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Pesky Tarian

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I went with a box dye and now look more normal. Brown with slight highlights, instead a full head of yellow hair
I'm glad you got sorted. It's so frustrating to pay all that money and then walk out the salon feeling less than great. I spent 20 years paying for highlights but for the last year I've done my own box dye and much prefer the results. No-one knows your own hair like you.
 
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I want to get into a morning & evening routine at 33! 😂 My job I can turn up between 8-10am but everyone else starts at 8am while I start at 9.30. I don’t do my skincare and I’m always rushing etc.

So if I want to start work at 8am, be at work for 7:50 so enough time to log on, get a coffee etc and travel time is 15 mins max.

I prefer having breakfast when I’ve been awake for about 2hrs so happy to have that at work etc.

What time should I wake up and go to bed if I need about 8hrs sleep? And do my skincare etc.
A morning skincare routine at your age should take about 10min max. Wash, cleanse, eye cream, moisturise and then put sunscreen on!
You can do extra bits at night which is best anyway
 
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becca7721

VIP Member
I’ve been feeling very low these last couple of weeks and I have my appraisal at work tomorrow. I’ve got to write about all the things I’ve done, and my achievements etc but with my low mood I’m finding it really difficult to write anything.

I feel like I’ve achieved nothing and I’m a crap worker. Every time I try to write anything positive there’s just this voice telling me I’m not good enough and I’m bad at my job. I feel like if I write anything positive my manager will just laugh in my face and tell me I’m scum.

She won’t do that but my brain is not functioning correctly and I feel so down about it.

I’m stuck in this awful rut and it’s really lonely.
Can you try viewing yourself in the third person?
So what would you say about a friend who had done what you’ve done?

I know it sounds odd but it’s something that’s helped me in past when applying for jobs.
 
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JoeBloggs

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im back again with rent arrears. found out rent account is only on my moms name presumably intentionally done by my 'dad'. but he is the one that brings the income etc but doesn't pay the rent. letters come to my mum she cant read them, i read them we're being evicted, causing a lot of stress. this happened last year as well but my dad isnt accepting the rent as a requirement tat he has to paying. council isnt really understanding. what can i do, even if i go to advice bureau they need my dad and his income etc just so stressed and depressed
I understand this might sound harsh, but it's important to remember that your dad is an adult who was fully aware of the responsibilities when he agreed to the tenancy. If he doesn’t accept that rent must be paid, then this may serve as a difficult but necessary lesson. Eviction, particularly from council properties, is a lengthy process, so there is still time to address the situation.

I strongly encourage you to reach out to your university and explore what support they can offer you, especially in terms of finding accommodation of your own. This is not your responsibility to bear, and it's important to prioritise your own well-being and future.

If the property is only in your mums name, there is nothing stopping you and her going to the Council and seeking accomodation without your dad.
 
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So I work in an office with no choice to WFH as there's some physical aspects. But 90% of the time I'm sat on my PC, bored out of my mind endlessly scrolling tattle 🤣

Is there anything I can do on my PC, without the need of headphones, to be productive? My screen is obscured from the rest of the office so could realistically do anything. I just feel like I should be doing something with my time that gives me more value...

I've done some Duolingo but not being able to do the listening/speaking aspects feels like cheating.
 
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@becca7721 that’s outrageous! Can you change GP surgery? I do know that is not always easy to do.

I’ve pulled up the Welsh versions for you. Sorry I can’t offer more help. It sounds really tough.


Here is the Welsh version:

mental health support in Wales

(CBT - Do not need a GP referral)


Information about dealing with the police inc: complaints
 
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Rodneytrotter

VIP Member
In my experience the GP will just say take paracetamol, have warm baths. Do you have a wheat bag or something you can warm and rest on your neck?.
Yes I'll put something on it. Ive taken paracetamol and ibuprofen. It's because I've been unwell, and now have a rash too on my hands so wasn't sure if they were linked.
 
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Snippysnips

VIP Member
Not a problem as such but need to buy a birthday gift for a 1 yr old - neighbour’s child. Spend would be £30 quid. What do you suggest?
I got my neice one of those water pen drawing things, it's like a mat an then you can fill the little pen with water and they can draw all over it, it's no mess which was perfect, she was quite happy sitting for ages just drawing all over the mat, pretty sure the one I got come with stamps too

I also got her a water mat that had little fish things inside it, you filled it with water and she could hit on it an move the little fish

I guess it would be depending on the child but kinetic sand was another thing she did an still does enjoy, however she's never left unsupervised with it, at age one she just loved squeezing it an now at 3 she loves to make things with it so it's done quite a while, play doh as well was another hit, but it depends on if you feel the kid is still too young for them
 
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cowtastrophe

VIP Member
They shouldn’t be calling them on their day off and they shouldn’t be confronting them directly. It’s an HR issue. How did they get their number?
We all have each other’s numbers. I realise there are two separate issues at play here - the behaviour of the employee going through all the timesheets and the fact she was able to access the timesheets.

The former has been raised to her manager though this is very far from the first time she’s been reported for bullying. The issue about the accessibility of the timesheets is something I raised already due to previous incidents of this employee going through them and sharing information she found in them with others. The response I got was that the hours worked are not secret which sort of missed the point a bit.

It‘s not that I have anything to hide and my hours/breaks are completely legit. I just object to a colleague analysing my timesheet, making assumptions and then stirring shit by going round misrepresenting it and accusing me and others of fraud. Personally, I feel that completed timesheets are confidential and should only be used by your manager and payroll but I accept that this may not be standard practice.
 
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Snippysnips

VIP Member
go onto safari/browser and go into your gmail by clicking the circle at the top with your initial, click ‘manage your Google account’, People & Sharing, scroll down to contacts and there’s a section there for blocked addresses
Thank you, I usually do everything through my gmail app on the phone an it seems to not give you the full options with everything
 
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cowtastrophe

VIP Member
There's nothing to love about a man who is always looking over your shoulder just in case he's missing out. It's such a basic lack of respect for you. I've always joked with my husband that I don't care who he looks at, but the day he starts doing in front of me, we're done.
Very much this. It’s one thing to have a sneaky appreciative look but quite another to be twisting your head like the bloody exorcist to gawp at someone in front of your partner. It’s completely disrespectful and just basic behaviour.
 
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Aliceegordo

New member
I totally get wanting to take a step back, but as a matter of perspective, has she been cheated on before? A lot of people who have gone through that have had friends and / or family who knew about the cheating and didn't say a word, who didn't "take their side" in the break-up and are still friendly with the cheater even though it's a very painful thing to go through and it puts a massive dent in your self esteem. Were I in that situation, it would devastate me if my friends or family didn't rain hell and brimstone down on the cheater. Maybe the whole situation is just a massive trigger for her?
Hey,

Totally get what you're saying, and have been in that situation myself! She hasn't been cheated on but I think you're 100% right in thinking that there is clearly something that is triggering her.


I think it's potentially that now my boyfriend is in the group, she had someone that she can gossip about school with. The rest of us all went to school together and have known each other our whole lives whereas she only came into the group when we were 17. I can see how sometimes when we're all talking about school/things that happened growing up, it could potentially be isolating for her. I think potentially she just got a bit carried away with gossip and it came back to bite her? Shedidn't keep any friends from school so there's a chance that she finds it a bit triggering thinking I'm going to leave her for people she went to school with?

I'm trying to have empathy and keep an open mind as best as I can but it's been v difficult when I'm being put in a difficult position :(
 
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My mum is having major surgery tomorrow (triple bypass & 2 valve replacements) I'm not sure what I'm meant to do? Do I go to the hospital & wait whilst she's having the surgery? Do I wait at home & visit in ICU after? I'm next of kin, probate and all that. My siblings aren't going, but I've taken the day off as I know I won't be able to focus in work. Has anyone else bene in this situation? What's the protocol?
You wait at home forma phone call to say if it went well and then if allowed you go and see her.
My dad had bypass surgery years ago and there really is no point hanging round the hospital.
Just ensure you are available
 
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allthingschocolate

Well-known member
Hi all after some advice my next door neighbours mum keeps parking right outside my house as in if I open my door there is her car (which is on my land) if there are no spaces opposite (plenty round the other side which are still very close) I get on well with my neighbours and I really don’t want it to be awkward, but this has happened twice this week so is becoming a lot more frequent, her mum is round a lot (neighbour has just had a baby) which is understandable, her mum did ask me once not so long ago if she could park outside my house so I said yes but I now feel like she’s taking the piss and has assumed she can now park there whenever🤦‍♀️ 🙄 unsure how to approach this I did consider either leaving my car parked where she does (even though I have a driveway) maybe she will take the hint or leave a rubbish bin there?! has anyone been through this before and how did you deal with it?
 
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NoHintOfDrama

VIP Member
The only thing is you’ll need to take a bus or taxi from the airport to the train station
No, they won’t need a taxi from the airport to the train station. at Luton, there’s a rapid transit train thing now from the airport to the train station.
At Gatwick the train station is walkable. Same at Heathrow and Stansted.
 
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Snippysnips

VIP Member
I really need to know what bra size I am, where is the best place to get fitted and has anyone done an online fitting before? Were you happy with the result?
I'd say try a few places, I went to around 5 an 3 of them were giving me the same size which was close to what I was getting online, one place was way off with measuring me too big an another was slightly too small
 
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I really need to know what bra size I am, where is the best place to get fitted and has anyone done an online fitting before? Were you happy with the result?
I walked into my local John Lewis and they were great. I told them I’m shy and awkward and they made me feel very comfortable
 
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becca7721

VIP Member
Thanks.

I’m not sure. I looked up my local dental hospital and it seems it’s mainly dental school students training there.
Look up community dental services. You’ll need a referral and medical reason for going e.g. medical grade phobia/other conditions that impact oral health. It isn’t easy, the services are generally well hidden and guarded and in our area via social services only.
 
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griftalo

VIP Member
Health related. Please skip if it’s triggering (Not asking for diagnosis).

For the past 2/3 weeks, I have been experiencing daily nausea. From the moment I wake up, until bed time. I vomited an entire day two weeks ago and thought it was good poisining but I don’t think this is the case given how long it’s lasted. I thought it was PMS related but I had my period last week, it’s now ruled out.

I can barely eat because of how nauseous I’ve been. My appetite has severely decreased as well but I’m putting this down on the nausea.

The doctor gave me a prescription to use 5 days, it helped a bit but the moment the prescription ended, the nausea came back instantly.

I have blood tests to do, but I’m honestly exhausted. I was at work today and had to rush to the bathroom multiple times because I felt so unwell.

Has anyone ever experienced this?
I have experienced phases of inexplicable nausea in my life and the thing that worked for me was motilium, for pregnancy sickness; keeping my blood sugar stable with lots of protein (eggs for me) and taking b vitamins helped. I know that nausea in pregnancy has been shown to worsen with anxiety and stress, so it’s possible your stress from this could prolong the problem as rubbish as that is. I do sympathise. I’m waking nauseous at the moment through stress and gagging cleaning my teeth… the same way I did when I had to quit uni but I’m also having it in the evening with sneezing and running nose so god knows what this is.
 
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