KindnessMatters
Chatty Member
I want to thank the Mods for reinstating GLP's post, and GLP for posting it in the first place, because I think everyone here deserves an answer to any questions about me they might have. I've made mistakes and unfortunately made this a place where people now feel concerned about my motives and even more vulnerable about sharing, and they don't deserve that.Kindness matters.
You are a regular commenter on the MT and have been for a while now (think you joined in early December?), yet you've missed all talk of the nasty screenshots being shared from the MT to twitter by FMs and all the talk amongst the FMs of certain posters like Penguin and M33L4, it's been talked about by us on the MT a lot through various threads.
You have been gatekeeping kindness/ moral policing regular posters who have replied to certain posters (some of whom were also mentioned in the last thread as suspect posters) that seem to lean heavily towards offensive/hurtful posts but being strangely forgiving of the writers of said offensive/hurtful posts in comparison. No gatekeeping for them, just regular posters.
Like I said earlier you did the same to me when Lillyheart made her "are you a mother comment" to various posters. Then had the same happen to you which you mentioned in your opening post here.
People who have looked at your twitter posting history and likes have said they aren't showing you in a very nice light so you gatekeeping certain posters seems particularly off to me.
You saying now you know you were wrong and sorry again seems disingenuous to me.
How long did it take you to realise AE & co were bullies btw? I think the majority of people, even those that started out thinking A was wronged, very rapidly figured out that AE and FMs were rage and hate filled bullies.
You like comments regularly as part of your user history, it's just how you use the thread - as most of us do. Read and reactbut some posters think you even like comments that would be somewhat inappropriate for you to like. I agree with them FWIW, it does seem odd to do that.
But then saying that you regularly like as you read, you've read through TT1, according to you to get to know us better, without liking any of the posts.
Just reading and taking in the information about us all and then I think we were about 18 pages in when you joined this one? But you haven't liked any of the posts in those 18 pages either of this the current thread before you commented.
Yes it's a public forum and therefore available to read to the world and his dog... but personally I find that a little creepy, almost like doing research rather than just joining in like other posters have. Apparently I'm not the only person disquieted by that either.
I find it unusual that someone would do as you say you did.
After having such a violently negative reaction to what little you say you read the first time (but enough to base the reaction on you say), and blocked on all sides by AE and FMs you said you decided to come back here and learn a bit more about us. There are thousands of forums on the internet, lots of different corners on Tattle even. It just seems really strange to me that you'd come back to a place you found so abhorrent of all places in your spare time online, which you've said is precious little. I'd probably have gone off to find something completely different if it were me I think.
I also find it a bit interesting that after reading the last thread where a few people all mentioned you at various points throughout as a suspicious poster, you weren't put off.
You weren't angry (I'd be furious if someone thought I was an FM), instead you decided to join thread 2 , introduce yourself while letting us know you had read our comments, that you knew what we thought of you.
It's created a bit of a stir no matter what too hasn't it, which is rather a shame for the thread which was ticking along nicely otherwise. It would have been uncomfortable even if I and others hadn't said anything I think, some posters may have stopped and may still stop sharing. That would upset me to know my presence might have that sort of effect on people if I were in your shoes.
The baiting someone on twitter thing was very confusing because at the time I thought you had outed yourself as Tallulah and it's not gotten any less confusing for me since learning you aren't.
I'm sure you said something along the lines of "I liked it to see if anyone else would so I could report them... but then I was the only one who liked it" which even after finding out you aren't Tallulah is a very strange thing to say. Why like a post to see who else does after you so you can report them for it? Why not just report the post and anyone who likes it? (What post did you think we were talking about here even?) but whatever that seemed a really strange response to me. - to be honest I'm a bit beyond with this part now. I doubt it's going to become any clearer than soup as we continue.
In all your responses to people instead of putting things down in a simple to understand way, it seems to me that you have been a bit vague and have very much downplayed what your part in things have been.
In addition because you have talked a lot about the struggles you face in life in all your replies, it comes across to me as though you are using the kindness and sympathy of the people on these threads, to bridge what I see are the holes in your story if you will. You'd have got a lot more traction with me, I think if you'd kept your personal struggles out of it and just stood up as you are and said I've done XYZ, no excuses just straight up full ownership and responsibility. Telling everyone what struggles you have dilutes what you are saying and makes it seem as though you are playing for sympathy. As you know from reading the Turd threads, a lot of us are uncomfortable about confrontation. To my mind if I were so inclined that would seem fertile ground to till if approached in the correct manner, your approach would be almost in line with how I would expect someone with an agenda to act. I am not stating this is what you are doing as fact, just thinking out loud if you like.
I really hope this reply is allowed to stand because I am really trying to be polite but I think these are important points that other users in this thread should take into consideration.
I'd also like to apologise again to the regular posters here. I really am sorry this has turned into a bit of a stress for everyone, and I hope I'm not speaking out of turn now.
I'll do my best to answer your questions, but if I forget something please feel free to ask me again and I'll answer.
I don't think you should be apologising to the regular posters here, because this whole problem was my fault and you are right to be wanting to know about me, and the other users here deserve answers too. I'll do my best to answer your questions in the order they're written.
II
Yes I did join in December, and did learn from posts here that some members of Tattle had been cruelly singled out by some of the FMs, and were mocked for some very personal details they'd shared. I was as horrified to see that they and their MH was being laughed at. I do not remember which FMs were mocking them, and as I was relatively new I didn't remember which Tattlers were being targeted, but I in no way agree with anything the FMs said and at that time assumed it was just horrible FMs saying these things and assumed AE didn't condone or agree with what they had said.
I'm really sorry if my comments or posts came off as Moral Policing to anyone. I have seen some obvious FMs in here (or people I assumed where obvious FMs) but I didn't suspect some of the people you, and others, suggested were FMs in the previous threads. I would like to think I'm pretty good at picking up on cues in person, but if anything's been shown here I'm lousy at doing it online! I do believe in giving people the benefit of the doubt and if someone says something questionable I do hope they're not being mean, like Lilymyheart, and try to make sure they really are insulting others on purpose or whether they worded it badly. That's why when she said what she did about people without children I offered her the chance to make it clear that she meant it as an attack against us or not. I did the same thing the other night when another person made a "no children" comment. I gave them the benefit of the doubt and questioned them on their intent, and when they doubled down on their statement and stood by it I was hurt, and that's why I came here and posted about it.
I don't know an exact timeline on when I realised people here were right about AE, but thanks to Welp and any others that posted I discovered that AE was posting and deleting comments, something which I'd never been aware of before. This got my suspicions up about her. I still saw comments that I wasn't sure were true or not, like people saying AE was an alcoholic and mixing it with drugs. I personally had seen no evidence of that before joining here, so I assumed at first they were probably just joke videos that she made, and that she was being her version of funny on camera, and people here were comparing her to Betty Broderick (who I'd never heard of before) but soon learnt was a double murderer. So that was my initial reaction to some comments here, that some were saying she was definitely a drug taking alcoholic who was like a killer. I thought those comments were quite shocking at the time. I didn't know she'd confessed to taking drugs and alcohol at the same time, or that she did it regularly, and I really thought the Betty Broderick comparisons were in poor taste. I thought if she was just being compared to a narc I could see some similarities (though I wasn't sure she met all the technical traits of a narcissist or whether she was just an abusive, arrogant, unpleasant person, but I really thought comparing her to someone who'd brutally murdered two people was quite horrible. Sad to say though, the more I've seen AE unravel even I have become worried that she might harm the children or IG and BW. And that's really not something I say lightly.
I don't know what posts I have 'liked' here that others found unusual, so I can't say why I liked them. Sometimes I like a post if I agree with part of what has been said, but not all of it. With regards to not 'liking' posts on the previous TT thread, I can't say if I did or didn't like any of them, I honestly don't pay that much attention to or remember which posts I have liked, I don't keep track of it. When I was reading the previous thread and discovered you and other people thought I was an FM I was hugely shocked and taken aback. I couldn't think of anything I'd done here to make people think I was an abusive FM like those on twitter, and I was sad and hurt, and disappointed to see the things people really thought of me, behind my back. I think everyone would find it sad to see people you like speaking about you like that, and it knocked the wind out of my sails, but when I came to this thread later on and posted, I assumed the people who didn't like me were not going to talk to me, I assumed and hoped that there were some people here who liked me and it was them I was talking to when I posted. And to my surprise some who had said they didn't like me or were suspicious of me, still took the time and responded to me and gave me some very helpful and nice advice, which I really appreciated.
My reasons for joining Tattle were what I said earlier. I wondered why so many people were saying (what I at the time thought) were negative things about AE and it made me wonder why they were so anti her. Not having seen the bad side of her I assumed, incorrectly, that people here were wrong but I was interested in finding out why they felt the way they did. I like learning about people and wondered what made them see her as a narc and I'd wondered if it was because she reminded them of someone in their own lives, either way I find people fascinating and wanted to learn more about the reasons behind the accusations. I don't spend much time online, I know you don't believe me, and I don't blame you or anyone for feeling that way, but I really am sick. I'm housebound and either spend all my days in bed or the lounge room watching tv. I use the internet to play a game and scroll a bit through twitter or IG but that's about it. And when I decided to have a look here to try and understand peoples reasons for seeing AE that way I found out a lot of information about her that I'd never heard or seen before - things I could see were in her own words and not just people's opinions of her. So I started to get to see the real AE. And along the way I got to see the members of the forum through things they posted and was pleasantly surprised to find out it was a group of really nice people, not at all what I'd assumed from my original viewings of the place. So the more I got to know about AE the less I liked her, and the more I got to know the people posting here the more I got to like them.
With the misunderstanding about you thinking I was Tallulah, you mentioned this post
Ioan Gruffudd & Alice Evans #44 Ioan’s toothbrush has left the building!
"So Tone - he wants to take me to court for being 'abusive' to him for many years." — From Alice's Tweet I did some research and I suspect Alice was served with papers regarding a hearing for a DV Restraining Order. It would explain why Ioan was escorted by a sheriff (or off duty sheriff) to...
tattle.life
I wasn't exactly sure why you were upset that I'd 'liked' @rle110320's comment, as 23 other people (including people here) 'liked' it too. I think you misunderstood, did you think I was saying that I 'liked' the Bianca killing tweet on Twitter? Because I didn't. I just 'liked @rle110320's post telling us about it. I wasn't sure why you were upset that I'd liked her comment, and I mentioned that I report people on Twitter who post abusive things, but that was it.
About my health, the only reason I raised the issue was to explain why I hadn't seen AE and the way she behaves on Twitter and IG. If I were online regularly I would have seen what others here have seen, her crazy posts, her drunken videos, her tweeting nasty things and then deleting. I wasn't aware of any of that until I came here and saw the screen shots. I didn't want people to think I had seen AE at her worst and still thought she was a swell gal. I also fall behind on posts here and often find the threads have been locked by the time I get to see them, and so I conserve my energy on not 'liking' all of the posts, even if I do disagree with them, because the thread's been closed and people have moved on to thef next thread and I have a lot of catching up to do. I wasn't using it as a way to make people feel sorry for me, I was just mentioning it because it has impacted how I've seen (or not seen) things on the internet and why I haven' 'liked' a lot of posts I've agreed with.
I do accept responsibility 100 per cent all the mistakes I've made here, and on Twitter. I own them completely and sorrier than I can say that my bad actions have upset, hurt or stressed anyone here at all. It was never my intention to make anyone feel bad, or feel like they can't talk and if I could take all the mistakes away I've made, I would. I'm actually thankful to Penguin and Caitlyn, and anyone else who shared my twitter posts here, because it showed me comments I had made in the past, that I'd forgotten about, and made me realise I have a long way to go to improve myself and become the better person I want to be. I was really shocked and disappointed in myself when I saw the things I'd written, but I'm glad I got them shown to me because it's helped make me realise I wasn't being anything like the person I want to be. I'd like to hope I've changed for the better since writing them, and a lot of that is thanks to the education on many things I've received here. I unreservedly apologise for everything I've done. There is no excuse for my behaviour. And I hope someday that people can see how very sorry I am that I hurt you, and I understand completely have much I've hurt others and I hope that you can feel comfortable posting in here. I never have and never would share things that are said here with anybody. I wish I could prove to you all that I'm sorry for my behaviour and how it's hurt everyone, but I hope you might be able to see that I'm not the same person I was at the beginning of all of this. People on this forum have made me a better person, and I'm sorry I let you down.
It's an iPhone 4... I think 
I'll just crack on with this one till it breaks 
Its not the type of stuff a person advocating for kindness would like, let me put it that way. Like Caitlyn said, I don’t want it to turn into a pile on, but seriously wtf???
and a good shake. I don’t know what’s tf gotten into me.
