

Not sure there's anything you can do about it if they are on the road, usually only the pavement can be classed as your land or not, like our house deeds include the pavement outside our house but not the road so as much as my neighbours do it constantly there's nothing I can do about it, an unless they are causing real problems (blocking your drive) then I doubt there's anything you can do

Hi it’s not a road it forms part of the pathway to my house/drive if that makes sense

 

[JoeBloggs]

I have an issue with a credit card I used for vacation purposes.

I made two transfers from my current account to my credit card account to clear the balance. The transactions were fully processed but the credit card balance still remains the same and didn’t reduce at all.


Additionally, I had set up a monthly direct debit 2 months ago to make minimum payments on the card and the direct debit never took place. I’m assuming it’s because I made prior manual transfers with amounts greater than the minimum payment but still.

Has anyone ever experienced this issue? No transactions were made in the meantime.

How did you make the transfers? Did you do it manually inputting the details yourself or did the bank pre fill it?

I would call the credit card company with all the details, it may be sitting as pending if they have been unable to allocate it.

 

[Aliceegordo]

Hi everyone,
Bit of a long-winded one I apologise! I've (F27) been with my current boyfriend (M27) for around 9 months and we are just about to move in together. My family and most of my friends absolutely adore him and think we are perfect together. For context, my six year relationship with my ex ended pretty traumatically last year and everyone is thrilled to see me happy and being treated how I deserve, I truly have never been happier.

However, there has been an ongoing situation over a couple of months that has been upsetting me. My boyfriend and my best mate (F27) went to school together, they have known each other their whole lives. They didn't keep in touch after school but have obviously now rekindled as a result of our relationship. A few months ago on a night out, my best friend started to really criticise my boyfriends best mate and his relationship (both of whom she also went to school with). It was totally uncalled for and she should have known better than to slag off someone's best friend in front of them. My boyfriend was upset about it and had a conversation with his friend about what she'd said and he was understandably upset. We bumped into them a couple of weeks later where my best friend continued to talk about their relationship in front of him, despite me trying to change the subject a million times.

Cut to a few months later, we were on a night out (me, my best friend and my partner), when we bumped into my boyfriends best mate and his girlfriend. They ignored each other until the end of the night when they were leaving and her sister deliberately barged into my friend which was totally uncalled for. My friend was upset and my boyfriend had a frank conversation with her where he did tell her that he was upset by the comments she had made about his best friend, so he had told him and he was clearly upset by it. We were both mortified by the sister's behaviour and are in no way excusing that. My friend was grateful for the honesty, even though she was upset that he'd told his friend what she'd said (although I'd argue that if someone was saying those things about my best friend, I would also want her to know). She also made it very clear that she didn't want us to speak to the other couple about what had happened. We cleared the air and I thought the situation was in the past.

A couple of weeks ago, my boyfriends best mate and his partner got engaged and they had an impromtu engagement party. I didn't tell my best friend as I didn't think she'd want to hear about two people she doesn't like getting engaged/thought she would annoyed if it looked like I was 'asking permission' to go. Cut to this weekend, when she saw photos of the party and was incredibly upset. She called me and said that if it was her, she wouldn't have gone to the party at all and that it looked like I was 'choosing' to be mates with them because that's what my boyfriend wants, despite how it makes her feel. I tried to make it very clear that I'm not 'choosing' to be friends with them, but as they are my boyfriend's best friends I am going to have to be around them. I apologised for not letting her know about the party and that I appreciated for her, it looked shady even though in that moment I really thought I was doing the right thing. By the end of the conversation, she accepted (I think) that I am going to have to see them as a result of them being my boyfriends friends and that I will be transparent about when that is happening in the future, but it doesn't mean that I'm best friends with them or excusing their behaviour.

However, as an anxious soul I feel like I'm now just constantly on edge about it all. I can totally appreciate that she is upset and her feelings are valid, but I do think she's putting me in an impossible situation. My boyfriend is here to stay and as a result, so are his friends. I will never be best friends with them but as a fact of life, I am going to have to see them.

Any advice on how you would handle this/how I can stop feeling so anxious about this situation would be really appreciated!!

TLDR: Best friend making me feel guilty for spending time with boyfriends friends

Hi everyone, coming back to this thread after a couple of months!

Things have been much better with my best friend, her and my boyfriend have been getting on great. However...we've now been invited to the actual engagement party for his best friend and fiancee (who the post above is about) and I'm struggling to know how to navigate it with my best friend. I don't want to not go to the party, as it's my boyfriends best mate and he is a groomsman at the wedding. But I am dreading telling my best friend in case she falls out with me again. I feel like our last convo ended in a good place, with her saying that she understands that I'm going to have to see them but I'm not sure if me actively going to their engagement party is a bit seperate to that... Advice please??

 

[OnlyHereForTheLolz]

They are neutered- we got them from a rescue who neuter before rehoming- Neutered Toms will still defend their territory
The stray/ new cat probably isn’t but if it owned my the neighbour I think might own him- he is careless with his animals ( dogs chase livestock etc, not chipped ) so I doubt he will give cat any attention

That’s strange. Once our cat was neutered he was left alone. Neutered males aren’t called Toms so that’s where my confusion came in.
Put a paper collar on the black cat asking the owners to contact you

 

[House of Tea]

Not a problem as such but need to buy a birthday gift for a 1 yr old - neighbour’s child. Spend would be £30 quid. What do you suggest?

 

[Hastaggifted]

Advice please . I've given antihistamine and covered in savlon. I'm a good level headed mother until things like this that I can't control. Is there a better cream I should be using?

 

[Rxt156]

Why do my blondies come out the oven with the consistency of a cake

 

[havee]

so washing machine broke down, laudry was piling up so bought one on a whim from facebook marketplace. Asked the seller if its works, reassured me twice that it does. however now that I've used it there seems to be problems. it makes a looooot of noise when spinning. plus i forgot to check if it has a shorter cycle, the shortest it has is 30 mins at only 30 degrees and the other options are 2 hours. disregarding th cycles have i been scammed cause of the noise of spinning.

update guys the button panel has stopped working, when i press n button nothing happens. where can i get a good affordable 8kg washing machine, does anyone have a recommendation of brand or product.

 

[_basic_]

It's against the law for the landlord to use the deposit as rent without consent from the tenant. They can contact the deposit protection scheme about the situation who will guide them through the process. But maybe just mentioning to the agency and landlord that this is what the person intends to do might make them release the money

Thanks for your response, yes the agent was the one who said they aren’t allowed to use the deposit for the rent. The landlord has been challenged asking if that’s what they mean when they said they are “out of pocket” for a months rent in response to being asked when the deposit will be returned. We are awaiting response from the agent on the professional manner of the landlord before we go further. But I’m not familiar with the deposit schemes I was just hoping they do what they are meant to. Not looking forward to them having to go through the dispute process as I’m sure the landlord is going to try and deduct things

 

[Pesky Tarian]

What do people buy their kids teachers at the end of term? I’m stuck for ideas and don’t want to buy tat that isn’t wanted!

I bought Costa vouchers last year which were very well received (this was the only year they didn't have a zillion T.A's though so made it affordable!). This year I'm thinking nice notebook + hand gel maybe, something like that.

 

[griftalo]

I know Heahrow has a duty free just as you exit the airport when you come back. Check if Manchester has the same

They haven’t when I’ve flown unless I’ve missed it. Malta have one when you land.