The advice thread for random problems #5

[chickhicks86]

I am a student living with m parents in social housing. the council considers me a non- dependant to my parents so have set a rent price according to my age. anyway however as i live at home when i showed them evidence of me being a student they deducted my rent from the total rent as i am a student and they dont expect me to pay. however my parents rent is calculated on how much excess income they have and the rest the benefit pays. however he tells me that all the rent charged to him is my rent as i am a non-dependent living with him. i have explained to him but he is saying i am lying so when rent arrears come he tells me it my fault. what can i do.

When you say "him" who do you mean? Your dad or an employee from Universal Credit?

 

[becca7721]

It shouldn’t be cut after 6pm because of risk of infection to the grass.
In terms of noise I don’t think it matters assuming you’re using a mower.

 

[Snippysnips]

In my (very) limited experience the neighbours are made aware by council before it being granted. It’s up to them to then put forward objections. That said I was always been the immediate neighbour so the council may not bother for anyone further away.

I had thought that as well, but we have had no notice, it just started one morning, we aren't right next door, but it's a small cul de sac we are in an we are very close to the house so I'd have assumed we were close enough to have been told

This is of course all assuming they did apply for planning permission an haven't just went an done the work which Tbh the type they are I wouldn't be surprised if they haven't sent requests for it being done

 

[avabella]

The only way is getting re-powder coated or if they’re diamond cut, a polish. Some places do offers for all 4 wheels, you’re looking at probably £200+ depending on size / powder coated or diamond cut.

 

[OnlyHereForTheLolz]

Anyone here have any experience of pregnant cats? I can post photos. I think this cat that I’m looking after while its owners are on holiday is pregnant. I’m not sure how to check for certain. I have a vet appointment for her on Thursday and I’m hoping they can confirm. Honestly, I don’t know why the owners haven’t had her spayed. My two are both spayed so I’ve never had this problem.

Why is her being pregnant an issue? Or are you scared she'll give brith while with you? I mean yes, cats should be spayed but a pregnancy isn't like some very stressfull thing.

 

[Kim Mild]

I was at a cafe and I had an oat latte. After I'd finished mine , someone took their drink back saying their drink was off and the staff made them another drink, which was an oat latte. I'm hoping they originally had a soya latte , but my drink wasn't that nice either
Anyone know what happens if you drink plant based milk that is off?

 

[Kim Mild]

I bled almost constantly/unpredictably for at least 3 months. They kept saying it’d calm down and eventually did but was still not perfect.
Sort of defeated the object!
I tried a few different brands and some were better than others but it took convincing as they kept saying they are basically all the same.
Id speak to the doc if it continues.

Yeah , i think it defeats the object too . Even if the bleeding sorted itself , I think my bad mood is due to this pill , rather than just being grumpy. I can't see that getting better.
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I’d try a different pill. I was on cerazette and bled constantly and was sick, switched to rigevidon and 0 side effects. Recently due to migraines I was made to switch to noriday and again no side effects I think it affects everyone differently and it’s about finding the pill for you. But if you preferred it before then you have the option to come off it completely if you wish. Hope the bleeding stops soon its horrible when it seems never ending x

Rigividon is a combined pill, that's the one I used to be ona few years ago . I might see I'd I can try the combined pill again .
I don't know if I should stop this one now , or wait til the end of the pack .

 

[chickhicks86]

yh theres none near me sadly, but are they ale to open a locked phone?
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yh i tried but it says i need to allow laptop to access storage on phone
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what??really, ive tried many apps not heard of this one, is it free? do you think it'll work with locked phone

wait i just checked, it says it needs to be downloaded on both devices to work

If you have a Chromebook with the Play store on, you can find it on there and choose to download it to your phone.
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Also, from t'internet -

Bypass With Find My Mobile Website
Samsung offers a cloud-based Find My Mobile portal that can remotely control Galaxy phones. After logging in with your Samsung account here, try these steps:

1. Use 'Unlock' option to disable any pattern lock set.
2. You may also use 'Reset' function which factory data resets device.

Using only the Unlock feature will retain all your stored phone data while lifting any pattern. Just be sure Find My Mobile setup was previously completed on the locked device.
Huge benefit is no software or tools required - just an internet browser!

 

[Kim Mild]

I need some advice as to whether I should raise this encounter as a complaint to the store manager:

I went to purchase a clothing item at a well-known store. The item was full price (not on sale). I got to the till and the sales associate processes my purchase. Literally the minute the card terminal read payment ‘approved’, the sales associate proceeds to say ‘You have 14 days for exchange only, no refund’.

I got really annoyed because I found it absolutely shady she didn’t mention the special refund policy before I’d paid for the item. She willingly concealed this information until the payment terminal approved the transaction. Additionally, nowhere at the till did they have a plaque stating the return policy.

In addition to her not being particularly pleasant, I found this type of practice rather shady.

Was it Sports Direct ?

 

[griftalo]

Report it to environmental health, they will issue an enforcement notice to your landlord.

Environmental health was the department I was struggling to name

 

[CharlieTYBT]

Do you think that maybe he is having therapy? Sometimes people are encouraged to reach out and made amends. I would sit comfortable in the knowledge that you were polite and responded but also take it as closure for yourself and absolutely keep that door closed.

I doubt it, he isn't the type to admit wrong and I was thinking on this possibility too, surely if he is having therapy, he still wouldn't have sent the one message then went quiet again. But then again, guys make no sense at the best of times lol. I know it really shouldn't matter but it's now left me thinking, was it genuine or was it to test me out or something

 

[becca7721]

Sorry I mean E not DD! Opps.

 

[Snippysnips]

I do them! You have choices, you can input your data manually, or it can come from your wrist device (mine is Apple Watch) and you can also choose with some if you do the long or shorter challenge. Re the medal, you go through a checkout to get the medal, to make sure the address is correct etc. I’ve got a few medals now, I’ve had some issues with my watch sending date since I switched phone, but since I’m mainly using them now for other things than walking or running I’ve not made a huge effort to rectify that. You can also have several on the go at once. I haven’t done a Harry Potter one, I signed up for the scooby doo one thinking my kids would like it, and honestly it’s rubbish. I’ve much preferred the ones with actual map view you can nosy around, the scooby doo one is just a cartoon background with a line you move along, so I’d maybe try and look at what the potter one is formatted like before signing up as I would be disappointed if it was like the scooby one. The medals are really nice. I had one arrive broken and they just sent out another but it’s just been the one.

Thanks, as far as am aware I think it's just a map line you move along, it mentioned something about house points as well, can you adjust the time as you go? The harry potter one is quite long so I was thinking if I gave myself quite a few months to do it then if I was managing to do more distance than I thought then I could bring the time down? Or can you just leave the time you have picked an if you finish before it then it's fine?

Are the medals quite good quality as well, this one is quite expensive an I'd be disappointed if the price didn't reflect the quality of the medals, they look like steel in the videos but videos can be off

 

[GalaxyGirl70]

Can you just connect your phone to a laptop and copy the photos? I managed with sidesync and a cable connection. I hadn't installed on the phone as the screen was so badly damaged.

 

[OnlyHereForTheLolz]

Trying to distance myself from people that I’ve outgrown. Not happening very easily. Any advice on how to politely remove myself from their lives without too many questions/accusations that I’m being ‘off’ with them?

I’m in a similar situation. Normally I would just disappear and text short but with this person I find it difficult as they are so nice.
My game plan is to not engage and if they invite me out to be busy. However if they ask me when is suitable I will go out for a coffee, stay 2-3 hours and then leave.
This is working out to seeing them about 3 times a year and I can live with that. I also figure once I move I can cut contact
PS the date I give that is suitable is always like at least a month in advance!

 

[newtoyou]

Thoughts on pulling sickies at work…?

So I’m a very goodie two shoes staff member, always on time, work hard, don’t pull sickies. But I’m pretty sure colleagues do.

A few months ago I had a couple of sick days because I just didn’t want to go in (I’ve been feeling stressed for a few reasons at work), but I said it was a cold.

Next week I have a meeting with a colleague who is lovely but intense. We’re working on a project together which we’ve been doing for over a year. She gets really into things into levels of detail that drains me. And she can’t let things go when she doesn’t agree.

If I pull a sickie we won’t have to reschedule it cos it’s a prep meeting for another one the next day.

So what do you think? I feel really guilty but at the same time I don’t think I can cope with any more of this! The project will be over soon but I’m mentally exhausted from it and her intensity.

 

[becca7721]

Thanks for all!!

Products aren’t full price there - hence shopping there.

The bags (paper as well as plastic) not being free is law here, there’s a minimum charge and must be kept separate.

Make your friend aware of your concerns. Her husband is going to get them in trouble with this.

Personally I would let the local council know what is going on. They won't just shut the shop down but give them advice and time to improve

Also if her husband acts like that in general it's a concern and I would probably avoid them both. He can end up causing you a lot of trouble

I did make her aware yesterday, she was shocked and immediately said she needed to ask him and that was when it all went south and his true colours showed. I know the council have already been out because of other issues with the shop to do with allergens/no disabled access (far too cluttered - yes I’m aware of the irony of me, a hoarder, saying that) she said they were simple fixes and some other stuff they needed to sort, kept going back. BUT at that time the best before issue didn’t exist (as it was start of September and dates I found were 30/09/24); one item (bag of small chocolate bars for Halloween) is cheaper from Tesco with clubcard *and* not after best before.

Prior to the shop they had a market stall in England, from what was said yesterday (another rant ) that’s still the case. Because of devolution there’s many laws that are different here. No matter how much they (or most of us to be frank) rant about them.

I totally agree regarding her husband!!

 

[OnlyHereForTheLolz]

Thank you for your response. She tells me it's very easy, she shows me what she does. I have also had her tested and she is considered gifted. She was bullied but that was kind of dealt with but now is kind of left out of things.
. Which she doesn't mind too much... it's just said to witness.
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She would know 2 people at the new school
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She makes friends fine. She also wants to stay because she doesn't have to try very hard... her words. She wants to stay because she loves this particular teacher who is there two days a week.

If she is gifted then why not have her skip a grade or 2? Is there a reason they’ve not offered you this option

 

[Snippysnips]

I'll reach out to the vet and see what they say. What makes me nervous is that despite now not having seen the cat in over a year and no actual requests to, we never signed any kind of formal contract. Any time she's mentioned it now, she seems careful with her words - she's 'entrusted' him to me but never 'XXX owns him now' outright. But I've registered him to a vet, taken him regularly, and he's well looked after now and I have all of his medical papers from her.

Thanks @Clickbait and @Rodneytrotter also!

Hmm it's tricky if she's being smart by using the words "entrusted" an hasn't just outright said it's yours, am not sure how it works but I'd imagine there's some sort of time limit on it like if it's been over a year then surely she can't suddenly have claims to the cat again or be entitled to any news of said cat

How old is it? If it's getting on I know it sounds cruel an nasty but could you say it's passed on?

I'd still do what clickbait said an just really limited the messages, even take a few days to reply an say you are just busy an keep them short, I hope she eventually leaves you alone, it must be incredible annoying an frustrating that she keeps at you

 

[littlepup]

I take multivitamins and iron, additional B8 and B12, biotin and cranberry supplements - not considered fish oil but I'd thought that was more for joint pain rather than bone pain. I probably should have added as well I'm in my late 30s. Had Covid 3 times previously but not for 18 months, although the pains are very similar to ones I had when I did have it but it's been going on too long to be that...

Fish oils are thought to help bone density and reduce inflammation. I'd look at the magnesium in your multi-vit too and make sure it's a decent dose.
You could ask to be tested around peri-menopause, check your oestrogen levels (I only say 'peri-menopause' as a buzz word to get them to listen and check hormones).
Are you doing a lot of leg work in the gym? Shin splints can feel like bone pain, is there anything like that it could be?
Something like fibromyalgia can be helped by antidepressants but they can also trigger fatigue and restless legs, it might be worth having a meds review to cover all bases and ensure none of your supplements are clashing.
I'd just lay it on thick. But the absence of any weight loss, fever, brain fog, night sweats etc (assuming you don't have them) is a good sign.
I hope they don't just fob you off and look at all the options.