Flip beltRunners - where do you put your phone when you run? Bum bags don’t work for me, I find they get in the way and I can’t find a decent top or jacket! Help please!
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Don’t have a date at home then! Frankly banishing her mum upstairs in the own house is rude, she should be grateful the was aloud the privacy. She could have got off her arse to talk to her mum instead of text.
OP I think you need to set some rules. Being treated that way in your own home is not ok. Why are walking on egg shell when she’s in a mood, she is 23 not 13!
I mean I get where you’re coming from but I assume she’s living at home to save money? Most young people have to these days. She probably wants to make a good impression on her boyfriend & ideally move in with him / out of her mother’s home at some point. If he’s the right guy he will focus on just his girlfriend and not circumstantial people. I definitely think if I went over to a guy’s house though and his mother did exactly the same things described, I wouldn’t be rushing to spend more time there. I also think it’s almost more okay for parents to behave that way when you’re a teenager but as you grow older you want to feel like your parents are as invested in making a good impression on a potential life partner as you are. The poster could have just as easily not said anything or waited to ask her daughter what they had to eat whenever it was that the guy left.
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I don’t think your daughter should speak to you like that at all. I never spoke to my parents like that EVER.
"Did exactly the same things described" what things though, asking what smells of garlic? Is that really something to get annoyed over?
And what does it matter to the situation she's living at home to save money ? That's exactly it, she not only has that privilege but her mum also sits upstairs to give her privacy with her boyfriend. Then the daughter has the cheek to get annoyed and go off at her mum for a minor comment.
I've said my view upthread, but I still think that commenting on what people are eating/ the smell comes across negatively and will make the guest feel awkward.
We don't know exactly what was said bit it clearly wasn't just a what did you have for dinner or your dinner smells nice question/ comment. Probably more a what's that bad garlic smell? Your dinner smells bad or something like that.
I come back to my original point, what was to be gained by asking, as it clearly wasn't just done in a neutral way. If they said we ordered a roasted bulb of garlic
the answer isn't going to suddenly change the smell. Just open a window, or light a candle if it's that bad.
We don't know exactly what was said bit it clearly wasn't just a what did you have for dinner or your dinner smells nice question/ comment. Probably more a what's that bad garlic smell? Your dinner smells bad or something like that.
I come back to my original point, what was to be gained by asking, as it clearly wasn't just done in a neutral way. If they said we ordered a roasted bulb of garlic
the answer isn't going to suddenly change the smell. Just open a window, or light a candle if it's that bad.It’s not just the smell comment. I don’t actually feel like dissecting the whole minutiae because it really sounds like a sticky situation and I think the best way out of it is to talk to the daughter about how she perceived what happened and work on things from there. It’s like OP said, she was minding her own business and her daughter did seem to open the door to conversation but it didn’t go over well & she should find out why. If she doesn’t, things are just going to grow more uncomfortable between them.
Admit it! You’re tge daughterI've said my view upthread, but I still think that commenting on what people are eating/ the smell comes across negatively and will make the guest feel awkward.
We don't know exactly what was said bit it clearly wasn't just a what did you have for dinner or your dinner smells nice question/ comment. Probably more a what's that bad garlic smell? Your dinner smells bad or something like that.
I come back to my original point, what was to be gained by asking, as it clearly wasn't just done in a neutral way. If they said we ordered a roasted bulb of garlic
Even more reason to be respectful, she asked about the smell of garlic not the his favourite sex position. The daughter over reacted.
Yeah, she sounds keyed up in those texts. I can’t disagree.
Honestly though what's the point in asking? They had something that smelt of garlic. What I don't get is why ask, what difference was the answer going to make to the outcome other than making the guest feel awkward?
I've got children a similar age, and they often have girlfriends/ friends here. The only things I ever comment on are noise and even then I'll ask my son to come to the kitchen to speak to me, I don't go down shouting that they're making too much noise/ waking the neighbours, instead I have a word with my son and let him get everyone to quieten down.
I've got children a similar age, and they often have girlfriends/ friends here. The only things I ever comment on are noise and even then I'll ask my son to come to the kitchen to speak to me, I don't go down shouting that they're making too much noise/ waking the neighbours, instead I have a word with my son and let him get everyone to quieten down.
I agree with this because my mum is sensitive to food smells and would always do this. You’ve just finished a nice meal that you enjoyed and she’d come in ‘eww, what’s that smell’ with a screwed up face. ‘It’s my dinner I’ve really enjoyed consuming, clearly’.I've said my view upthread, but I still think that commenting on what people are eating/ the smell comes across negatively and will make the guest feel awkward.
We don't know exactly what was said bit it clearly wasn't just a what did you have for dinner or your dinner smells nice question/ comment. Probably more a what's that bad garlic smell? Your dinner smells bad or something like that.
I come back to my original point, what was to be gained by asking, as it clearly wasn't just done in a neutral way. If they said we ordered a roasted bulb of garlic
It’s the same as someone doing the old “Eugh, prawns (or whatever), disgusting. I could never eat that, they’re so weird” whilst you’re eating and enjoying them. No need fo comment. It’s bad manners. No one’s asking you to eat it.
I imagine OP said it with a negative undertone - no need to comment, it is annoying.
Having said that, Her response was unacceptable. They were in Mum’s home, she went over the top. The bloke’s an hole if he’s bothered. I don’t know any grown men that are impressed by disrespecting your Mum, she was the one who showed herself up. Hardly a mature response.
Was she showing off, trying to act like you were housemates and she has more authority than she does because she’s embarrassed to live at home?
Unless she pays half the bills, I would tell her next time he or anyone comes she stays in her room and you downstairs until she can learn to respect you and your right to speak in your home.
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Me an my brother both lived at home when we had (new) partners over, if we had ordered food the very first thing my folks would have done is come down an ask what the smell was cause they would have been wondering what we ordered, not once would I have viewed that as being a negative thing an if either of our partners had viewed it as being a negative/embarrassing thing then personally I'd have thought they were arseholes, parents are entitled to act however they want in their own home, an end of the day why the hell would I want my parents acting non existent (forcing them in their own room) or like some posh mute snobs when my partner should be seeing my parents act how they normally act, if he doesn't like them how they are in the first place then he can fk off
She sounds like a very spoilt adult that maybe should stick to dates outside the home is she's that unhappy with a simple question
It seems like you’re implying I might be an “hole” but I just don’t like when people IRL comment on whatever it is I’m eating or even doing. It makes me self aware and uncomfortable.
If someone's parents have to change or walk on eggshells in their own home because they are worried their kids partner will not want to go to their house and will talk about them to family/friends then yes the partner is an hole, I could never imagine having to make my parents change who they are just because it might affect my partner
My brother had a ex that all of us had to constantly walk on egg shells around, couldn't mention this or that, couldn't be seen (in our own house) couldn't make noise or whatever, she was eventually told to fk off
Let’s move on from garlic-gate guys. Anyone know how to get rid of that bumpy chicken skin condition that begins with a k from your arms?
Same here. And as mentioned when my colleague makes a big thing holding her nose etc because she can't stand the smell of 'spicy food' it puts everyone on edge, and it's just OTT.
I get that the OP wasn't going as far as my colleague, but in my mind there's a difference between 'ooh that smells nice what did you have' and 'ewww what's that smell' especially when it's being shouted from one room to another.
I don't think the daughter's response by text was merited, but I suspect there is more to it than just one conversation.
There's a difference between walking on eggshells and having some respect/ consideration for others. I don't like to be made uncomfortable and I don't like making others uncomfortable. Hence I think before I speak, and appreciate others who do similarly. The ones who don't and consider themselves as plain speakers are usually arseholes
You need a body lotion with salicylic acid. Palmers do one, smoothing lotion, for about £6. Superdrug do an own brand one cheaper I think or there’s Paula’s choice or CeraVe for slightly more.
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Keratosis pilaris! I also have this it's a pain and I've tried salicylic acid as suggested above but it didn't seem to help me. There's a lot on reddit about it
My friend swears that taking collagen cured her KP and really improved her hormonal acne and psoriasis (or maybe it was eczema? Whatever, her skin is incredible!)
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